Dad Hole, garbage robots, Northern European runts, and a system forged in the crucible of terrible people.

This week kicks off with Merlin having a rare on-air beverage to celebrate, but not too many, unless he feels like it. John helps Merlin remember some things that he couldn't remember he’d forgotten. Luckily, we record this program.

John thinks the water fountain story has been robbed of its power, and Merlin learns that cornhole is real. John tackles the first of several unfounded points about himself, but Merlin still thinks John is arbitrary. Britishisms are debated.

This leads to a nostalgic visit to The Early Internet and a recollection of how each of your hosts chose to roll with signatures and sign-offs and whatnot. John employs a little dash, and Merlin apologizes for trying to digitally impress a celebrity. He is the worst.

The stern admonishments continue as John lashes Merlin for not making Max buy a new phone differently. John prefers to stay in his bathrobe since they usually come in the morning. Excitingly, new iPhones are discussed.

Merlin lashes himself for accidentally stepping on John’s Full Media Blackout. In his defense, he was cooking tofu a new way at the time. John reminds us that he can erase memories from his mind. Thor: Ragnarok is lightly discussed. Merlin’s sweet precious angel made another doodle in her bastik and seems to be warming up to her little kennel. Unsurprisingly, John has notes.

The first mini-topic is hot dogs. Yes. Hot dogs. So, for a while, your hosts talk about hot dogs kind of a lot. Remember: you are paying NOTHING for this content.

Your hosts tread lightly through the minefield of primary school culture celebrations. Merlin has a terrible time coming up with memorable ancestral garb, and John has concerns about how well the factual roots of a given family tree will play with ten-year-olds. Merlin flatly refuses to apologize about macaroni and cheese.

Hot dogs are further discussed.

In what ends up being a main topic, John wants to address why Merlin is so steamed about Steam. The balance of the episode finds your hosts arguing about passwords, security, paranoia, and what we should do when confronted with two text fields and a button.

This week's challenge: play Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator.

And don't tell me there isn't one bit of difference between null and space, because that's exactly how much difference there is.