This week, Lindy wears a hat!!!!

It’s Hat Girl Summer, and Lindy is patient zero. We know that could be the whole episode, BUT we have business to discuss. We have landed on a name for our $12 Patreon tier. Hint: It’s NOT Big Beautiful Listeners, but you miiiight just see BBL designated to something else in the near future. We love love loved hearing from you all on the Patreon. Never stop pitching us names and your weird little ideas over at patreon.com/textmebackpod!

Next on the docket, we have a Whatcha Watchin’ where Meagan shares her thoughts on Mission Impossible: Final Reckoning. Spoiler: it f*ckin’ ROCKS. Tell us your Tom Cruise trivia and MI thoughts via the BFF Party Phone at (703) 829-0003. 

Strangely, Lindy categorizes yet another worm under the Normal News category instead of Snake of the Week??? What is she trying to say???? Notes app apology in progress?

And finally, it’s Segment Pubes, where Lindy and Meagan process the eldritch horror that is Elon Musk stepping down from his unelected ketamine-drenched government puppet master role. It’s just another week with your BBLs and BBWs. Sign up for the newsletter, subscribe to the Patreon, tell us how you’re processing everything in the world, and always remember: hat.

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Revisit the first appearance of Dr. Freek Vonk and Freekaconda in Lindy and Meagan have Died of Dysentery
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“Inspiring, silly, so good! Thanks Meagan and Lindy. Best podcast ever.”

SHMADS23 **YOU’RE** THE BEST PODCAST EVER!!!!

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• NEWSLETTER ME BACK (A FREE WAY TO SUPPORT THE SHOW!)
• New $12 tier is live! Hop on over to Patreon to check out our new name 💅
• Check out the Text Me Back Venmo!!!
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Important Mormon intel. A correction re: our innate sense of rhythm. The FaT ShoT DruG (that isn’t working). A new installment of Liam Neeson, Help! Lindy has been TAKEN by a Toxic Man: Debit Card Edition. Plus, our buried headline: Meagan’s Wikifeet. Apparently, Meagan has a robust and active page all to herself, leading Meagan to book the first flight available to space with Gayle and the gang to escape this reality. In space, no one can see your feet. 

And fan favorite segment I Can Fix Her is back! Here are our picks of the week!

• Carnation instant Breakfast
• Milk Frother
• International Delight spray cold foam

Special shoutout to listener Hannah! Thank you for sharing your insights into the Mormon Sealing Ceremony! If we could, we’d seal to you right now (non-evil category). Unfortunately, we might want to shoot our shot with that rich Mormon lady and apparently we can only seal to one person 😤 Participation trophy to you tho! 

Speaking of participation, we know we ask for your Patreon dollars often–it’s what helps the show keep going, and what has helped bring back full length video episodes and will continue to help the show grow. But there are free ways to be a part of the community too and we wanted to highlight that! 

• Tell your friends! Send them a little link to the pod and tell them you’re thinking of them? That sounds so nice!
• Leave us 5 stars on Apple and Spotify
• !!!!Sign up for our free newsletter Newsletter Me Back!!!!
• Follow us on IG @textmebackpod
• Subscribe to our Youtube and enjoy our shorts and full vids! 
• Write us a nice review on Apple Podcasts (y’all say some really funny and nice things there and we luv u). Example below <3

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Hop back to our first installment of our Mormon convo in Lindy and Meagan are Scoot Scoot Scootin’ on Heaven’s Door
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“I don't even have the words to describe this podcast because nothing like it has ever existed.”

LULU THE CAT THIS IS SO ACCURATE THANK YOU FOR BEING A PART OF OUR SHARED DELUSION

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• NEWSLETTER ME BACK (A FREE WAY TO SUPPORT THE SHOW!)
• New $12 tier is live! Hop on over to Patreon to help us name it and sign up at any level
• Check out the Text Me Back Venmo!!!
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We would like to humbly announce that we are ✨ready ✨ to accept that Golden Globe for Podcasting despite them not being particularly interested!!! We won’t let that stop us 💫

This week, we are reaching deep into the mail bag. Strangely, all animal-themed (ani-mail bag??). You know us so well! You know who we wish knew us a little less? A problematic little organization that is a homonym of our favorite flatbread. So sorry, Wes, we love those animals but we are not on board with the vibes. Stick to Chimp Crazy babe!

But to cleanse our meaty palates, we get a truly lovely update from listener Elise on her bird friends, a grey catbird (aka Anthony Cosby-Knowles) and a cardinal (dba Guy Fieri) and we have such exciting news…there is a verrry special newcomer, an opossum who is yet to be named! What do you think about the names we suggested? Got any ideas of your own? Toggle over to our Spotify poll or write in with your own on the discord over at patreon.com/textmebackpod.

And our last piece of mail was sent to Meagan’s personal email? No thank you! If you’re pitching us to be a podcast guest to talk about your tarantula antics and criminal charges please use the podcast gmail at [email protected] thank youuuuu! 🕷️

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Enjoy the first installment of Elise’s bird lore in Lindy and Meagan Imagine Dragons Beyond the Flat Earth Ice Wall
• Learn about why we said Sarandos like that in Lindy and Meagan Roll for Charisma
• Our P*TA mention in Lindy and Meagan are OVER the Moon 
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“This shoe is magic. This show is so much more than just two friends being funny and supportive and hilarious and relatable and even more funny. The lore is epic, there are mysteries and songs and snakes! It's really a great time for any lady who knows what it's like to have a psychic link with your bestie. And the Patreon gets you access to a community of cool, cool people who have a great time and now have our own lore! It's really so special, come join us!”

NEL12332232283 WE THINK **YOUR** SHOE IS MAGIC THIS MEANS SO MUCH TO US 🥹🙏

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• New $12 tier is live! Hop on over to Patreon to help us name it and sign up at any level
• Check out the Text Me Back Venmo!!!
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ayyy no Nazi Pope! We’ll never put ketchup on a hot dog again!

We’re on a new beat today called RELIGION 🙏👼

With America’s personality rankings in the toilet, a non-Nazi Pope was anything but guaranteed, but then we find out that our Chicago Pope has been beefing with JD Vance since the inauguration?? Okay, praise Him!! 

And next these BBWs have an important business reminder: we have a brand new Patreon tier coming soon! And did we mention that you get AD FREE episodes as well as secret audio-only eps at our $12 level?? We’re still looking for a name for this tier. DM us on IG @textmebackpod, pipe up in the Patreon discord, or comment wherever, we’ll see it, what the hell else are we doing.

And guess what…we’re also Tiding today! Lindy heads to Santa Fe for a Planned Parenthood Gala and is emotionally accosted by a weird white man. But twist: she stands up for herself by NOT wishing him a good day back 😤. Would YOU call this driver’s manager??? Let us know by giving us a call or text on the BFF Party Phone (703) 829-0003.

And on Meagan’s side of Tidings, we have sad news…no habemus Vespa. She’s scootin’ her way to the heavens to hang out with Pope Francis. Rest in Peace, babe. Mormons or Formans (former Mormans obvi) please pull up and tell us about the afterlife, we need it rn [email protected]

This episode is brought to you by Magic Mind!!! 

Busy day at the conclave? We know one thing will help and her name is Magic Mind 🙏 ✨

Get your Magic Mind subscription here: https://magicmind.com/TEXTMEBACK20

Use code TEXTMEBACK20 for 20% off #magicmind

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“The best podcast of life. Full stop. Thank you Lindy and Meagan for making us laugh each week!!”

TY KAHASEA WE’RE SO GLAD YOU’RE OUT THERE CACKLING ALONG WITH US

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• Get your Magic Mind subscription here: https://magicmind.com/TEXTMEBACK40. You get 40% off with our code: TEXTMEBACK40
• Check out the Text Me Back Venmo!!!
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week, Lindy is dying :/ Bye girl!!!

But the show must go on! So this week we are releasing a very special episode. An abridged semi-exclusive limited release Very Special Episode previously only heard on our Patreon! That’s right. It’s 2 Shrill 2 Furious: Portland Drift—our rewatch series of Shrill. Specifically, we’re talking about the Pool Party episode written by the incredible Samantha Irby. And you’re gonna lose it, but we are joined by NONE OTHER than Sam Irby HERSELF.

We’re talking about fangirling over Mary Cherry aka Leslie Grossman, jokes that were tragically cut, witches that didn’t make the final ep, lines that were all improv, and everything else we could remember about this (don’t mind if we say) honestly iconic episode.

And because we are sneaky little snakes we cut half the content and are reposting the FULL thing on our Patreon as a bid for your wallets! Join us for as little as $1/mo, or as extravagantly as $12/mo. We promise it’s worth it. Hop over there to about Advil lady, crepe truck, Brazilian cheese balls, floormates: Manifest, big boy chair, and earnest thoughts <3 patreon.com/textmebackpod

And in case you didn’t catch that little $12/mo mention…that’s right: new Patreon tier is dropping soon! What should we call the Richie Riche$ who sign up for our $12 tier??? Let us know on the Discord, over email [email protected] or on the BFF Party Phone (703) 829-0003.

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Meet RFK’s brain worm, Janine, in Lindy and Meagan Agree: RFK Jr.'s Brain Worm Is NOT a Girls' Girl!
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“​​If you believe all worms are snakes, this is the podcast for you 🪱”

BRAIN WORMY YOU ARE OUR ONLY DEMOGRAPHIC THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE!!!!!!!

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• Join us on Patreon for the full Pool Party recap ep patreon.com/textmebackpod
• Check out our ongoing Text Me Biki!
• Check out the Text Me Back Venmo!!!
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

We have so many new delights to share with you. First off, we’re GORGEOUS?? Lindy washes her bangs and Meagan is absolutely slathered in rouge. Tune into our socials to see the evidence of this glow-up/looks-maxxing, and let us know if it’s worth all the effort @textmebackpod on IG.  And we also share a BFF endorsement/reunion story that means everything to us!! This is your invitation to send every episode of Text Me Back to your bestie.

Plus, there are some major updates to our Whatcha Watchin’. Lindy is on a new beat called Baldur’s Gate 3, and her reporting doesn’t even make Meagan reach for her dissociation goggles! We stan Toadus with (or without) any shape of peen ✨. Meanwhile, Meagan brings on the sultry magic of icon Luther Vandross. We are GOING TO GINO’S for dinner.

Did YOU give us the famous butter bell or hand-crafted mugs? We want to hear from you (again)! You’re too good to us!!! Write to us at [email protected] or call the BFF Party Phone (703) 829-0003 to tell us who the heck you are, you perfect angels! And if YOU want to get Lindy and Meagan on a Greyhound from New York to LA, here’s how: if we get 50 new Patreon subscribers this week, we’ll friggin do it! www.patreon.com/textmebackpod.

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Listen to all about Lindy’s famous radio personality grandpa in The Killer Comes for Lindy’s Grandpa
• Learn about Meagan’s pickle journey starting here in Lindy and Meagan are even better BBWs in 2025
• I Can Fix Her Segment: Butter Bell edition in Lindy and Meagan Have the Normal Number of Organs
• Meet RFK’s brain worm, Janine, in Lindy and Meagan Agree: RFK Jr.'s Brain Worm Is NOT a Girls' Girl!
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“My favorite podcast!”

MSPERSIMMON YOU ARE A CLEAR AND CONCISE QUEEN AND WE THANK YOU FOR THAT. 

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• Baldur’s Gate 3
• Luther Vandross: Never Too Much documentary trailer
• Luther absolutely wrecking Whitney Houston, Stevie Wonder, and Dionne Warwick in their rendition of That’s What Friends Are For
• Check out our ongoing Text Me Biki!
• Check out the Text Me Back Venmo!!!
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

HOUSTON WE HAVE A PROBLEM! 

GET 👏US 👏OUTTA HERE 👏

Last week dire wolves, this week…Gayle King is in space? You might think that all of the world’s problems have been solved if we’re spending time doing this nonsense–but actually, nope! Believe it or not things are actually worse than ever! The BBWs are losing their minds in real time, but that’s okay because Magic Mind is here to tether them gently to Earth. 

In other news! Barry has tragically been re-coned and Lindy and Meagan are regaled by the horrors of male afflictions. But Meagan visits NYC and her delight in humanity is restored by the bright lights of Times Square and Broadway! What if we kissed at the Times Square Olive Garden 💘🌆🍝

And last but not least: What do you think of Lindy’s Big Static Conspiracy? Ghost of Ben Franklin aka Alexander Graham Bell, that u? Plus, just for 98%ers, you’re in for TWO more unhinged niche conspiracies from Lindy. Get pumped.

This episode is brought to you by Magic Mind!!! 

With the help of these little juices we KNOW where OUR keys are ✨🔑

Get your Magic Mind subscription here: https://magicmind.com/TEXTMEBACK40

Use code TEXTMEBACK40 for getting 40% off your subscription (available only for the first 10 orders)

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Learn what they ACTUALLY put in bully sticks in Lindy and Meagan Start a Wikifeet Retirement Plan! 
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“I'm so grateful to have this hilarious duo in my feed. They remind me of laughing uncontrollably with my BFFs who are far away. These two remind me that we can have joy even as the world explodes.”

ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNAAAAA OUR HEARTS ARE EXPLODING WITH LOVE FOR YOU!

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• Get your Magic Mind subscription here: https://magicmind.com/TEXTMEBACK40. You get 40% off with our code: TEXTMEBACK40
• Gil Scott-Heron’s unfortunately still relevant “Whitey on the Moon”
• Check out the Text Me Back Venmo!!!
• Go see “Oh, Mary!” We’re obsessed. 
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

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If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

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TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hello faithful Text Me Backolytes and welcome new listeners (we’re sorry in advance to newbies! You could not have chosen a more wild starting place, but you’ll catch on fast!). Today Lindy and Meagan kick off with a humble but necessary installment of Department of Corrections: Peter Edition. Apparently one of these colonizing yahoos from last week did, in fact, step foot in Washington State–but don’t worry, we’ve decided to make that one a bonus Q so you can still graduate 8th grade. But the question remains: WHICH Peter from last week is the lucky boy to bless this mess? Tune in to find out.

Then it’s straight into Dog Thoughts, where we learn that Barry is a secret alpha?? You been listening to Joe Rogan, Bar???? Apparently, our gentle copper king does toxic male behavior at a public gathering and no amount of bully sticks–with or without Lindy’s signature flavoring–can calm him down. Meanwhile, back at the Pennsylvanian Dutch Farm that is Meagan’s condo, Kevin screams at ghosts in the living room. The vibes are unwell.

And finally, the most Normalest News: Dire wolves have a moment in the sun before the reality of the situation is understood (GMO wolves are a little less cool to market than Dire Wolves so we don’t NOT get it, but girl we need healthcare so can we focus, or????). And to round out our Normal News segment, Meagan brings us intel that people are body-shaming a mascot. SO NORMAL. Ellie the Elephant, we love you and you owe us NOTHING besides several headstands, fierce braid swings, and a liberal twerking of that ass on that court.

And our 95%ers are in for a treat at the end where Lindy offers an unsolicited rotation of impersonations!!!!! You literally do not have to stick around and we’re flummoxed every time you do!

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Learn what they ACTUALLY put in bully sticks in Lindy and Meagan Start a Wikifeet Retirement Plan! 
• Revisit the first appearance of Dr. Freek Vonk and Freekaconda in Lindy and Meagan have Died of Dysentery
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“This show is a delight and so hilarious. As someone who used to live in both Seattle and DC, I love that Meagan and Lindy make me miss both places.”

FANNTASTIC15 THIS PLACE ISN’T THE SAME WITHOUT YOU COME HOME TO US!

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• Lindy’s conservation BFF Paul Rosolie on IG
• Blood-drinking Anti-anti-aging guy story
• Ellie the Elephant response vid @bigellieliberty 
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)
• Go see our Czar of Sound Force Ahamefule J. Oluo at Madame Lou’s on Thursday 4/17!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

If you thought Lindy’s train adventure was an unhinged delight YOU ARE IN FOR A TREAT. This week it’s Meagan who hits the dusty trail on a trek from Washington, (District of Columbia) to Washington (State). Meagan bravely Dale Coopers her whole ass off with that tiny influencer mic. Along the way she endures a mid-flight beef with her evil auntie doppelganger, being bullied by her brother, and a fight for her life over a Caesar salad.

And not to brag but some pretty good stuff happens along the way too. Meagan learns what the youth are into (Fortnite). We get to hear from iconic BFFs Ingrid and Ella and learn the true meaning of lifelong friendship (matching outfits). And Lindy and Meagan solve a decades-old mystery of The Killer on the Burke Gilman trail (hello, young man 🔪)

You know what they say about Text Me Back Podcast: Come for the skin tags, stay for the Caesar salad!!!! 😵‍💫🫠😎

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• Lindy’s train ep: Lindy and Meagan Choo Choo Choose Chaos
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“good for husbands too!”

VVV000VVV000VVV THANK YOU FOR ENCOURAGING THE HUSBANDS TO TUNE IN! IF YOU ARE A HUSBAND, WE ARE TECHNICALLY MARRIED NOW! 

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)
• Get Hot Pot at Happy Lamb in Bellevue!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This week, Lindy and Meagan submit a heartfelt notes app apology. We are so sorry to all the snakes and worms and devoted listeners out there. To help mend some of these shattered fences, we bring you not just one…but THREE Snakes of the Week 🐍🐍🐍!!! Thank you to a loyal Husband listener Peter for submitting an iconic snake anecdote! 

And next, we are joined by our Pete Hegseth Correspondent Rafil! The emojis and memes are FLYING between Rafil, Jeffrey Goldberg, Pete Hegseth, Vice President J.D. Vance, Lindy, and Meagan. If YOU want to be a part of our BFF war room group chat, let us know! (703) 829-0003.

Then we have a pop quiz! And it’s called “Eighth Grade Washington State History Requirement”

• Did Rear Admiral Peter Rainier ever step foot in Washington State? Y/N
• Did Peter Puget ever step foot in Washington State? Y/N
• Did George Washington ever step foot in Washington State? Y/N
• Did Juan De Fuca ever step foot in Washington State, and while we’re on the topic, is he even a real guy? Y/N

TUNE IN to see if you pass and can graduate eighth grade!!

NEVER LISTENED TO THE POD BEFORE? HERE IS YOUR STARTER KIT TO BEING BFFS WITH US!

• The Ballad of Joel Kim Rooster
• Revisit the first appearance of Dr. Freek Vonk and Freekaconda in Lindy and Meagan have Died of Dysentery
• Or even better, catch our first-ever drop of the Freek Vonk song in Lindy and Meagan Get Drafted
• Meet Kevin in: Lindy and Meagan Need to Talk About Kevin
• Learn why they keep saying BBW in Lindy and Meagan Are Officially BBWs
• Discover the Kayak Dad Lore in: It’s Our First Episode!

WE NEED OUR ACCOLADES! It helps people find the show.

• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Spotify
• ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (5 stars only please) on Apple Podcasts
• Give us Rave Reviews and Accolades on Apple Podcasts! REAL LIFE EXAMPLE:

“Truly addicted to this podcast. Something about it just scratches an itch in my soul, and I love it. I laugh every episode and look forward to every release. So entertaining in a way I can't explain, I have only the purest form of love for this show”

JULIETARI THANK YOU FOR LETTING US ITCH YOUR SOUL SCRATCH 

STUFF TO CHECK OUT:

• Robbed at fang point: python-wielding thieves snatch $400 in CBD oil from Tennessee gas station 
• The Things Around Us by Ahamefule J. Oluo
• Buy the album here!
• The Things Around Us LIVE at Intiman Theater April 24-May 4
• Check out Meagan’s latest installment of SWAMP PERSON
• Subscribe to Lindy’s newsletter butt news!
• Join our Discord! We’re obsessed with these people.
• Check out our MERCH so we can make MORE merch!! (Patrons get a discount, so check us out at patreon.com/textmebackpod)

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

If you like this episode and want us to keep making the show forever, please subscribe to our Patreon. This podcast will always be free, but we need your help to produce it -- and if you support our Patreon, you'll get all kinds of goodies in addition to the show itself! Learn more about the different tiers and rewards here: https://www.patreon.com/TextMeBackPod

Also! Please keep in touch with us! You can text OR CALL us at the Best Friend Party Phone: (703) 829-0003.

We're on Instagram at @textmebackpod!

You can email us at [email protected]!

WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU SO BAD!

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

TEXT ME BACK is a production of Lindy West and Meagan Hatcher-Mays, proud members of the BFF Network. Our senior producer is Meagan Hatcher-Mays. Our other senior producer is Lindy West. Our show is supported by COPILOT Collective and produced by Alli Slice.

Our music is by Chief Ahamefule J. Oluo. Diana Bowen is our video and creative advisor. Our digital strategist is Chance Nichols.

You can also follow the podcast on Instagram and TikTok @textmebackpod. And for even more bestie content, follow Lindy and Meagan on Instagram at @thelindywest and @importantmeagan!

Special thanks as always to our perfect angels: Jeannie Yandel, Brandi Fullwood, and Isolde Raftery.

⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°✩⋆｡°

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.