Accessing Your Best Self with Devorah Vale

What is your love language? Do you know the love language of that person in your Circle 1 who is hard to love? Sometimes our love is not being received because we are speaking Chinese to a person whose language is Yiddish. Go ahead and ask. What is your language of love? How can I make you feel loved? 

Tznius is about covering our ego and developing our internality. Do we compromise this when we do mitzot in a showy way? The great people hid their great levels of learnng and piety in order not to attract attention. Of course, there are times and places where we shoud 'show what we know' and do external acts in order to inspire those around us to grow. What is your kavana? Is Hashem your number 1 audience or are you out to impress yourself and others!

Why is it that sometimes our giving is not received? It seems that often our giving can be connected to other feelings. We give with resentment, guilt, pity or with strings attached. I give to you but only because I expect you to return the giving. All of these feelings get in the way of pure giving or ahavas chinam which can account for why my giving is not having the impact it should have.

Why is it that sometimes our giving is not received? It seems that often our giving can be connected to other feelings. We give with resentment, guilt, pity or with strings attached. I give to you but only because I expect you to return the giving. All of these feelings get in the way of pure giving or ahavas chinam which can account for why my giving is not having the impact it should have.

Why is it that sometimes our giving is not received? It seems that often our giving can be connected to other feelings. We give with resentment, guilt, pity or with strings attached. I give to you but only because I expect you to return the giving. All of these feelings get in the way of pure giving or ahavas chinam which can account for why my giving is not having the impact it should have.

Why is it that sometimes our giving is not received? It seems that often our giving can be connected to other feelings. We give with resentment, guilt, pity or with strings attached. I give to you but only because I expect you to return the giving. All of these feelings get in the way of pure giving or ahavas chinam which can account for why my giving is not having the impact it should have.

Why is it that sometimes our giving is not received? It seems that often our giving can be connected to other feelings. We give with resentment, guilt, pity or with strings attached. I give to you but only because I expect you to return the giving. All of these feelings get in the way of pure giving or ahavas chinam which can account for why my giving is not having the impact it should have.

Tznius/ modesty does not only apply to women but to men too. It is a shared obligation. Both men and women are expected to guard their eyes from exposure to violent or sexual images,and protect the purity of their minds and soul. Since men are more easily aroused and more likely to objectify women, men need extra guards to maintain that purity. Shmirat Einayim is one of the ways men do this. Women help men by dressing modestly in an external way, and they also protect their own internality by being 'attractive but not attracting!' Developing one's internality and covering the ego is the goal of tzniut for both men and women.

Truly loving others comes from a very deep place in the nefesh/soul. It is not only about fulfilling the mitza between you and others but also is a mitzva between you and Hashem. Loving others whether they deserve it or not, or whether they return that love or appreciate it is not the point. You are loving Hashem's creations and He appreciates you giving to them especially when its hard! No good thought, word or deed goes unnoticed! In heaven it is all being recorded. Your efforts matter! You become a more loving person and that's the point!

In this class we ask ourselves to check our intentions? Why are we talking instead of listening? How are we giving into our desires and leading with the ego when it comes to why we do what we do. As we grow in our internality, we recognize that often we do things for the wrong reasons. Tznius is about weeding out our ulterior motives. What we want to strive for is doing things for the sake of heaven...for the right and loftier reasons. It's not about ME! Or what YOU THINK OF ME as much as it should be about What does Hashem Think of ME!!