Content Warning: We cover the story of Dinah in this episode, which involves a sexual assault.

Shanah Tovah, Theophiloi, and welcome back to what we're pretty sure is the world's only Bible podcast! We're kicking off 5779 with the third part of our increasingly unwieldy discussion of Genesis. This week, the Lentil Stew Boys are back for hijinx as we cover the lives of Jacob and Esau, and give you a shofar performance that critics are already hailing as "well-intentioned." It is both our sexiest and most pro wrestling heavy episode yet, and we're as surprised by that as you are.

Topics of discussion: Our wishes for a sweet Rosh Hashanah, Jacob's invention of cosplay, situations in which literally lying to your blind father about God is totally fine, conservation of blessings, a Jacobian installment of Benito's Anthroponomastics Corner, ordinary eyes, quite a few trips to the bone zone, animal husbandry and sympathetic magic, sympathetic sheep magic, Rachel's 11, whether or not the Holy Trinity tapped, the Biblical version of Death Wish meets Death Wish III.

Hymnal: "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin

Offertory: If you enjoy the show, head to ko-fi.com/apocrypals and send us a love offering! We absolutely appreciate it!