In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines, Zaira sits down with Kat Shahinian-Buffa to explore the layers of secrecy, grief, and reclamation embedded in kinship adoption. From being adopted the day she was born to uncovering that her sister is also her cousin through a DNA test, Kat walks us through her journey of survival, family deception, and international discovery. Together, they dig into the ways adoption alters identity, why even kinship adoption can be deeply harmful, and what it means to raise yourself.

In this episode, we cover:

• (00:20) Kat’s adoption story, growing up with five siblings, and being raised by her biological uncle’s wife.
• (06:54) Realizing the burden of being “chosen,” perfectionism, and being othered in her adoptive family.
• (17:37) How DNA tests blew open family secrets—including discovering her sister is also her cousin.
• (27:15) Why even kinship adoption isn’t inherently safer or healthier—and how it distorts medical history and relationships.
• (42:10) The long road to healing, mental health support, and raising yourself.

Call To Action:
Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts. Follow us on social media and Substack for more content and community:

• Website: adopteescrossinglines.com
• Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines
• BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social
• TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_
• Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack

Connect with Kat Shahinian-Buffa:
Instagram: @kadasarus
BlueSky: @kadasaurus.bsky.social

Work With Me:
Email [email protected] for brand partnerships and business inquiries.

Editing by J. Way (AV Editor)
Special thanks to J. Way for editing this podcast. To collaborate with her, email [email protected].

In this powerful episode, attorney and pro-Black adoptee Aretha Frazier shares her story of being adopted by her aunt in a kinship placement that was far from simple. From navigating family loyalty and control to confronting abuse and the myth of gratitude, Aretha opens up about what it really meant to grow up in a household where blood ties didn’t guarantee safety or care. She and Zaira dive deep into the complexities of kinship adoption, family dynamics, and what it means to center adoptees—especially Black adoptees—in every conversation. This is a raw, necessary look at the assumptions we carry about family, care, and who gets to be believed.

In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines, Zaira is joined by her editor, cinephile, and dear friend J Way. Together, they dive into how adoption narratives are portrayed in film and television, from tropes like the “grateful orphan” to more realistic depictions of systemic harm. J Way shares their experience as a transracial adoptee, the cultural erasure they endured, and the healing power of chosen family, storytelling, and visual media. This powerful conversation unpacks the surveillance, silence, and saviorism that often surround adoption—and what it means to reclaim your story through art and truth.

In this episode, we cover:

(00:28) J Way’s story: growing up adopted with two sisters in a white household
 (03:11) Surveillance, culture loss, and being banned from speaking Spanish
 (05:33) How film became a safe space and helped process adoption trauma
 (08:49) Media critiques: from Queen’s Gambit tropes to Atlanta’s searing truths
(14:52) Social media, saviorism, and adoption propaganda
(31:38) Love beyond biology: Zaira’s documentary vision on family policing
(37:33) The harm and manipulation of “open” adoptions
(47:07) “It’s not about blood”: media rhetoric, savior narratives, and erasure

Call To Action:

Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines on your favorite podcast platform. Follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for deeper content and community.

• Website: adopteescrossinglines.com
• Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines
• TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_
• BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social
• Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack

Connect with J Way:

• TikTok: @its_yagirl_jway
• Bluesky: @itsjway.bsky.social

Work With Me:

Email [email protected] for brand partnerships, sponsorships, or collaboration inquiries.

Editing by J Way

Special thanks to J Way for editing this episode. To collaborate with her, email [email protected].

In this solo episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines, Zaira dives deep into the power and necessity of mutual aid. Drawing from personal reflection, historical examples like the Black Panther Party and the Young Lords, and global efforts from Sudan to Florida, this episode highlights how mutual aid has always been about survival. Zaira explores how mutual aid rejects systems of exploitation and centers community care as a form of resistance—especially for marginalized communities continuously neglected by the state.

In this episode, we cover:
(00:20) What mutual aid is, how it differs from charity, and why it’s essential for survival.
(05:13) Historical examples of mutual aid in action—from the Black Panther Party to the Young Lords.
(12:35) How mutual aid shows up today across the globe and in local communities.
(17:36) The call to practice mutual aid in our daily lives and how storytelling is a form of digital resistance.

Call To Action:
Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts, follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for more content and community:

Website: adopteescrossinglines.com
Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines
BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social
TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_
Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack

Listen to these episodes next:

Community: A powerful solo episode exploring the importance of community for adoptees and system-impacted people—how it’s built, sustained, and why it’s critical for healing.

Work With Me:
Email [email protected] for brand partnerships and business inquiries.

Editing by J. Way (AV Editor)
Special thanks to J. Way for editing the podcast. To collaborate with her, email her at [email protected].

Adoptee Storytelling & Film Advocacy

In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines, Zaira sits down with Alexandra, a British and American domestic transracial adoptee who grew up in her birth country of Hong Kong. Alexandra is the festival director of the Adoptee Film Fest, a global in-person and online film festival amplifying adoptee-centered films by adoptee filmmakers. They discuss her journey of navigating identity, community, and storytelling, and how the Adoptee Film Fest came to be. Alexandra shares her experience of growing up in a segregated society, her birth search, and the importance of creating adoptee-centered spaces in media.

In this episode, we cover:

(00:20) Introduction to Alexandra and her background as a British and American domestic transracial adoptee. (03:13) The impact of growing up in Hong Kong and navigating identity in a segregated society. (10:19) Alexandra’s birth search journey and the challenges of finding community and validation. (20:27) The inception of the Adoptee Film Fest and its importance for the adoptee community. (27:37) The role of storytelling and community building through film. (38:03) Alexandra’s reflections on adoptee representation in media and future plans for the Adoptee Film Fest.

Call To Action:

Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts, follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for more content and community:

Website: adopteescrossinglines.com
Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines
BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social
TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_
Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack

Work With Me:

Email [email protected] for brand partnerships and business inquiries.

Editing by J. Way (AV Editor)
Special thanks to J. Way for editing the podcast. To collaborate with her, email her at [email protected].

Root Work and Resilience: The Fight for Black Families

In this episode of Adoptees Crossing Lines, Zaira sits down with Tamara and Tracey Robertson, sisters, healers, and advocates serving as Healers in Residence with Movement for Family Power. Together, they discuss their journey of resisting the harms of the family policing system, while centering Black birth traditions, ancestral wisdom, and community healing. From childhood foundations of faith and service to their powerful doula work, this conversation is a testament to the resilience and power of Black families protecting their own.

In this episode, we cover:

• (03:03) What led Tamara and Tracey to do the healing work they do today.
• (07:41) Their introduction to the family policing system and how it fueled their advocacy.
• (16:02) Tamara’s story of caring for her brother and keeping him out of the system.
• (22:04) Doula work and challenges Black families face during pregnancy, birth, and postpartum care.
• (32:10) The erasure of Black birth traditions and the need for advocacy in hospital settings.
• (39:32) What it means to be a Healer in Residence with Movement for Family Power and disrupting the family policing system through love and community.

Call To Action:

Subscribe to Adoptees Crossing Lines wherever you listen to podcasts, follow us on social media, and subscribe to our Substack for more content and community:

• Website: adopteescrossinglines.com
• Instagram: @adopteescrossinglines
• BlueSky: adopteecrossing.bsky.social
• TikTok: @adopteescrossinglines_
• Substack: Adoptees Crossing Lines Substack

Connect with Tamara Robertson:

• Instagram: @queeeentam
• Email: [email protected]
• Movement for Family Power: movementforfamilypower.org

Listen to these episodes next:

• Alan’s Episode: An insightful conversation with Alan, an abolitionist and advocate deeply rooted in efforts to dismantle the family policing system. Alan shares their journey of understanding the harmful impacts of the system, their personal experiences, and their vision for transformative change.
• Dorothy Roberts’ Episode: A powerful interview with Dorothy Roberts, acclaimed scholar and author of Torn Apart. Dorothy discusses the historical and present-day harms of the family policing system, offering a compelling argument for abolition and highlighting how systemic racism continues to harm Black families.

Work With Me:

Email [email protected] for brand partnerships and business inquiries.

Editing by J. Way (AV Editor)

Special thanks to J. Way for editing the podcast. To collaborate with her, email her at [email protected].

In this episode, we explore the complexities of adoption, privilege, and the narratives that shape our understanding of family. Through personal stories and critical reflections, we unpack the ways in which adoption is often framed as an unquestionable good while overlooking the systemic issues at play. We discuss the intersection of race, class, and power in adoption, the impact on adoptees, and the importance of centering their voices. This conversation challenges dominant narratives and invites listeners to consider the broader implications of adoption beyond individual experiences. 

Send us a text

Send us a text

Send us a text

Keshia 

The child welfare system is waging war on Black families, and Keshia Adeniyi-Dorsey is on the front lines. In this episode, she shares her journey from foster child to family defender, exposing the racist roots of CPS and the urgent need for change.

Keisha breaks down her tactics for protecting families during CPS investigations, from refusing home entry to shutting down fishing expeditions. Her success rates are fantastic: 95.8% of parental rights protected and 93.7% of families reunified.

"We already know, and we've already done in the past, like, right? Like, took care of ourselves, we took care of everybody else's kids too, right? We don't need the system to do it." 

What we discussed 

(00:23) Meet Keshia Adeniyi-Dorsey

(01:37) Adoptions and Safe Families Act

(06:08) Reality of CPS investigations

(12:17) Protecting families during CPS investigations

(17:11) Reuniting 93.7% of families 

(23:46) Challenges of advocating for families OR Dealing with incompetence

(28:56) We don’t need police for that OR The color of the system OR  Black families don’t need CPS OR We don’t need help OR Not everyone needs help

(35:33) Affording counsel 

(43:39) Truth to power

Links

Connect with Keshia: Website | LinkedIn

Follow us on social media: Twitter | Instagram | Tiktok

Credits

Special thanks to Samuel Oyedele for editing our podcast, support his work on Instagram or e-mail him at [email protected]