August 12, 2025

276. How to Truly Help the Dementia Caregiver — When You’re Not the One in Charge

12 minutes

Not the decision-maker, still carrying the heartbreak? That’s Helen. She isn’t in the driver’s seat of her sister’s dementia care, yet the weight lands squarely on her heart.

Episode 276 of Dementia Caregiver Support for Christians walks through how to truly help when you’re not the one in charge.

Lizette begins with her coaching prompt to create clarity and direction:

“let’s say it is six months from today and things are easier for you helping your sister and your brother-in-law. What would that look like now?”

From there, the plan is simple, biblical, and doable:

1) Clarify expectations to create peace

“God is not a God of confusion.” Set loving, clear expectations with the primary caregiver. That reduces missed connections and last-minute stress for everyone.

2) Use reminder rhythms that respect the load

Care partners are on duty 24 hours a day. Text a gentle reminder the night before your visit, then a quick confirmation the morning of. Even better, offer a time window that lets the primary caregiver plan a break. This is Therapeutic Truth-Telling™ in action: honest, kind, predictable.

3) Consider a standing slot

If it serves both of you, make it the same time every week. A standing “Mondays 1–5” visit turns your presence into a reliable relief valve, not another spinning plate.

4) Steward your health

Serving while run-down helps no one. Keep your own medical appointments, rest, and nutrition steady so you can show up with calm and care.

5) Ask which model helps most

Drop-ins or scheduled? Let the primary caregiver choose. Either way, you’re building a win-win: time with your loved one and real respite for the one rowing daily.

Ready for more real-time help? Join the next live Ask the Dementia Coach Q and A. You’re not alone, and there’s a clear path forward.

💬 What Do I Say When Dementia Makes Words Hard?

✝️ Speak Calm, Not Just Words

Get “What Do I Say? How to Connect with Your Loved One with Dementia” — a free guide for Christian caregivers navigating confusion, repetition, and emotional moments.

✅ 10 ready-to-use scripts

✅ Rooted in Scripture

✅ Built on the Therapeutic Truth-Telling™ model

📥 Download the guide now: https://www.dementiacaregivingmadeeasy.com/script

🤝 You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

Join other Christian caregivers who are walking this road too — and learning how to care with compassion, clarity, and faith.

👥 Join the free Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dementiacaregiversupportforchristians

🗣️ Ask Your Question Live — and Be Heard

Bring your real-life caregiving questions to Ask the Dementia Coach — our free monthly Q&A session. You’ll get support, clarity, and maybe even be featured on the podcast.

🗓️ Brought to you every month!

🎤 Register here: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/ask

🎓 Want to Reduce Overwhelm Right Now?

Join our free workshop:

How to Immediately Reduce Dementia Caregiver Overwhelm and Stress — in 3 Simple Steps

✅ Practical tools

✅ Faith-informed strategies

✅ Same-day results

🎟️ Reserve your seat: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/wsl

🧭 Still Feeling Stuck?

If you’re wondering what’s underneath your stress, the Caregiver Stress Assessment can help clarify what’s really weighing you down — so you can take your next step with peace.

📊 Take the free assessment: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/dca

❤️ Enjoy This Podcast?

Leave a quick review on Apple or Spotify — it helps other Christian caregivers find encouragement and real help.

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By Lizette Cloete, Christian Dementia Coach

4.9

7777 ratings