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292. How to Keep Connection When Dementia Caregiving Gets Emotional
“Have you ever worried that your loved one is picking up on your emotions, your stress, your lack of sleep—and it makes things worse?” That’s where Helen was before a full day of caring for her sister with dementia. We walked through a calm, honest plan that preserves dignity and steadies the caregiver’s heart.
As I always do, I began with the exact focusing prompt: “If after this weekend, things went well, what would make it easier for you so that we can prepare you for this weekend?” Helen said: “to be able to communicate… affirm what she’s saying… keep her peace so she doesn’t pace.”
1) FAST stroke signs—don’t wait till morning. With recent TIAs, we reviewed FAST: Face droop, Arms drift, Speech/Swallow changes, Time = brain. If you see it, go—don’t “wait and see.” There are two things I never mess with: the brain and the heart.
2) Communicate differently (Therapeutic Truth-Telling™). Keep words gentle and simple; mirror emotion; validate first. Use short cues and “circle back” if she says no—agree when you can, then try again a few minutes later. Measure a good day by presence and peace, not perfect sentences.
3) Plan the day without exhausting yourself. You’re not on duty Thursday night—rest so you can serve Friday. Create low-energy connection: a 15-minute drive, a quick park/ice cream stop, a soft-spoken library visit, short Scripture reading or hymn singing. Use process-of-elimination for needs, and give space when needed.
4) Safety for a flight risk. Talk with the primary caregiver about interior locks or strategies so doors aren’t easily opened; you cannot be on duty 24/7. Identify a backup person you can call if fatigue hits.
Long-term help matters. The caregivers who benefit most join early—steady prayer, coaching, and a place to ask real questions. You don’t have to walk this alone.
Don’t walk alone. The Christian DigniCare Society (lifetime, under $100) gives you community, coaching, prayer, and practical tools.
https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/cds
💬 What Do I Say When Dementia Makes Words Hard?
Get “What Do I Say? How to Connect with Your Loved One with Dementia” — a free guide for Christian caregivers navigating confusion, repetition, and emotional moments.
📥 Download the guide now: https://www.dementiacaregivingmadeeasy.com/script
🤝 You Don’t Have to Do This Alone
Join other Christian caregivers who are walking this road too — and learning how to care with compassion, clarity, and faith.
👥 Join the free Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dementiacaregiversupportforchristians
🗣️ Ask Your Question Live — and Be Heard
Bring your real-life caregiving questions to Ask the Dementia Coach — our free monthly Q&A session. You’ll get support, clarity, and maybe even be featured on the podcast.
🎤 Register here: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/ask
🎓 Want to Reduce Overwhelm Right Now?
Join our free workshop:
How to Immediately Reduce Dementia Caregiver Overwhelm and Stress — in 3 Simple Steps
🎟️ Reserve your seat: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/wsl
🧭 Still Feeling Stuck?
If you’re wondering what’s underneath your stress, the Caregiver Stress Assessment can help clarify what’s really weighing you down — so you can take your next step with peace.
📊 Take the free assessment: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/dca
❤️ Enjoy This Podcast?
Leave a quick review on Apple or Spotify — it helps other Christian caregivers find encouragement and real help.
🎧 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts
View all episodes
By Lizette Cloete, Christian Dementia Coach
4.9
7777 ratings
“Have you ever worried that your loved one is picking up on your emotions, your stress, your lack of sleep—and it makes things worse?” That’s where Helen was before a full day of caring for her sister with dementia. We walked through a calm, honest plan that preserves dignity and steadies the caregiver’s heart.
As I always do, I began with the exact focusing prompt: “If after this weekend, things went well, what would make it easier for you so that we can prepare you for this weekend?” Helen said: “to be able to communicate… affirm what she’s saying… keep her peace so she doesn’t pace.”
1) FAST stroke signs—don’t wait till morning. With recent TIAs, we reviewed FAST: Face droop, Arms drift, Speech/Swallow changes, Time = brain. If you see it, go—don’t “wait and see.” There are two things I never mess with: the brain and the heart.
2) Communicate differently (Therapeutic Truth-Telling™). Keep words gentle and simple; mirror emotion; validate first. Use short cues and “circle back” if she says no—agree when you can, then try again a few minutes later. Measure a good day by presence and peace, not perfect sentences.
3) Plan the day without exhausting yourself. You’re not on duty Thursday night—rest so you can serve Friday. Create low-energy connection: a 15-minute drive, a quick park/ice cream stop, a soft-spoken library visit, short Scripture reading or hymn singing. Use process-of-elimination for needs, and give space when needed.
4) Safety for a flight risk. Talk with the primary caregiver about interior locks or strategies so doors aren’t easily opened; you cannot be on duty 24/7. Identify a backup person you can call if fatigue hits.
Long-term help matters. The caregivers who benefit most join early—steady prayer, coaching, and a place to ask real questions. You don’t have to walk this alone.
Don’t walk alone. The Christian DigniCare Society (lifetime, under $100) gives you community, coaching, prayer, and practical tools.
https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/cds
💬 What Do I Say When Dementia Makes Words Hard?
Get “What Do I Say? How to Connect with Your Loved One with Dementia” — a free guide for Christian caregivers navigating confusion, repetition, and emotional moments.
📥 Download the guide now: https://www.dementiacaregivingmadeeasy.com/script
🤝 You Don’t Have to Do This Alone
Join other Christian caregivers who are walking this road too — and learning how to care with compassion, clarity, and faith.
👥 Join the free Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dementiacaregiversupportforchristians
🗣️ Ask Your Question Live — and Be Heard
Bring your real-life caregiving questions to Ask the Dementia Coach — our free monthly Q&A session. You’ll get support, clarity, and maybe even be featured on the podcast.
🎤 Register here: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/ask
🎓 Want to Reduce Overwhelm Right Now?
Join our free workshop:
How to Immediately Reduce Dementia Caregiver Overwhelm and Stress — in 3 Simple Steps
🎟️ Reserve your seat: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/wsl
🧭 Still Feeling Stuck?
If you’re wondering what’s underneath your stress, the Caregiver Stress Assessment can help clarify what’s really weighing you down — so you can take your next step with peace.
📊 Take the free assessment: https://www.thinkdifferentdementia.com/dca
❤️ Enjoy This Podcast?
Leave a quick review on Apple or Spotify — it helps other Christian caregivers find encouragement and real help.
🎧 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts
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