Topic Lords

346. Adam Doesn’t Want To Get Touchy-Feely With That


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Lords:

  • Ron
    • https://grumpygamer.com/
    • Kevin
      • https://rubixsqube.itch.io/
      • Topics:

        • Do you do easy or hard tasks first?
        • Magic (not the gathering, prestidigitation) as it exists in 2026
        • The thing that makes text adventures interesting
        • The Universe: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack, by Tracy K. Smith
          • https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/55517/the-universe-original-motion-picture-soundtrack
          • Trash vs Treasure: ultra distant galaxies, little red dots, and brown dwarfs
          • Weird hobbies
          • Microtopics:

            • Forgetting what you were going to say about prescription toothpaste.
            • Microsoft Encarta '94.
            • Back when computers were charming.
            • A roguelike where the screen is always scrolling.
            • Doing the hard tasks first so you no longer have to think about them.
            • Trying to cover air quotes audially.
            • Protaskination.
            • Solving a topic for the first time ever.
            • Advertisements for card tricks.
            • Art forms involving lying to people.
            • Nirvana the Band the Show the Movie.
            • Using the language of punctuation to make people lean forward.
            • Donnie Osmond being a jerk.
            • Self-working card tricks.
            • One of the greatest gifts ever given to you by the universe.
            • Winning $6000 in a single spin of roulette and then retiring from gambling.
            • Leaving decks of cards in bars that are 80% the same card.
            • A mail order service that emails you a video of a begloved man preparing your order to ship.
            • Why you own a nine of diamonds single card forcing deck.
            • Video reviews that never discuss or show what the product being reviewed actually does.
            • Dorky magicians in the Youtube era.
            • The text adventure community adopting the Twine community.
            • Zork's physics system and lighting model.
            • A medium in which a single auteur can make a complete work in a few months.
            • The Many Worlds interpretation of Twine adventures.
            • Implementing gamepad controls for a text adventure.
            • Complete inability to drop items in graphic adventures.
            • A Dropping Place.
            • Media in which only the author be clever vs. media in which the consumer can also be clever.
            • The "that doesn't seem to work" response.
            • How you interact with Starship Titanic.
            • Robots saying inscrutable stuff to you.
            • A firm turn-around wrong-way barrier.
            • Keeping the magic of the text parser in your head even as you figure out exactly how it works.
            • A text adventure with auto-complete.
            • Pulitzer-winning poetry about the entire universe.
            • White noise and black noise.
            • The dark we've only ever imagined, now audible, thrumming.
            • Learning how to hear poetry. (Like, at all.)
            • A way of thinking about how the universe was born.
            • Modern jazz as another way of exploring existence.
            • Reading Shakespeare and having to look up "moiety" again.
            • Reading a modern translation of Don Quixote and being annoyed that you can't find a modern translation of Shakespeare.
            • Retreating away from the camera in horror.
            • Unchecked ambition and desire for power.
            • Shakespeare except it's a bunch of lawyers.
            • Romeo and Juliet in the Globe Theater except everybody is shooting each other with guns.
            • Bill and Ted's Excellent Use of Febreeze.
            • JWST images of little weird pimples.
            • Astronomers looking at Interlopers and saying "get this trash out of here"
            • Leaving bugs in your game because they make the game more interesting.
            • There's no such things as trash: it's all treasure to somebody.
            • Throwing a disc up into the fizzlers.
            • Playing a video game and thinking of a way to really fuck your game up and being compelled to find out if the developers thought of it.
            • Always doing exactly what the game tells you not to do.
            • Going to the Sega booth at E3 and playing Sonic as slowly as possible.
            • Playing games in a way that makes the Sega representative come up and talk to you.
            • The production glitches subreddit.
            • Comb filtering.
            • Arguing about whether it's a mistake that you can hear Alanis Morissette inhale.
            • Parts of games that you need to polish and parts you can leave unpolished.
            • Jim's secret to shipping video games.
            • Polishing and honing and perfecting so much that you ruin the finished product.
            • Picking hobbies that don't scale.
            • Eating the top 1000 soups in the history of planet Earth.
            • The kind of person who gets fulfillment out of people appreciating work you've done for them.
            • Letting your wife know that you do have hobbies, actually.
            • The Dead Poet's Society scene about measuring the relative merits of poetry.
            • Jamming on the coffee table synthesizer, and thinking the whole time "I should make a finished song to upload to a web site"
            • Years of meticulous cutting and shaping.
            • Support Topic Lords

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              Topic LordsBy Jim Stormdancer

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