Harmony in the Home

139: Champagne Tower Parenting


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Who should I prioritize when deciding where to devote my love and energy?
I can’t remember where I heard this analogy, but it’s good enough to share. Imagine a champagne tower: a pyramid of glasses stacked so that when champagne is poured into a glass, the overflow pours into each row of glasses below it.
Just like placing your relationships on metaphorical rings around Saturn (listen to episode 9!), and just like adults are instructed to put on oxygen before children in airplane cabin pressure emergencies, YOU in your role as a caretaker need to be the first recipient of your own love and energy. Self-sacrificing behavior on behalf of your spouse, children, or literally any other person is too easily warped into a martyr complex (listen to episode 61!) to justify that kind of expenditure of energy.
In this episode, I will discuss the champagne tower analogy of relationships in more detail. I will touch on the many ways in which you can and should put yourself first. And best of all, I will go over the reason this analogy (like Saturn) is so useful: if you are happy and healthy, and if you talk to yourself in a positive way and treat yourself well, all your other relationships will benefit from that abundance of love and compassion. There is no escaping the law of the harvest: plant the seeds of grace and empathy for yourself in your own heart, and let them grow to reap the benefits.
Remember, you’ve got this!
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Harmony in the HomeBy Kelly Hutcheson

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