This week Dave and Jeff clamber aboard a trireme and follow Telemachus as he leaves Ithaca (for the first time?) and heads to the Peloponnese in search of news of his missing father. After leaving Nestor (and escaping his grumpy old man, “back in my day” monologues) it’s on to Sparta to visit Menelaus and Helen. Here things are so tense that Helen has to mix some sort of magic sedative into the Mountain Dew. Stick around for Menelaus and Helen’s strikingly different versions of the Trojan Horse story, and possible answers to the questions “Could the Trojan War have been avoided if they had just had better coffee?” and “Who cares what Jeff wore on his first day of high school?”