40 and Infertile - A Fertility Podcast for the 40 and older

Today, we’re discussing international adoption with Karen Snow @infertilitylies.  She tells us about her own infertility story and shares her experience with international adoption.  It’s important to point out that her experience is from the perspective of being a Canadian citizen.  So, if you’re in the US, UK, or Australia where the majority of listeners are listening from, the process is a little different.  You’ll have to check with your local government about which countries there are adoption agreements with.  I’ll put a link in the show notes to some resources.

The first thing to look at might be the Hague convention.  100 nations are a part of the Hague Convention which protects children in the process of intercountry adoption.

I’ve been wanting to speak to an adoption attorney who can speak to adoption both domestically in the US and internationally, but I’ve only been able to locate people who can speak to domestic adoptions.  If this is something you’re interested in as a topic, please reach out to me on Instagram and let me know.

I hope you find this episode helpful!  Of course, if it’s helpful, I’d love it if you could share this with someone who you feel might benefit from it or to leave a 5 star review, so we can help more people learn about ways to expand their family.

Enjoy today’s episode!

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RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

Books mentioned on this episode can be found here:

www.amazon.com/shop/40andinfertile

SPECIAL LISTENER OFFER FOR PRANAMAT: https://pranamat.com/af/ynkjmqzx?coupon=40andinfertile  (CODE: 40andinfertile)

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ABOUT THE GUEST:

Follow Karen Snow, ND:  https://www.instagram.com/infertilitylies/

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ABOUT ADOPTION

Hague Adoption Convention:  https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/Adoption-Process/understanding-the-hague-convention.html

List of Hague Convention Countries:  https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/Adoption-Process/understanding-the-hague-convention/convention-countries.html

US Adoption Service Provider information:  https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/about-adoption-service-providers.html

US Adoption Statistics:  https://travel.state.gov/content/travel/en/Intercountry-Adoption/adopt_ref/adoption-statistics-esri.html?wcmmode=disabled

Today is all about male fertility and infertility with Dr. Samuel Ohlander. I got connected with him because of the amazing Alison Rodgers!  I interviewed her about sperm because she does her sperm Monday videos and I had not yet covered any male factor topics on the show and she graciously accepted my request to review male factor issues.  She casually mentioned Dr. Ohlander’s name during the episode and after the episode I asked if she would be willing to connect me with him and she graciously said yes!!  I’m so BLOWN away by these amazing doctors who respond to me requests and are so kind!!  These people are a special breed!  Dr. Alison Rodgers, Dr. Aimeee Eyvazzadeh the egg whisperer, Dr. Rahi Victory, Dr. Tia Jackson-Bey, Dr. Stephanie Fein, Dr. Jessica Ryneic, Dr. Merhi and of course today, Dr. Samuel Ohlander have all without hesitation accepted my request and have been completely open and willing to answer all and any questions to help this community. If you don’t follow them, go give them some love!  They 100% show up for all of us even when we’re not their patients and it’s just so heartwarming to me. I’ll tell you, connecting with experts for the podcast is so difficult. These kind souls make it so easy!  Thank you to everyone who has also tried to connect with work specialists. I’m still looking to interview a reproductive immunologist and an endometriosis specialist!  So, if you have anyone you’re connected with who can then connect me, it would be so great!!

Okay.  That was a bit of a tangent. I just thought that was important to thank these really awesome humans for educating us and bringing us this information.

Today, Dr. Ohlander spends a ton of time breaking down male fertility and infertility with us.  We talk about the most common topics in male infertility and what exactly a male reproductive urologist is and when to see one.  Dr. Ohlander does such a great job breaking down a lot of these topics that might be a bit of a mystery.  Like low testosterone, but also taking testosterone decreases male fertility, so what do you do?

Thank you so much to Dr. Ohlander for spending so much time with us breaking these topics down for us.  He has agreed to come back and go into detail about another topic, so if male factor infertility is something that you’re dealing with, let us know what topics you want us to cover!  You know the drill!  If you loved today’s episode, leave review and share.

Okay, let’s get started!  Enjoy today’s episode!

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE

Books mentioned on this episode can be found here:

www.amazon.com/shop/40andinfertile

Dr. Samuel Ohlander: https://www.fcionline.com/dr-samuel-ohlander-2

To book an appointment with his office call: 877-934-3111

Dr. Allison Rodgers Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/dr.allison.rodgers/

Episode 19 with Dr. Allison Rodgers:  https://open.spotify.com/episode/3E7VMpCrYiv6eQx4WhcpA2?si=MN_Zo-L1SoC7GjUzdMs9VA

Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh:  https://www.instagram.com/eggwhisperer/

Dr. Rahi Victory:  https://www.instagram.com/rahivictory.md/

Dr. Tia Jackson-Bey:  https://www.instagram.com/drtiajacksonbey/

Dr. Stephanie Fein:  https://www.instagram.com/stephaniefeinmd/

Dr. Jessica Ryneic:  https://www.instagram.com/jessicaryniecmd/

Dr. Zaher Merhi:  https://www.instagram.com/dr_merhi/

Today is all about genetic testing - so, what I mean about all about genetic testing is we talk about inherited diseases, genetic differences and embryo testing.

Admittedly, I’m clueless when it comes to this.  I don’t know anything about this which is why I have Meghan, who is a genetic counselor here to break everything down.  The most awesome thing about Meghan is that she makes these really complicated topics super easy to understand.

In other exciting news, I have a couple of volunteers helping me thanks to some very generous people and donations!  Thank you to everyone who is supporting this show.  I’m so grateful for you all for being here.  What I’m trying to do is to include time stamps for each episode so that if you prefer, you can jump to the area of your choice to listen.  I hope this makes it easier to find the information you want.  I hope to have a website up to categorize these episodes and topics so that you can more easily search for what you’re looking for, but that’s going to take more time and donations to complete.  It’s all a work in progress, so thank you all for helping me!  I’m so grateful!!!

Okay, let’s get to it.

Books mentioned on this episode can be found here:

www.amazon.com/shop/40andinfertile

Website:  www.dnaide.com

Connect with Meghan:  https://www.instagram.com/meaghandoylegc/

SUPPORT THE PODCAST:

https://www.buymeacoffee.com/40andinfertile

Today we have a very real discussion about multiple pregnancy losses, miscarriage, endometriosis, adenomyosis, infertility and finding our voices.  Meghan offers you her perspective and experience with infertility.  She is just so smart, kind and open with how she feels about her experience.

I really hope you enjoy this episode.  Please drop that 5 star review and written review, it would really help share these stories to a bigger audience.  If you loved this episode, I would also love it if you could share this show with others you think might benefit from the information I provide here.

We had so much fun talking, which means this is a nice long episode.  Get comfortable because here we go!

Books mentioned on this episode can be found here:

www.amazon.com/shop/40andinfertile

To connect with Meghan:  https://www.instagram.com/for_the_barreness/

Her website can be found here:  https://www.forthebarreness.com/

TIME STAMPS:

Breakdown of topics covered: 1:20

Disclaimer: 4:38

Introduction of Guest (Meghan Faith): 5:10

Meghan Faith Self Introduction: 6:06

Meghan Faith Fertility History: 9:48

Miscarriage: 11:15

Endometriosis, Adenomyosis, Müllerian Anomaly Diagnosis: 25:30

IVF: 28:12

Self Advocating: 31:20

First IVF Experience: 39:57

Sacrifice Does Not Equal Success: 42:55

Infertility is not our Identity: 47:00

Laparoscopy: 49:24

Therapy: 52:44

Instagram and Friendships: 57:54

Comparison and Jealousy: 1:01:23

Family & Friend Support and Relationships: 1:07:00

Most Difficult Part of Infertility: 1:14:07

Top 5 Tips for Someone Going Through Infertility: 1:15:30

Positive Things to Come from Infertility: 1:19:08

Relationship with your Fertility Doctor: 1:22:55

Questions: 1:29:11

How to Connect with Meghan: 1:53:23

Today is another episode about surrogacy, but with a twist.  Today, we speak to both an intended parent and a surrogate to tackle all of your questions about surrogacy.

We talk about the surrogate process from start to finish, but we also talk about some of the challenges of navigating this relationship.  There are a lot of intricacies in building this really special relationship and we talk about some of these challenges today.

I do have other episodes about surrogacy.  You can check out episode 15 with Monica of @waitingforbabywunder and episode 17 with @christinawangdmd to learn more about surrogacy from the intended parent side.  We also have a brief discussion about legal considerations in episode 27 with a fertility focused attorney.

You guys know the drill, drop some 5 star love if you dug this episode and leave a written review.  Shoot me a DM on Instagram with suggestions for future episodes!  Otherwise, let’s get to it!

RESOURCES FROM THIS EPISODE:

Books mentioned on this episode can be found here:

www.amazon.com/shop/40andinfertile

The Biggest Ask Website:  https://thebiggestask.com/

The Biggest Ask on Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/thebiggestask/

Ashley on Instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/surrogacyofhope/

TIME STAMPS:

Breakdown of Topics Covered: 0:30

Other Episodes about Surrogacy: 2:03

Disclaimer: 4:05

Introduction of Guests (MJ and Ashley): 4:34

MJ Self Introduction/Fertility History: 5:57

Ashley Self Introduction/Surrogacy History: 20:49

Relationship Between Surrogate and Intended Parents: 24:47

Difference Between an Independent Journey and Using an Agency: 30:01

Costs of Surrogacy: 31:24

What a Surrogate Looks for in an Agency: 41:34

What to Look for Matching with a Surrogate: 44:08

What to Look for Matching with an Intended Parent: 48:38

Relationship After the Birth: 55:36

How a Surrogate can Support an Intended Parent: 57:30

Birth Order: 1:02:16

What Happens After a Match: 1:04:14

Pregnancy Test - Sharing Results: 1:10:48

After a Positive Test: 1:12:23

What you Wish You Knew (Intended Parent): 1:16:17

What you Wish You Knew (Surrogate): 1:19:46

Questions: 1:24:02

Dispelling the Myth: The Surrogate Wants to Keep the Baby 1:36:53

Egg Donor Vs Surrogacy: 1:41:35

Finding the Silver Lining: 1:43:20

How to Connect with MJ & Ashley: 1:50:08

Today, we have episode 30 with Infertility Man Jon Summers.  I first heard about Jon after I saw a repost talking about male factor infertility.  He was a voice for those who were male and going through infertility.  It got me thinking that I had not covered any topics on male factor infertility and I had not had many male voices speaking about their experiences with infertility.  So, I reached out to Jon.  Jon was so kind to respond quickly and even though he’s in Australia, we were able to make the time work out.

If you think today’s episode is just for the males in your life, you’re wrong.  He talks about adversity, relationships, the struggle of a cancer diagnosis, the struggle of infertility, and how to talk about it.  It really is a great episode for both men and women to listen too.

If you found value in this episode, I’d love a 5 star review or a written review to help get this into more ears.  If you have a suggestion for future episodes, reach out to me on Instagram  at 40 and Infertile.

Thank you for being here!  Let’s do this!

Books mentioned on this episode can be found here:

www.amazon.com/shop/40andinfertile

Pre Order Jon and Laura’s book here:  http://www.infertilityman.com/shop/store-with-sidebar/books/the-mans-guide-to-infertility/

Follow Jon and Laura here:  https://www.instagram.com/infertilityman/

Infertility Man Videos::  http://www.infertilityman.com/videos/guess-what-we-are-infertile/

Men’s Infertility Group on Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/groups/themensinfertilitygroup

Dr. Vicki Chan, MD, is an ophthalmologist and fellow infertility warrior.  Today, she shares her own infertility story and some of the struggles of building a career while expanding her family.  We discuss the demands that may come with a profession like medicine, how to deal with the expectations that come with that career, and how to ultimately find a work-like balance.  She shares all the things she's learned along the way.  She has some advice to share if you're someone with a highly demanding career or know that your job will take time to build.  

Resources:

https://www.instagram.com/vickichanmd/

Chiemi and I were brainstorming about what we could talk about on the episode and we decided that it was important to share what was normal to experience emotionally and mentally during this process as well as how to quiet expectations of either ourselves or the expectation of others.  So, we talk about that that means when you’re working with colleagues or have demanding family members or what it means when you’re just struggling to cope.  I think just listening to Chiemi talk, you’ll understand what a gift she has in this space for understanding what it’s like to go through what we go through. She just has this ability not only to understand you, but to make you feel so safe when you’re talking to her.  I think if you’re going through this having someone who “gets it” I mean, really gets it is so key to getting through this easier.  It doesn’t mean you won’t struggle.  It means that when you do struggle, you have a really strong pillar to lean on.  If you’re really struggling, please remember that in the US, the suicide prevention hotline can be reached by dialing 988 and help is available for you.

If you found value in our conversation today, please share this episode and leave a 5 star review or a written review on whichever platform you’re listening on.  This really helps this podcast reach more people.  I recently found out this hit 10,000 downloads, which is crazy to me.  Thank you all for being here!  I’m so grateful for everyone being here!  As always, please don’t hesitate to reach out!  I’m happy to explore topic ideas for future episodes!!

Okay, you guys.  It’s time to chat with Chiemi!  Let’s go.

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

Work with Chiemi:  https://missconceptioncoach.com/

Follow Chiemi:  https://www.instagram.com/missconceptioncoach/

Follow LuckyBabyLam:  https://www.instagram.com/luckybabylam/

Listen to LuckyBabyLam on Spotify:  https://open.spotify.com/episode/7uZdrU7RkXyxM0ELayD9ee?si=C4IXX455RJ6Ssvs7H2u8aw

Listen to LuckyBabyLam on Apple Podcast:  https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/episode-12-warrior-story-the-infertility-journey/id1612840924?i=1000558474830

Today's episode is around legal considerations with fertility treatments or fertility preservation.  Rijon joins us today to tell us when we need a lawyer and the things we should think about during our fertility treatments.  Come listen to see how or if a fertility attorney can help you!  

Resources:

More about Rijon:  https://sunrayfertility.com/about/

Connect with Rijon:  https://www.instagram.com/sunrayfertility/

Another Warrior who underwent laparoscopy:  https://www.instagram.com/healthyivf/

This is episode 26 and it’s another Warrior Story.

Today, our focus is going to be the emotional ride of infertility over 40 as well as seeking treatment outside of the US.

I wanted to talk to Emily because she has a unique point of view being a therapist.  I think that it’s important to point out that even though she has all the skills and tools to help others who are struggling and grieving, she also struggled.  I think this speaks volumes to the magnitude of the pain that we go through and experience.  So, if you’re struggling, you’re not odd because it seems like everyone else is doing ok.  It might seem like that because we’re all putting on a show for everyone else around us!  This is one of the reasons I wanted to create this space.  This space is safe for you to be angry and safe for you to be sad, safe for you to be jealous.  Safe for you to feel all the feelings, but I do want to say that you should have help and if you really are having a hard time. Now, if you really are having a really really hard time, please get help.  You can get help by dialing 988.

You guys know the drill, if you loved this episode or found value in it, I would love for you to leave a 5 star review on whichever platform you’re listening on.  I want this information to get to as many people struggling with infertility as possible so their paths aren’t as heartbreaking or difficult as they were for some of us.

Let’s chat with Emily!

Resources:

https://www.instagram.com/infertile_therapist_in_therapy/