9to5 Entertainment System (9ES)

There’s more than a few photos kicking around of Brendan Gallagher, Andrei Markov and Tomas Plekanec all together on the Habs. They were all on the team from 2012 when Gallagher got called up to Markov’s departure at the end of the 2016-2017 season. All three of those guys played over 900 games for the bleu-blanc-rouge. I feel like only Markov has a real chance of having his number up in the rafters and even then I wouldn’t consider it a lock.

All the same Brendan Gallagher is certainly a player who I think most Habs fans will remember fondly for a very long time.

Pretty sure it’s the right time to move on, the team is younger and poor Gally is just not going to be a part of whatever the final form of this roster looks like. Still I can be a little sad about a guy who has often been described as “the heart and soul” of the team no longer wearing the CH.

Plus during the pandemic he did some genuinely funny tiktok videos. Even if they’re just lip-synching to scenes from TV shows that’s still more personally than we see from 99% of hockey players.

He posted one when they were going into the weird hockey bubble set to the Hunger Games theme song that I can’t find and that was extremely funny.

Anyways, apparently screw worms are coming to America this summer. I guess look it up on the internet if you want to get extra grossed out.

Scott and Jon both watched Ron Howard’s 2015 movie about Moby Dick In The Heart of the Sea and it seemed that they both were pretty mixed on the whole thing.

Finally, Scott still really, really hates Andor. You’d think it starred Matt Damon or something.

Over on Garbage Time we talk about how crazy it is that Marvel and DC still work month to month and pay artists and writers by the page when they’re now controlled by monstrous entities like Disney and Warner Bros. We then discover that there is SO MUCH MORE Walking Dead than you think there is.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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It’s a pretty big shame that we didn’t fantasy book how Ronda Rousey would fare in the Mortal Kombat tournament. There was such an obvious throughline between the MMA talk, Brock Lesnar and Mortal Kombat II and it was right there in front of us.

Shame.

Would Ronda Rousey last more than 17 seconds against Baraka or Goro? Of course not. She essentially only has one move and good luck catching a guy with knife-hands in an armbar. Would Goro even care if you caught one of his four beefy arms in an armbar? Probably not.

You know who might do well in Mortal Kombat? Victor Wembanyama. We talk a little about “The Alien”, who is 7’4″ with a nearly 8 foot wingspan from fingertip to fingertip. If you’ve got 20 minutes you can watch the full video of 60 highlights but I’ve timestamped number 9 to give you an idea of how weird this guy moves compared to just about anybody else who’s ever played basketball.

Anyways, all that to say Scott saw Mortal Kombat II over the weekend and we’re pleased to report that it continues and maybe even improves upon 2021’s excellent reboot of the series. Injecting Carl Urban into any franchise is a surefire winner I always say.

Finally, we’ve got a very special episode of Garbage Time for you this week where we talk a LOT about 2007’s Ghost Rider starring Nicholas Cage. This movie is basically everything you could possibly want from a film where Nicholas Cage plays a stuntman who’s head catches on fire who rides a motorcycle and hunts down demons and bad guys. Oh and he also drinks jellybeans out of a martini glass. There is just no way that was in the script. That’s pure Cage baby. Enjoy.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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If you have not been following hilarious drama surrounding The Onion’s attempt to purchase InfoWars then you’re missing out. Look, it’s even being reported on the BBC.

Something that I did not actually know about InfoWars is that Alex Jones thinks of himself as a kind of prophet. Well, at least Tucker Carlson thinks so.

“He’s channeling something, I’ve asked him about it. ‘How did you do that?’ At length, during dinner on my barn recently. We’re talking about this. ‘How’d you do that?’ ‘I don’t know. It just came to me.’ And that’s real. That is real. The supernatural is real and I don’t know why it’s hard for for the modern mind, I guess because it’s a materialist mind to accept that.”

“That’s not a new phenomenon. It’s happened throughout history. There are people called prophets, and there are people who were prophets who weren’t called prophets, but there are people who have information or parts of information, bits of information, visions of information come to them and then they relay it.”

We’re in the wrong business, kids.

Anyways, we talk a little about some upcoming horror flicks, namely Zach Cregger’s Resident Evil and Mike Flanagan’s Clayface, both of which have trailers that are out now.

We kick things off by talking about the unlikely Game 7 victory of the Montreal Canadiens over the Tampa Bay Lightning but I promise you we get good and nerdy after that’s out of the way.

On this week’s Garbage Time we talk about how and why Eurotrip practically killed an entire film genre (and here’s the link the video that I reference), Jon watched Crank: High Voltage which leads to a deep dive into Jason Statham’s career and we wrap things up with, you guessed it, more hockey talk because the Habs are still in the playoffs and 66% of us love ourselves some hockey!

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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Even though this episode is only coming out on April 23rd (if Jono edits it on time) I can assure you that it was recorded on April 20th. You know… the stoner day. 420 bay-bay. Anyways, that’s the flimsy excuse for why we spend time talking about Sublime and Cypress Hill. There’s a lot to unpack but the gist of it is that the drummer from Sublime is a MAGA Trump supporter. Then Cypress Hill dropped out of the Sublime festival this summer that is run by a big MAGA donator.

Many suspect that is the reason Cypress Hill dropped out of the festival.

Four twenty blaaaaazzeee yeeeeahhhh.

Anyways, a lot of music talk in this one. We talk about Nine Inch Noize (the recent collaboration between Nine Inch Nails and Boys Noize), Angine de Poitrine and Diplo kind of being the worst. The future of music might be AI slop but I don’t need to like it.

We wrap things up with with some Stephen King adaptations with Jon watching The Long Walk and Scott finishing off Welcome to Derry.

Over on Garbage Time we talk about Nirvanna the Band the Show (specifically the webseries which is mercifully well preserved on this website), provide our Wrestlemania 42 takes, talk about the Habs vs the Bolts in the first round of the Stanley Cup playoffs and wrap up talking about Shoresy Season 5. Oh also Matt clarified that they use “Army” as an end-credit song for Nirvanna The Band The Show because it’s one of Jay’s favorite bands and it’s one of the first things he ever shared with Matt. Mystery solved. Thanks Reddit!.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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The Super Mario Galaxy Movie is fine. There, now you don’t need to listen to the podcast. No wait.

The Super Mario Galaxy Movie came out on Easter because it’s FULL of Easter Eggs, listen now to hear about all of them. You won’t believe #24!

Seriously though, about halfway through the movie I was pretty exhausted from the way it was throwing Nintendo references in my face without barely any rhyme or reason. It was pretty watchable but with that talented of a voice cast I was really hoping for a little more room for them to shine. Ah well.

So we shot humans into space and they got further away from the planet Earth than ever before. That’s pretty cool right? Well, there’s a few conspiracy theories kicking around that the Artemis 2’s heat shields aren’t up to snuff after some issues that were identified with Artemis 1. NASA says they figured it out and everything will be ok so I’m really hoping everything goes smoothly when they land on Friday.

Jono watched The Grey Man on Netflix and it was less than the sum of its parts. The guy who wrote the books has knocked out 15 of them in the last 17 years, what do you mean they aren’t high quality examples of creativity?

Over on Garbage Time we talk about some Super Nintendo Entertainment System trivia for a little while and then catch up on what Jon and Keith are playing in terms of good ole vidya. Noita and Cyberpunk 2077 respectively.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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We only really talk about Sam Kieth’s passing towards the end of the episode but I think we should have probably talked about his work more off the top.

I can’t really understate how hard The Maxx hit when I first stumbled upon it in the early 90s. I came to Sam Kieth’s work through the animated series but later when I dug into his comics (including his work on Sandman) I found myself pushed further and further down the path as an “indie comics” kid.

Are Jim Mahood and Jhonen Vasquez two of my favorite artists if not for the work of Sam Kieth? Probably not.

Jim Lee on Sam Kieth:

“”Kieth, who was not just a big name coming off his sensational run on Marvel Comics Presents, but a friend who also loved talking about the psychological underpinnings of our favorite characters. My pitch to Sam back then was simple: come do whatever you want. Total creative freedom. Own it all. Take it wherever you want-or nowhere at all. And Sam ran with it and launched his creation ‘the Maxx’ through our anthology series Darker Image #1, promptly selling over a million copies.”

We talk about plenty of other stuff too but I just wanted to give one of the greats his due.

We talk about how often science fiction gets things wrong, a bunch of other celebrity deaths, the Firefly reboot, Buffy, the Arrowverse and how horror movies are getting their flowers at the Oscars. Just the usual stuff you’ve come to know and love about the 9to5 Entertainment System.

Over on Garbage Time we immediately break our promise about Garbage Time being the more “fun” and “less depressing” of the two versions of the show. We talk about tuberculosis, cancer, people getting sick from scurvy and everyone’s favorite worm: the screw-worm. Are you not intrigued? We wrap things up by talking about the viral marketing for the new Faces of Death movie and then we wax philosophical about how there are just too many dang comics being published.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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If you haven’t heard of Nirvanna The Band The Show then you’re doing yourself a disservice. I’m actually pretty shocked that both Jon and Scott aren’t more familiar with it. Tracking down the Viceland episodes seems to be a bit of a trick these days but there is still a delightful fansite that has thoughtfully preserved the Nirvanna The Band webseries episodes for your enjoyment.

If you have a chance to check out Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie in theaters I’m fairly sure you won’t be disappointed. However, it was produced by Crave so if you have that service I’m sure you’ll find it on streaming soon enough.

While you’re at it you should probably check out The Dirties, Operation: Avalanche and BlackBerry too.

Since everything is fine in the world we spend some time talking about how CEOs eat their hamburgers. If you haven’t seen the footage I think it’s somehow both more and less cringe than you think it is. On first watch I thought it wasn’t so bad, but then I watched it again and decided that the McDonald’s CEO might not even be an actual human being.

We talk about other stuff too. What jobs are going to be stolen by artificial intelligence, UFC BMF Champion Charles Oliveira and his entire leg-sleeve Pokemon tattoo, the Masters of the Universe movie trailer and Scott’s dislike of medical dramas.

Anyways, we spend this episode of Garbage Time talking about how much the sports writers for the Montreal Gazette kind of suck. That leads us towards the death of print media and how much we miss Vice Magazine. Not sure how we go from there to curling and ultra marathons but you know what? We do.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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We talked about this a lot last episode: Scott and Keith really like the Winter Olympics. Jono? He didn’t even wake up to watch the Men’s Hockey Gold Medal game against the USA. I guess not only is he not a fan of sports he also hates his country.

I’m not even sure Jon is Canadian at all – how much do we really know about this man we’ve recorded 357 podcasts with really?

Anyways, the Canadian Men and Women’s Hockey teams failed us and lost to Team USA in overtime in both games. That sucked. Then Kash Patel was somehow let into Team USA Men’s locker room after the game and that sucked even more.

We go over our favorite moments of this edition of the Winter Olympics that are mostly just the best memes honestly.

Also – if you read the blog post for episode 356 you’ll remember that I was hyped about Ski Mountaineering. Well it didn’t disappoint.

We wrap things up with finally getting Sinners onto “The List” and for some reason Scott made himself watch “Kraven the Hunter” while Jono made the much more reasonable decision to watch “A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms”.

Anyways, we spend this episode of Garbage Time we talk about all 6 episodes of “Heated Rivalry” which naturally leads us into trying to figure out how to put “Shoresy” and “Heated Rivalry” into a shared universe. Scott’s kid is playing Hollow Knight, Brady Tkachuk looks like Sloth from “The Goonies” and Scott gives some updates about voice work on the X-Men Audio Drama.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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Scott and Keith really like the Winter Olympics. Jono? I guess he’s probably meh on them and sports in general.

Maybe that’s why Jon has maybe like 5 minutes of talk time in an episode that is almost entirely devoted to the main sporting events of the last week (being of course the SuperBowl, the Winter Olympics and Kid Rock popping up out of a stage like a muppet in a fur coat only to lip synch his way through “Bawitaba”).

The Winter Olympics have always been more compelling to me than the Summer edition. Is it because we have snow and ice in Canada and that’s the main ingredient of basically every sport at the Winter Olympics? Maybe. But also it’s because the sports themselves are just so much more hard core.

Take a look at the winter biathlon. It’s a cross country ski race where you have to randomly stop and shoot targets with a rifle. Why did they randomly inject shooting a gun into a race?

Let’s take a look at the debuting sports in the last Summer and Winter Olympics, shall we? Paris 2024 decided to show the world “breakdancing”. Neat. Making its debut in Italy this week? “Ski Mountaineering” That’s right, a sport about skiing and climbing uphill before racing back down it. See what I’m saying? HARDCORE.

Also, Keith mistakenly stated that there were no new cards coming out in Hearthstone and boy was he wrong. Cards apparently rotate out of the game after 2 years and new packs of 100+ cards rotate in 3 times a year. There are about 1500 cards at any given point in “Standard” format and the 4500 other cards that have rotated out are all still available to play in “Wild” format.

Wowowow.

Anyways, we spend this episode of Garbage Time talking about the films of Christopher Guest, The Rip on Netflix and Keith’s first thoughts on Cyberpunk 2077. Scott also marathoned all of Delicious in Dungeon. I know Scott says the trailer doesn’t do the show justice, but I just watched it and it seems to be exactly what he described. And I’m still not interested in watching it at all. Scott also watched Sinners but we’ll hold off on ranking it until we talk about it in the main episode. Hopefully we remember in 2 weeks.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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So about halfway through the recording of this podcast you will hear Scott exclaim “Fuck that guy!” and it will be revealed that he is talking about Matt Damon.

To peel back the curtain a little about our recording process we usually take a little water break around the 30 minute mark. It lets us make sure everything is going well with the recording, refill water glasses, go to the bathroom, etc.  Sometimes we have a little chit chat that isn’t necessarily relevant to the podcast then we reset, hit record and get on with the show.

Scott hates Matt Damon so much that he could not contain himself during this little break. Well, Matt Damon was in the news recently talking about how Netflix wants filmmakers to constantly recap the plot of their movies since they assume people are only paying half attention. That’s pretty good podcast talk so we decide to jump into it as our next topic.

I say, “I’ll hit record and you tee this one up Scott” and he proceeded to tee it up by saying “Fuck that guy!”

So that’s why we end up with a silky smooth transition like “Oh I want to see Marty Supreme” directly into “Fuck that guy!”

It kind of sounds like Scott hates Marty Supreme but no, he hates Matt Damon.

Anyways, two of us have watched Bugonia so we talk about that a little and put it on The List.

Some other stuff happens too.

We once again spend most of this episode of Garbage Time talking about Keith’s experience with the endgame of Clair Obscur: Expedition 33. We get deep into spoilers of the twists and endings of the game so listener discretion is advised if you’re planning on playing it (and you should be). We also share some stories of public transportation and talk about Kanye’s apology letter.

If you would like to show your support and head over to Patreon and subscribe at the 9ES Deluxe tier to listen to this and all past episodes of Garbage Time that would be appreciated.

Our intro song is a brand new jam cooked up by OKU-DA just for us, do yourself a favour and check out his SoundCloud).

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