It’s the final Friday of the month, so the gang’s gathered together to make sure we can close the Johnson account with sparkling clean teeth. First, Mike tells us all about his long-awaited trip back to the Pacific Northwest, including an important lesson he learned about traveling with prosthetics. We dig into a bunch of Throw Your Phone submissions that range from questions about different colors of Twitter, to the rodent-ness of rabbits (and their homicidal tendencies), to the desperate need for the return of the TBTL Science Council, to a delightful fantasy of the LRB coven in action. Then we take a look at all the wonderful, wild, mysterious things you guys have purchased using our Amazon affiliate link: ice makers, dirt bikes, tutus, personal creams (earmuffs, kids!), and lots and lots of turkey stew. Bobby ruins his Amazon search history. Meredith scolds the listeners over some dubious health product purchases. Mike loves infomercials’ “before” footage. Ann just wants a water feature, guys.

Important Amazon links:

Want to cool your Diet Coke in a minute flat? Check out the Chill-O-Matic beverage cooler.

Looking to buy four water bottles? Here’s Luke’s preferred model of Klean Kanteen.