Active Pause

In this conversation, Eric Zimmer talks about mindful choices, and the parable that inspires him:

A grandfather is talking with his grandson and he says there are two wolves inside of us which are always at war with each other. One of them is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred and fear.

The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?” The grandfather quietly replies: The one you feed.

Eric Zimmer is the host of The One You Feed podcast. The show was named a Best of 2014 Podcast by iTunes and one of the best health podcasts of all time by The Huffington Post. The show is about creating a life worth living and can be found at http://oneyoufeed.net. At the age of 24 Eric was homeless, addicted to heroin and facing looming jail sentences. In the years since he has found a way to recover from addiction and build a life worth living. In addition to the podcast he does coaching work with numerous individuals and companies. He has been involved in many successful startup companies in the software and clean energy industries. He also founded Tipping Point Renewable Energy in 2008.

Published May 2016

In this interview, Dr Charlson talks about her work with mindfulness interventions to improve outcome in chronic illness. While these situations are obviously more extreme than the situations many of us are faced with in everyday life, her work suggests that some mindful practices may improve our ability to make the difficult changes we need, or to deal with extremely difficult situations in our own lives:

– For cardiovascular patients, a daily practice of paying attention to what feels good in their life is associated with an increased and sustained ability to make the lifestyle changes they need, and hence an ability to stay healthy. When we try to make difficult changes, we usually focus on the drama of fighting bad habits. It might help to spend some time taking stock of the potential we have to take care of ourselves and to enjoy whatever good there is in our life.

– The ability of cancer patients to make peace with their condition is improved by a combination of basic mindfulness skills, and a reframing of their experience in terms of the inevitability of human suffering. Hence the working hypothesis to explore in our everyday life: When we deal with overwhelming situations, it may help to focus on mindfully regulating our natural reactivity, were it only to improve our ability to process a reframing of the situation.

Mary Charlson, MD, is the William T. Foley Distinguished Professor of Medicine, Director of the Center for Integrative Medicine and Chief of the Division of Clinical Epidemiology and Evaluative Sciences Research, at Weill Cornell Medical College. Dr. Charlson received her medical degree from Yale University School of Medicine. After completing her residency at Johns Hopkins Hospital, she was a Robert Wood Johnson Clinical Scholar at Yale.

As a clinical epidemiologist, her work has focused on developing interventions targeted at improving outcomes in chronic illness. She has developed the widely used Charlson Comorbidity Index. She has a long track record of successful RCTs among patients with chronic illness. Over the last fifteen years, a major focus has been on developing interventions that help patients change behavior and reduce stress to improve their overall health. She also has been the PI on 8 separate NHLBI funded RCTS involving 2,725 patients.

See also: Harnessing the power of the placebo effect

Published May 2016

Steven Hoskinson, MA, MAT, is the Founder and Chief Compassion Officer (CCO) of Organic Intelligence® and the 501(c)(3) nonprofit Organic Intelligence Outreach Institute. Steve created the Human Empowerment And Resiliency Training (OI HEARTraining®) based on Organic Intelligence, which is a positive psychology, fractal method known for its implicit exposure approach to trauma. Since 1999, Steve has trained thousands of professionals in North America, Europe, Asia, and the Middle East in the art of the compassionate treatment of trauma. As Professional Training Faculty for the SE™ Trauma Institute, he has mentored and trained teachers across the globe and is also Adjunct Faculty for JFK University’s Somatic Psychology program. Steve is a founding member of the Northern California Society for Integrative Mental Health and the International Transformational Resilience Coalition. He also served on the Global Training and Education Council for the SE™ Trauma Institute. See OrganicIntelligence.org

Published May, 2016. See printable PDF transcript.

In this conversation, we talk about ‘Contemplative Thinking’: How it differs from what we usually describe as ‘thinking’, and how it fosters creativity.

Three phases are described:

Pause: Unless we pause, we tend to keep going on the same track with our blinders on. Think about the cartoon situation of the character walking off the edge of the cliff, not realizing they’re no longer on firm ground.

Orienting: We make a deliberate effort to pay attention to our body, not just to thoughts. Not that thoughts are bad… But we’re depriving ourselves of much of our processing ability if we cut off our body.

Getting out of our own way: Instead of trying very hard, as if we were trying to squeeze ideas out of a tube, we gently allow ‘felt sense’ information (e.g. intuition, hunch, insight) to come up from inside.

‘Contemplative Thinking’ occurs naturally. What helps us get better at it is to observe it when it happens, so that we become more aware of it.

In case you want to come back to specific explanations of this process after listening to the podcast as a whole, see:

– Description of the 3 phases: From 18’45” to 20’50”

– How this is not just a shift in intentionality, it is a different body experience that allows fresh thinking: From 21’00” to 25’30”

– How this applies to real life, in real-time: From 25’30” to 34’00”

By the way, this recorded conversation is an instance of creative thinking fostered by an environment that is safe and stimulating. David’s presence and his way of holding the space made it possible for me (Serge) to go further into the concepts than I had before, with a sense of effortlessness, as if I was observing their unfolding and describing it,

David I. Rome is the developer of Mindful Focusing, an integration of Eugene Gendlin’s Felt-Sense Focusing and Buddhist mindfulness-awareness practices (http://www.mindfulfocusing.com). He is the author of Your Body Knows the Answer; Using Your Felt Sense to Solve Problems, Effect Change, and Liberate Creativity (Shambhala Publications, 2014). David currently serves as board president for the Focusing Institute. Earlier in his career, David studied Buddhism and trained in meditation and other contemplative practices with Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, whom he also served as a private secretary for many years.

Published April 2016. See also conversation on Mindful Focusing.

In this conversation, we talk about ‘Contemplative Thinking’: How it differs from what we usually describe as ‘thinking’, and how it fosters creativity.

In case you want to come back to specific explanations of this process after listening to the podcast as a whole, see:

– Description of the 3 phases: From 18’45” to 20’50”

– How this is not just a shift in intentionality, it is a different body experience that allows fresh thinking: From 21’00” to 25’30”

– How this applies to real life, in real-time: From 25’30” to 34’00”

By the way, this recorded conversation is an instance of creative thinking fostered by an environment that is safe and stimulating. David’s presence and his way of holding the space made it possible for me (Serge) to go further into the concepts than I had before, with a sense of effortlessness, as if I was observing their unfolding and describing it,

David I. Rome is the developer of Mindful Focusing, an integration of Eugene Gendlin’s Felt-Sense Focusing and Buddhist mindfulness-awareness practices (http://www.mindfulfocusing.com). He is the author of Your Body Knows the Answer; Using Your Felt Sense to Solve Problems, Effect Change, and Liberate Creativity (Shambhala Publications, 2014). David currently serves as board president for the Focusing Institute. Earlier in his career, David studied Buddhism and trained in meditation and other contemplative practices with Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, whom he also served as a private secretary for many years.

Published April 2016. See also conversation on Mindful Focusing.

In this video conversation with Beatrice Blake, we talk about how to think out of the box: Instead of just relying on linear logic, how we can use all of our resources in a mindful way.

We hope you are inspired by this conversation to experiment with a Mindful Listening Partnership. In addition to the above video, you may find it helpful to:

– watch 5-minute video on Mindful Listening Partnerships,

– read Mindful Listening Partnership FAQ.

This Creative Listening Partnership is based on the principles of Focusing and Thinking At the Edge (TAE). Once you experience how naturally this process works, you may want to find out more.

Originally trained as a Doctor of Oriental Medicine, Beatrice Blake has been a Certified Focusing trainer since 2000. She offers individual and small group classes for people who want to learn how to think from their own lived experience. Beatrice offers free half-hour introductory sessions online.  She also teaches “Generating a Culture of Peace”, combining Nonviolent Communication and Focusing. Find out more at http://possibility-space.com. In Spanish at http://focusingelsalvador.org.

Published April 2016

The starting point for this conversation was an article about a situation where therapy had unintended consequences. This led us to find a moment to discuss what it is that we know, and how we can act on it, not just as therapists, but also as human beings.

Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD is a licensed psychologist who treats individuals and couples in her private practice in Basking Ridge, NJ and presents nationally to lay and professional audiences on relationship problems and self-criticism. She is the relationships expert on WebMD’s Relationships and Coping Community; writes for WebMD’s “Relationships” blog; and writes another blog called “Making Change” for Psychology Today. She is the author of Insecure in Love: How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It (New Harbinger Publications), which was released in May 2014. She was also the consulting psychologist for the book Love: The Psychology of Attachment (DK Publishing, 2016). Read more at www.drbecker-phelps.com

Published March 2016

In this conversation, we explore dissociation and embodiment. It helps to think of dissociation as a natural “skill” that is necessary for us to be able to multitask – e.g. in such simple things as walking whilst not paying attention to our legs. In order for that dissociation to not become semi-permanent, we should naturally cultivate a positive relationship to the health in our bodies. Constant attention to problem solving and only focussing on what is “wrong” sets us up to be more likely to lose coherence. This has important implications for both psychological and physiological/physical health.

Andrew Cook: I originally trained as a mining engineer – and then re-trained as a hydrogeologist. After some time in a research post, I worked in rural water development projects in deserts (including 2 years on the fringes of the Kalahari), and eventually specialised in the hydrology of wetland nature reserves. Parallel to this, from about 1987, I became interested in complementary therapies, and qualified as a Craniosacral Therapy practitioner in 1997. Other influences include about 20 years taiji/qigong practice, and an enduring love of nature. I see the human body in the context of the natural world in which we evolved, and to which we are inextricably linked. I now live and work as a Craniosacral Therapist in Norfolk, UK. See: http://www.body-mind.co.uk/

Published March 2016

Neal H. Brodsky, LMFT uses expressive therapies to help adults, young people, and families create lives they love. He is licensed in Marriage & Family Therapy and certified in both Core Energetics and Embodied Couples Work (Exceptional Marriage Approach.) Neal was originally trained in Film and Television and is particularly adept in helping clients visualize and create profound and lasting change in life. He is one of 10 therapists from around the world contributing a chapter to the 2015 book “Deep Play: Exploring the Use of Depth in Psychotherapy with Children” and his work supports the “inner children” of adult clients to resolve past family difficulty and allow the flourishing of life tasks and relationships. Neal’s U.S. offices are in New York City and Connecticut and he works with expat couples and families around the world through video-assisted online sessions along with his wife Judy Gotlieb, LMFT. See LoveLifeCounseling.com.

Published: March 2016. See printable PDF transcript.

As you listen to this conversation, we hope you heave as much fun as we had meandering through various topics related to mindfulness and the human condition.

Dwight Hurst is a psychotherapist, writer, and podcaster who lives in Utah. He lives with 3 cool children, one cool wife, and a cool but nervous little dog. Dwight is the host & creator of The Broken Brain podcast and writes psychology articles and strange short stories. Follow him on Twitter @breakabrain or at http://dwighthurst.com

Published February 2016