Happy Thanksgiving, ALOI!!!

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Eric takes a Neddy bye. Prox blasts me in the eye. HOKARR’s stock drops. Peter drops a deuce, virtually guaranteeing Wil will make the playoffs. In a deadly game of musical chairs between Peter, HOKARR, Josh, Jordan, and Will, who will be left standing? (In this case, standing is bad, you see, because sitting people got a chair and made the playoffs—try to keep up, dummies!)

The League heavily desires my players, but can they acquire them? It will take a special keeper to make the final blockbuster move of the season!

Blah blah blah, week 11!

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Shit is getting really really real now, as one month remains in the regular season!

Can Keith parlay his big SweetGreen into something more? A playoff spot, perhaps? (Probably not.)

Tune in to see if Keith has anything to say about beating Tim this week!

Also, I hope you like Whitney Houston! We continue to spew garbage as long as you guys continue to listen, so…enjoy!

Here are the reports for week 10:

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The season is really coming into focus. Only 7 will make it. We know who isn’t making it. So really now, it’s: Don’t be 8th or 9th.

Punishment comes down to 3 people also. The other 9 of you can be considered safe.

This week was a pretty pathetically mediocre and average week, in an average league, participated in by some pretty average middle-aged guys. But the sum of us is greater than our holes, or something like that. Together, we make this league something special.

Instead of doing this show, I should have spent an hour reading the transcript of the brilliant shit-talking war between Eric and me this past Sunday, but instead, I wasted two hours of everyone’s time to create absolutely no new thoughts or knowledge. You’re welcome.

Here are this week’s reports:

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Jon has heard enough of our whining. He reminds us we are men, then we promptly forget about this and start whining again!

New sounds this week! Plus a tribute to a legendary pimp/dicksman!

We’ve got the movers, the risers, the fallers, the new league leaders, the new cellar dwellers (well, that’s actually the same.) Find it ALL here on ALOI Podcast!

Including THIS:

Just two hours? These guys are slipping!

Now, enjoy these reports, generated by Keifff, computer semi-genius, and STFU!

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Well, it’s the thing everyone’s talking about. HJ left the WhatsApp chat, and the fucking world has turned upside down. Enough that we dropped 177-minute podcast to discuss it! New content bursts from every seam, and oozes out everywhere, all over Wil’s birthday cake. OOPS.

Enjoy the fact that we did pretty much every segment we can do on this pod. The season is in its prime, so there is much to discuss.

Also, enjoy my new reports that I wrote awesome scripts to generate. (below) Why doesn’t Yahoo! just program their site the way that I do? Because they’re dumb fucks, that’s why.

If you don’t have a trans-Atlantic flight, this pod may prove difficult to finish in one sitting, kind of like that woman Joshy met at Giant Eagle.

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The trade frenzy has reached a fever pitch! Who got one, who’s left in the cold? The rich get richer, the poor get poorer. Ned, Prox, and Keiff limp towards halfway with NOTHING to show for 6 weeks of work.

Keith unLOADs two new, terrible songs this week… which is less terrible?

9 Teams Remain—who will take the crown?

If you have 100 minutes to burn, no real threshold for boredom, and two ears, boy do I have a podcast for you!

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In a heartwarming turn, 2/3 of the holy trinity has returned to Dublin! In other news, the season is over for Ned and Keith, as two men abandon their bids to win, only 33% of the way through the year. 10 men with a chance remain.

This week, waivers, name changes and trades came in a blinding flurry of HOT ALOI ACTION! We talk about all of it. For WAY too long.

Don’t miss this two-hour tribute to wasting your fucking time!

TRIVIA: The ALOI Podcast hit a new high of 54 downloads last week. What is going ON out there?

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Welcome to a Post-Punishment world. Tim’s win now COUNT, which is as disturbing as the man himself. Keifff gets his first victory, so we can stop listening to him whine, and the Empire is successfully defended! A weird haiku makes an appearance. And perhaps the best show close of all TIMe?

Much, much more shit is thrown at your earholes this week! Enjoy?

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Week 3 is in the books, and it was a brutal one for many owners, with 9/12 owners underperforming projections. 2 of the 3 who did overperform were within 5 of their original projection. Low-scoring week.

Can we implement a fucking median, please?

Keith wrote a nifty little program to scrape data from the site and calculate numbers and awards. Pretty soon, the podcast will record itself!

Now sit back and enjoy a fuckload of Tim content!

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