Deb and Ron DeArmond were married more than 40 years before they decided to write a book about marriage. They waited so long in part because it took them more years than it should have ' by their own admission ' to learn some of the lessons in their new book 'Don't Go To Bed Angry: Stay Up and Fight.'The book says that the problem in marriage is not conflict, but how we deal with conflict. In a fallen world, they say, conflict is inevitable. But conflict doesn't have to lead to destruction. It can lead to discovery, greater insight into our spouses's thoughts, feelings and perspective. Ron DeArmond is a pastor, and Deb DeArmond is a writer, trainer, and consultant.