April 24, 2024

A story of "moderation hell" -- you don't have to be a "full blown alcoholic" to have a problem -- with Anne Nicely, AKA, the_bright_eyed_sober_girl

1 hour 16 minutes

Meet Anne, business owner, mom, wife, daughter, and a "moderate" drinker, or so she thought. Thank you Anne for giving me the space to share your story. I am in awe of you and everything you are doing to promote that life can be beautiful when we don't lean on alcohol as a crutch or as an escape.

From Anne:

Shame dies when we share… secrets keep us sick.
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I know on a personal level how true these statements are.
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I stayed stuck for a long time. I lived in moderation hell that made my mental health suffer. I was riddled with guilt and shame for days after consuming too much alcohol when I planned on only have 2. 😑
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Who actually wants 2… I mean… what is the actual point. 🤦🏻‍♀️
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I wanted to escape and feel the dopamine rush of alcohol entering my blood and flowing into my brain.
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Things slowed down and I could “feel” happy, confident, and calm.
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If you are here reading this… my guess is… YOU wanted that to. 🥺
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Sadly, it never measured up to what I hoped.
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Once the alcohol wore off… I would be left with crippling anxiety, shame, guilt and the physical hangover.
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I was nauseous, inflammation filled and popping Tylenol to cut the throbbing headaches.
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This pain was awful but the holes I felt on the inside were worse.
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I hated that I was on this hamster wheel. I hated that I was using this stupid liquid to escape uncomfortable emotions or social events I didn’t even want to attend. 🤦🏻‍♀️
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I hated that I used it to elevate a date night with my Husband or when I felt like I needed connection to go deeper with friends.
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I hated that I reached for alcohol.
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I felt like such a failure. I was angry that I couldn’t just lay it down. I HATED that I hated it and still wanted it.. it made me feel crazy.🤯💔
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I hated that I drank a poison I swore and declared as a child I WOULD NEVER do.
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I hated that alcohol robbed my childhood and here I was.. doing the exact same thing my father did. 💔
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I hated knowing I was capable of more because that meant I needed to change.
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Change is so scary. I feel you.
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But last night I shared my story again and 545 days later…
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I wouldn’t change anything.
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I want to use my story to help other women who feel the same.
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Maybe we didn’t have the same childhood or relationship with alcohol but I can promise we all felt the same after drinking.

Please go follow Anne on Instagram @the_bright_eyed_sober_girl. Her DM's are always open if you would like to talk.

If you need professional help below are some additional resources:

www.shewalkscanada.com - FREE weekly meetings (not AA) with trained professionals. Women-only.

www.aa.com - AA has helped MILLIONS of people. Don't let the stories or stigma scare you. Take a chance and call the local AA chapter in your area.

https://www.soberincentralpark.com/. Rachel is a trained sober coach (her story is also an episode here!) and might be able to help you. Please reach out.

https://www.thrivealcoholfree.com: Dupe is also a trained sober coach but more for the moderate drinker who is sober curious. She is amazing so please reach out for more information.