i’ve been leaning into relinguishing power over things recently that i once would have preferred to have more control over. not resisting when the universe acts upon me. and although things may not be going quite how i would like them to, i wouldn’t change it. let’s see where else this goes yah? DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Helvetia “Hanging In A Car” Fantastic Life 01:41 Green-House “Perennial Bloom” Six Songs for Invisible Gardens 04:25 Al Riggs “real repent pt. 2” ganglian 08:19 The Tissues “Salt Shaker” Blue Film 10:58 aric “An Afternoon! (w/ Alex)” Aric & Friends 13:26 Liz Costello “Something Tells Me” At All Times Remain 17:38 Kolb “Rose Garden Strategy” Rose Garden Strategy 20:00 SUN ARAW “PEG” DX CLASSICS 23:55 Flying Fish Cove “Magic Wand” Magic Wand 26:35 Crisco Dreams “Ann Marie” Lovegrams 30:02 Fire Roast “Smash” FIRE ROAST 32:57 Nina Ryser “Sore Reminder” Laughing Tears 34:30 Mamalarky “Mama’s Bear” Fundamental Thrive Hive 37:27 Dubble Trouble “Part Eight” Dubble Trouble 40:59 Granite to Glass “A Light” A Light | Dusk 43:13 Poppy Patica “Theo” State of Nothing 46:05 Mr. Wrong “Not For You” Create A Place 47:28 Zach Phillips “Falling” Bezoar 49:00 The Serfs “Persona Non Grata” Sounds of Serfdom 51:58 Violet Mice “These Years” EVERYTHING IS ALWAYS BAD

i went to an estate sale last weekend and i bought two jars of rubber bands. one had red rubber bands. the other had green rubber bands. they were so neatly organized. so pleasing to look at. someone, and presumely this person is now dead, took the care to organize these jars of rubber bands and i knew immediately that i had to have them. it was sunday and in the last hour of the estate sale. everything was cheap and whatever was left over was probably destined for the landfill. is it my job to save all the treasurers of the recently deceased? no. but maybe. and i’ve saved other objects before. notebooks. homemade fridge magnets. odd collections of useless items. at least, the items are useless to me, but they were meaningful to someone. and that’s what draws me to them. i hope that some day someone decides that my trash is worth preserving. and in that trash, i will live forever. DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Surface to Air Missive “Monster’s Mouth” Shelly’s Gone 02:34 Erika Bell “Whales” Precept 07:10 GOMME “Floss” Absent Healing 10:31 J.F. Sebastian “Introducing the Losers” J.F. Sebastian 12:59 FLOOR CRY “i’m not usually like this” strawberry milkshake 15:51 thanks for coming “10:19” adding up 20:40 Rachel Toups “Breaking” Sundog 22:35 Black Opal “Contract” Babylon Disco 24:44 Jib Kidder “Knock Knock” Pay 2 Play 28:42 Mister Baby “Warm Body” There’s Hope in Cantelope 30:57 ron shalom “Wishing Well” Weight Of The Water 34:35 Carla Sagan “Water Planet” billions and billions of songs 38:24 Dories “Chorus” Old Songs 42:50 Field Guides “Lucky Star in the A.M.” This Is Just A Place 46:42 PLATTENBAU “Straight Arrow” Straight Arrow / No More 50:15 Plastic Bubble “Say Won’t Do” The Sitting in a Tree EP 51:53 Wolfgang Strutz “NEEEDS” fourth house 54:43 Judge Russell “You Don’t Wanna Go Back” 1000 Breakfasts With You 57:41 bigfoot “hot 2 the core” bigfoot 58:44 Short Fictions “Fates Worse Than Death Pt II: Anthropocene” Fates Worse Than Death

my mom gets so sad when she sees holes in my clothes. i have these favorite boots, and they both have holes in a spot where it makes sense for them to wear out with regular use but the rest of the shoe still works fine i think. but mom gets so bummed when she sees them. she’s like “what did i do to deserve this?” and “oh god, what did i do wrong?” even though i’m like a pretty okay person and do some cool things in this world, and my shoes have nothing to do with her. is this just a common mom reaction? or like, an immigrant parent thing? i did a lot of research the past couple months and got a nice new backpack because my backpack was also one of the items that made my mom sad. and yah, i agree that it was disgusting, but it still worked fine. but i showed my mom my new backpack tonight and she was so happy. i’ve been looking forward to showing it to her. and i’m going to try really hard to keep it nice, though often life happens so no guarantees. mom loved the backpack but told me i still better not wear the shoes with holes next time i see her hahaha. i’m 37 and i wonder about if/when any of this will change with age. like, at some point will i start caring about whether my clothes have holes in them? would it have happened already if it was going to? or, will my mom stop caring about whether my clothes have holes in them? generally i don’t understand how age works and what if i never have kids of my own? will i just be treated like a child forever? or, for those of you with kids, do your parents still infantilize you anyway? obviously all parent-child relationships look different, but i just don’t feel like i have any reference points. mom, i know you see these posts and i love you and i know that we share many of the same values. and i don’t want to ever make you sad. and i will try to remember to wear a costume if you need me to but i will also continue to challenge you because i think that, too, can mean love. DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Fitness Womxn “easy” New Age Record 02:36 Jacob Sachs-Mishalanie “Dance” Black Garden OST 05:04 Soft Fangs “Joy Ride” Drawing Heaven from Memory 08:02 James Aranda “Floating Down the River” Heavy Meadow 11:06 Nightmom “So Hot (Live @ The Biko Garage)” Drain Diaries 13:04 Ted Taforo “Computers” BETWEEN DREAMS 15:23 ylayali “man in the box” today 19:32 Mid-Air Thief “Gameun Deut” Crumbling 24:35 Jason Anderson “Little Things” Winter Songs IV 26:20 Good Doom “ongoing leisure revolution” Ongoing Leisure Revolution 29:27 Yeehaw Junction “Silverado” Demo 31:57 The Expos “Sweet” Flavor City 33:42 Worm Cafe “walk out” fantasies / walk out 36:29 Abronia “New Winds for the Warming Sands” The Whole of Each Eye 42:31 Mooey Moobau “Two One-Legged Man” Powder, and All That Store-Bought Hair 45:16 Treadles “Skin Crawls” And The Rocks And The Trees And The Empty Air Between 47:27 Throwaway “Exotic Bird” WHAT? 50:15 GEE TEE “Chromo-Zone” Chromo-Zone 51:42 Nag “A freeze” Red Panda 53:15 Anna Vo “Everlasting Glow” VO // I call upon the dead to rise SP 57:13 nine of swords “daylight” you will never die 58:55 Banafsh “MOTHER OF SIGHS” THE THREE MOTHERS 61:09 Prism “Lust and Trouble” Demo 63:47 L.U.S.T. “Dark Place” Life Under Systemic Terror 66:12 Happy and You Know It “Days Roll By” Mechanism

i hate the way wearing a mask makes an indentation in my beard. and then my beard looks weird until i shower and brush it out. and so sometimes i’ve not been wearing a mask indoors. like, when i know i’m going to be inside the store for a short time i just go without. but i’ve been thinking about how dumb that is. the vanity part. but like, being vain about something that i’m sure other people find gross hahaha. it doesn’t make sense. so i’ve been thinking about trimming my beard and keeping it trimmed. this probably seems trivial to you, but it feels like a big decision to me. i’ve had a full natural for like 18 years. that’s half my life. but if it’s causing me to take risks, then maybe it’s worth a trim? DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Sylvia Wrath “today, for now” really big picture 03:28 Thunder Thighs “Lucky” Sugar 08:48 Karen Meat “I Made You a Card” Meat Your Heart Out 11:08 Karl Blau “Gone With The Wind” If There Is A Guard Above 14:30 Soursob “Gizmo” Soursob EP 17:05 SCULLY “You Warm Me” Encounters 20:20 Celestial Shore “Not Dummy” Sunnyland 22:48 cal fish “Boom Cat” Sound States for Myssi 28:48 Dale “Rotating Speed Wheels of Doom on a Metal Frame” Suffocated by the Putrid Stench of Friendship 29:30 Honey Oat “Wonder In Sights” Honey Oat 32:27 Planted “Mariah” Mystic Daisy 35:42 Oh Foot “Argonautica” MYTHOS 38:58 Land N Sea “Jet Plane” Mid Drift 41:58 Lauren Abineri “Home Song” Everything That I’ve Stolen 46:26 Jeremy Wuan “MORE THAN PROBABLY” WHOLE WORLD SINGS 48:32 Scoutmaster “december” winter ache 50:05 Petrillo “Sweet and Tasty” Ding-a-ling 52:38 DARK THOUGHTS “Do You Dream” MUST BE NICE 53:56 Wednesday “Winn-Dixie” yep definitely 56:48 TAWINGS “Suisen” TAWINGS

i’ve been doing religion a little bit recently. well, not religion but ritual. it’s been a way to share a cultural experience i had as a kid with friends who had other experiences. and to connect and commiserate with friends that have had similar experiences. and maybe it’s also been an attempt at reclaiming the years of my life going through (what i’ve learned as i reflect were) meaningless ritual. family time felt significant but the rituals feel meaningless devoid of any larger critical context. i’m very very thankful to folks who have written thoughtful and radical haggadot. here’s the anti-zionist haggadah we used for passover this year: bit.ly/40xX3d0. this isn’t a part of my life i’m looking to cultivate much more than an excuse to prepare a seder and make and share food with friends a few times a year, but reflecting on my position as an american jew while palestinians live under violent occupation in my name can be a daily ritual. DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 NOTCHES “Funny How” New Kinda Love 02:50 Shannon Lay “Blue” Blue 08:36 Winter “I Feel” Hazy 11:32 Unclaimed Diamonds “Sick Slab” The First Five Slabs 13:14 Chris Weisman “Welcome To Reality Smith” Billy Don’t Pawn Your Horn 16:43 a certain smile “Honey Do” BAE 19:08 Cochonne “OMEGA” COCHONNE 20:36 iji “I Don’t Ever Wanna Go Back” iji 24:57 Squirt “Sad Year” Ruff Start EP 28:13 Trust Fall “Calmed Storm” Bloodstream EP 31:09 Jib kidder “CNN” Sums 34:00 The Buk Buk Bigups “Last Load” Big Big Fuckups 36:41 Era Bleak “Tinderbox” Demo 2017 38:06 Dust from 1000 yrs “three” Life and Death in a World Without Words 41:24 Feeble “Stratford” Growing Out Of Touch 44:16 Little Gunpowder “Regrets” Don’t Fall Asleep 46:31 Novopain “Living” Novopain 48:28 The Fragiles “Long Arms” The Fragiles 51:11 unlimited guests “rivers casino” cauldron 52:48 Cold Beat “She’s Invisible Now” A Simple Reflection

i wrote a whole thing but i deleted it. the words in your head feel so important one moment and so trivial the next. i’m going to try to spend my day outside. minimal words. and maybe i’ll come back to it another time. byeeee! DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Cool Original “Never Stop Hanging Out” I Never Said I Didn’t Care 03:25 Lomelda “Too Bright” They Can’t Sing Like Me 06:11 VVD WNDWS “The Sad Poetry of Violence” Blue Landscape 08:25 4th Curtis “Nonstop” Invisible Ax 12:11 Dig Nitty “Angel Calling” Cold Gold 15:31 Chain “Tiny” Chain 17:00 Milk Flud “Control Freak” Supportive Nature 20:09 American Grandma “Forrest” Superdog 24:19 WET FRUIT “Water” WET FRUIT 27:16 Ducks Unlimited “Get Bleak” Get Bleak 30:18 Buffet Lunch “Hotel At The End Of The Universe” Snap EP 33:00 Jetstream Pony “I Close My Eyes” I Close My Eyes / It’ll Take More Than a Friday 35:29 Dragnet “Delicate” All Rise For Dragnet 37:02 Shake the Baby Til the Love Comes Out “The Only Good Cop” Growth and Healing Through Bringing Others Down 40:32 Lately Kind of Yeah “Star” Uncurse 42:55 Brunch Club “Logan” Another Wasted Summer 44:51 Scott & Charlene’s Wedding “Boundary Line” When in Rome, Carpe Diem 48:44 The Finks “I’ll be your baby tonight” Affectations 52:27 Special Moves “I Don’t Have Any Other Words” Everything Is Free 53:47 Jon Bafus “Pit 9” PUSH / PULL 55:59 Nesey Gallons “PATSY CLINE” BLACK MOUNTAIN RETURN 59:24 Beverly Tender “Leaky, omnipresent voice in the sewers. An Instruction. A Recipe?” Little Curly/boy is a Bird 62:42 Kolb “Long Coat” Going Places 64:18 Woolen Men “Space Invader” Human To Human 66:43 Fauvely “What the Living Do” This is What the Living Do

i went to a book sale today and i judged all the books by their covers. or more specifically, their spines. i chose the books based on the lettering on their spines and i guess we’ll see how it goes! but wow, ugh, some book covers are so ugly. i’m just hoping that if i’m drawn to the aesthetic of the cover art then i may be drawn to the content or style of writing? i judge people based on their aesthetics also (it’s a shortcut we all take, yah?) but it gets confusing because of places like urban outfitters and also because some of my favorite people have truly upsetting fashion sense. but like books, and people, i love a good recommendation. that way i don’t have to make time-saving judgements based on aesthetics. so what/who would you recommend to me? DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Valley Gals “Come Over” Real Rock 01:24 Post Moves “Cerulean” No Dignity in Haste 04:56 ITCHY BUGGER “Baker Man” Done One 07:18 Crisman “Rock” Crisman Tape 09:32 Xenia Rubinos “DIOSA” DIOSA vs. BUGEISHA 12:17 Gutter Girls “Love Song” Gutter Girls EP 13:59 Mister Goblin “Calendar Dogs” Is Path Warm? 18:09 Paperman “fool zero” cherry brain 21:37 Overwhelmed “Thirty Five” Who Rules The World? 23:58 Les Halles “Golden Hour V-VI” Golden Hours 26:19 Sondra Sun-Odeon “Oaks” Desyre 29:16 franz murder “a dreamlike place…” brat school 32:19 Post/Boredom “Everything Avoider” Ritualistic Time Abuser 35:19 Tara Jane O'Neil “The Crying Game” Songs for Peacock 38:57 2 Chevrons “Disappear” No Rules In Outta Space 41:49 PickleBoy “downer days” taking care 43:45 P.P. Rebel “Where The Quiet Go” P.P. Is… Peeping Piebald Past The Night! 46:37 Gentleman Surfer “J.L. Pluckin” Point Bag 50:51 Liquids “Don’t Wanna Get To Know You” 2 Soft Serves and a Hard Rock 53:07 BOBBY WOULD “Bad Man (I’m Not A)” Baby 56:18 Lux “Combat” New day 58:02 Justus Proffit “Spirit” Return 2 Zero 59:46 Ora Cogan “Moonbeam” Crickets 62:57 Shannon Lay “Something On Your Mind” August 64:58 Girl Ray “Because” Girl

it’s been a few months since i broke up with my therapist and i’ve been doing pretty well. really well, actually. there are some things that it would be nice if they were going a little differently but none of them are high anxiety situations. everything has been manageable. i’ve been able to check in with people when i have something to think through. i don’t feel like i’m holding too much in - just enough. i’m not feeling too stressed. my days are full and i’m having a nice time. i’m not sure how to account for it all. like, i want an explination. why. but maybe that’s all it is. i ride this moment and if things change i adjust. and that will be fine. i wore white pants all day yesterday. i can do anything. DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 House Deposit “Cruise Control” Reward For Effort 03:15 LAPS “Not Often” Soon Not Often In It 05:53 little champion “i saw yr boat” Curiosity 08:50 Crissy Bell “A Little Love” Weakness 13:25 Alpha Error “Soft Boycott” i 16:29 ALIEN NOSEJOB “Cabanossi” HC45 7" 18:09 Noxeema “Red Line” NOXEEMA 19:30 Eggy “Bar Fred” Billy 22:02 Sipper “N.J.F.D.” Adam Driver EP 24:11 Buni Hate Mail “Soup” Chain Mail 27:37 Lande Hekt “Gigantic Disappointment” Gigantic Disappointment 30:39 PYNKIE “Shrinking Violet” neoteny 33:00 Lovelet “Tusks” couple’s fight night 36:05 Sunglaciers “Through the Screen” Foreign Bodies 38:06 Warsh “Brat” Burning Urge EP 39:38 Ennui Trust “Pay It Forward” Ennui Trust 42:29 Caroline Says “Smoke and Mirrors” Ohio River EP 45:04 Sylvia Wrath “Softy” Saint Catherine 48:25 Your Heart Breaks “Wesley Crusher (feat. Kimya Dawson)” The Wrack Line 51:04 Dim Wit “Ms. Itnot” Dim Sh!t 53:27 Sigh “Pretty Furious” Images 55:37 Year Of Birds “Beg Steal or Borrow” Pellethead 57:33 Hefner “The Weight Of The Stars” The Fidelity Wars 60:27 Energy Slime “It’s Cold” Singles 62:25 JOBS “Similar Canvas” Similar Canvas

yesterday, i got on my bike. i went to the art show and i saw some art. i called my sister. i ate some cookies. we went to the other art show and saw more art. we went to the other other art show and saw even more art. i went to get a burrito and onion rings. i went to another place to eat it. we played cards. i biked home. i watched an episode of an old super hero television show. i went to sleep. i woke up. i made breakfast. i ate breakfast. i took a shower. i went to the farmar. we picked up donations. i went to the post office. i mailed some shirts. i went home. i made lunch. i worked on this radio show. here it is. DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Garbage Dreams “Backlash” Demonstrations 03:15 Holy Now “Dream” Sorry I messed up 06:48 Skirts “accident” abcdefg sides 08:57 VARSITY “Taken By Surprise” The Basement Takes (2015-2016) 11:53 Mal Devisa “In My Neighborhood” kiid 15:13 Ings “Chex Mix” lullaby rock 17:45 little star “all the time” humiliation (august-november demos) 21:03 Ice Cream “Peanut Butter” FED UP 24:12 Nothings “Physicality” Too Much 27:09 Body Lens “Fixing” Body Lens 30:02 Lazy Legs “Clotheater” Moth Mother 32:21 Cat Princess “Too Soon” Forbidden Items 35:59 Instant Bin “Entropy” There’s Something Poisonous in the Water 38:30 Lost Film “It’s Fine” Zero Summer 41:52 Cesar Ruiz “Sacred” Selected Anthem Works Vol.1 45:08 Brunch “I’m Uncomfortable” The Golden Age 48:28 Baby Jessica “Grieving” Cry 51:32 Yung KP “Art School” Baker EP 53:56 Candy “Familiar” Everything In Motion 56:29 Family Video “Cloud Dancers” Forever Changes Overnight 59:50 RILLA “Jupider” RILLA 62:19 Separate Spines “Different Clouds” Cut Up The Rainbow 64:45 Fran “So Surreal” A Private Picture 67:19 Nylex “Century of Faking” Plastic for People 69:19 Salad Boys “This Issue” This Issue b/w Onwards And Downwards

before typing this out i sat for a whole five minutes in total silence. it was an accident. i didn’t mean to do it. but i’m realizing i don’t do that enough these days. and that maybe i should do it for longer sometimes. i’m in my bedroom and no one else is home right now. i can hear some quiet bird sounds from outside. i know the highway is only a few hundred feet away but i can’t hear it. there’s a low hum from something. probably the fan in the bathroom? the half bath doesn’t have a window so keeping the fan on in there helps keep it from getting too stuffy. the refrigerator makes sound but it’s mostly easy to tune out. i wonder if my lamp is making a sound right now. i just heard a motorcycle for a second. and now it’s gone. the heater just came on. in 15 seconds the fan will kick in and in another 20 second it’ll reach my bedroom. sound waves move through air. the heat moves through air to my body. i baste in it so my fingers can defrost and so i can finish this message to you. and then i’ll silence my fingers for five minutes. DOWNLOAD/STREAM RECORDING 00:00 (intro by omar) 00:20 Kate Davis “Daisy” Trophy 03:14 Little Angry “Green Mountain” A Cup of Tea 06:51 ratbath “the devil” cold golden boxes 09:01 Chris Weisman “Yeah You” Romantics 10:22 Friendship “You Might Already Know” Dreamin’ 14:02 Fern Mayo “Goddess Under Exclusions” Week of Charm 17:53 Moor Mother “Passing Of Time” Analog Fluids Of Sonic Black Holes 22:05 Ganser “Motivational Speaking” You Must Be New Here 26:22 False Advertising “Reading it Wrong” Brainfreeze 30:30 Sharks’ Teeth “Face the Grove” Broken Trust in Satan 32:44 Romantic States “Mike’s Property” Ballerina 36:28 Sarchasm “Deadname” Beach Blanket Bummer Pop 39:43 James Kochalka Superstar “Tape Hiss” Eggs 40:56 Mono Lisa “Comment Party” Vision Engineering 44:22 Joy Cleaner “Bad Advice” You’re So Jaded 47:17 Parlor Walls “Spinning Gold” Lunchbox / Spinning Gold 50:18 Rachael Dadd “Palaeontologist” FLUX 54:38 Yawzea “Slaw” Zoning Demos 57:06 Shutups “Almost Won The Lotto” Every Day I’m Less Zen 60:10 Dead Little Penny “Out Of Body Experience” Urge Surfing 64:01 Squarehead “Maybe” High Time 67:46 WOOLWORM “Dogman” Awe 69:45 LACKER “HEAVENS” TWO-FACED GAG 71:44 thanks for coming “clue” the back of my knee 74:29 22 Halo “Big Fire” 22 Halo