September 07, 2020

46. Fetch Me A Renaissance Italy Nostalgia!

1 hour 3 minutes

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Lords:

Elena plugs whale sharks.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whale_shark

Good whale shark faces:

https://www.businessinsider.com/whale-shark-was-caught-on-camera-trying-to-mate-2019-7

https://www.livescience.com/55412-whale-sharks.html

Kappa is Kappa on glowfic.com and viniferavaria on Twitch.

https://www.twitch.tv/viniferavaria

Topics:

Whale sharks.

Ask Me About My Bizarre Quasi-Fanfiction (Animorphs/Madoka thematic fusion, sword of truth retake, lilite satanist narnia...)

Did you see that video where the Super Monkey Ball superfan went on a quest to find the narrator's voice actor?

Quest to find narrator: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=inUkotGb-K4

A supposed new SMB game: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gA4bjZm902c

A ZZT community member recreated the lost ZZT source code from scratch and it compiles to a byte-identical executable

https://blog.asie.pl/2020/08/reconstructing-zzt/

Josh asks "https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kuai_Kuai_culture"

Van Halen and the brown M&Ms http://www.compliancebuilding.com/2009/08/03/compliance-van-halen-and-brown-mms/

Bug reports and changelogs from video games that are just close enough to real life to be surreal

Microtopics:

The whale shark's incredibly silly face.

Lilite Satanist Narnia.

The Satanist version of what Narnia is to Christians and Golden Compass is to atheists.

Telling your best friend about the magical key you just found and going off together to have adventures.

Suddenly becoming monarch of a place you've never heard of and having to set policy when you're thirteen years old and have never taken an economics class in your life and also it's a magical kingdom so it uses magic economics anyway.

Building a paradise for people against their will.

Seeing enough sexism that you have to invent a splinter sect to get rid of it.

Nostalgic fiction from people with really weird backgrounds.

An 80s-ass computer terminal with an extremely full ashtray next to it.

Nostalgia for 16th century Polynesia.

Second-hand nostalgia.

Going on a quest to find the voice actor of a beloved video game.

Whether or not Sega is currently producing another Super Monkey Ball.

Whether or not you should monkey some balls.

Turning dials at the edge of a board and a ball bearing falls into a hole.

Going into the recording both with no context for the lines you are about to read.

Actors reading individual lines in a vacuum rather than reacting to each other.

Not having a good way to order the lines in your branching script so you deliver the lines to the actor in alphabetical order.

Using CD audio to store your sounds so you can only have 99 individual things you can play.

The last of the Guild of Weavers.

All the adults getting turned into swans and flying away.

An adventure game where you play a sequence of notes to select a verb.

Not having perfect pitch but being glad that there is a game mode for people who do.

Trying to summon a demon from beyond time.

Escaping reality with the other Weavers and all your friends are horrifically murdered and their ghosts are angry at you.

Pointing a decompiler at the game and typing in Pascal until it basically matches.

Comparing two executables by loading them both in a decompiler, rapidly switching between the windows and looking for differences on the screen.

Using the decompiler released by the NSA to reverse engineer ZZT, so you know the NSA must've reverse-engineered ZZT internally decades ago.

Whether or not the ZZT source code was lost in an interesting way.

How ZZT and Unreal were both sold as a video game but really the part people were interested in was the level editor.

More man-hours than a man has.

MMO developers releasing the client source code but not being allowed to release the server source code.

Nobody wanting to port a million line code base to another language.

Doing your best to elide over the more boring details.

Fixing about 30 complier errors and getting about another 30 because the compiler doesn't have great error recovery.

Going back to Flickr to find even higher resolution photos of bugs having sex.

Changing all the stars on the American flag to bugs.

What was going on in France.

How to fix the problem when your game is crashing in France.

One browser interpreting your integer as a percentage and the other interpreting it as a decimal.

Upending all of science because it's easier than disabling auto-formatting dates in Excel.

Approaching a project with the design goal of being as outrageous as possible.

Playing a game where you're unsure whether the time it crashed was intentional.

The rigid set of best practices for using snack foods to ensure machinery keeps working correctly.

The Van Halen brown M&M story as a conscientiousness filter.

That time Van Halen refused to play because there were brown M&Ms backstage and also the stage wasn't strong enough to hold all their equipment.

Rules that exist mostly as a way to determine how much the participant cares about being a good member of the community.

Forgetting your girlfriend's birthday and going back in time to get her a present.

Spending all day evaluating your list of people you might want to castrate.

Satanists ritually sacrificing themselves.

Being attacked by necromantically re-animated yak hooves and hair.

Your memories of seeing a lovely waterfall being amputated and necromantically re-animated and trying to drown you and it's extremely unclear how to kill the memory of a waterfall.

The process of getting dwarves to a place where they can do dwarf stuff.

Sadness that the badgers never made it into Faeries vs. Badgers.

A son waking up any minute now.

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By Jim Stormdancer

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