Anti-wave

We can’t be racist! We have, like, 17 black listeners! OK… it might be more like 15, it depends on how you count them. Join Robert and Ira as they discuss AM I RACIST? and share their top 5 DEI movies. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a white guy who sees the insanity of diversity equity inclusion (DEI) programs, and you go on a crusade to understand the liberal agenda, and you attend seminars to appreciate the minorities’ plight but that doesn’t work, and then you tell people you’re a DEI expert and you’ve studied what it’s like to be a minority and you are bent on showing others our racist ways and you get people to sign a petition to rename the George Washington Monument the George Floyd Monument and to paint it black and make it bigger and people sign the petition, and you talk to a black auto repair shop guy who doesn’t see the evils of what you’re talking about, and you go to a redneck bar but the beer drinking tattooed hard ass dudes in there don’t understand what the fuck you’re talking about, and you conduct a seminar and bring in your uncle who once told a racist joke years ago and the attendees get royally pissed at him, and eventually you meet with a lady who wrote the definitive book on DEI and as a reparation you talk her into giving a few dollars to a black man, and you end up having a meal with your racist joke-telling uncle, then this podcast is for you!

This week is one of the most lighthearted shows we’ve had in a long time. After watching two hilarious comedies back to back, it was a laugh riot discussing just how hilarious they both were! Join Robert and Ira as they discuss, THE GOOD SON and WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT KEVIN, and share their top 5 fucked-up families. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a married woman with a son who just happens to be a fucking psychopath with no empathy and no moral compass and he’s a fucking evil son of a bitch and he torments his little sister, kills animals, and gets off on hurting and killing people, and since you’re this evil monster’s mother, you’re at your wits end and you hate to admit it but your kid is no good and the world is better off if he falls off a cliff or ends up in jail, then this podcast is for you!

This week's episode might be called THE GREAT ESCAPE, but sadly, you're still trapped with us. Join Robert and Ira as they discuss THE GREAT ESCAPE and share their top 5 ball scenes. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a hotshot flyboy who’s in a German prisoner of war camp during World War II and you’re kind of cocky and want to escape but not with the others, instead you escape with your little Scottish buddy and get caught twice, and when one of the escape tunnels is discovered, your buddy has a breakdown and walks to the barbed wire and is gunned down by the German guards and you decide to be part of the team and join the mass breakout and you escape again and intentionally get caught so you can tell the others what’s on the other side, and they dig, and make clothes, and forge documents, but things go wrong when a forger goes blind and a tunnel digger is claustrophobic, but you finally tunnel out and it’s too short, but you make it to the woods and steal a motorcycle but the Germans are in hot pursuit and they capture you in the barbed wire and you’re escorted back to the camp and you find out they killed 50 of the escapees and you go back to the cooler and bounce a ball, then this podcast is for you!

Better listen to this episode all the way to the end on this one, gang. Not gonna say who it is, but somebody gets a spankin’! Join Robert and Ira as they discuss THE BAD SEED and share their top 5 creepy kids. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a cute little girl in a cute dress and you’re a bad ass, not only that, you’re a total bitch with no feelings for others, and not only that, you’re a fucking killer, yep you killed a boy because he got a medal at school and your mother suspects you’re not a good person, so she’s really the bitch, and the parents of the dead boy visit you and your mom and the dead boy’s mom is a stone cold drunk, and your mom is pissing you off because she suspects you may have killed the kid, and then others come to the house and have an intellectual talk with your mom about the psychology of why people do bad things all that nature/nurture stuff and your mom doesn’t love you anymore, and you kill a handyman because he knows the truth about what a fucking bitch you are and while you’re out walking in a thunderstorm, a lightning bolt zaps the shit out of you, then this podcast is for you!

Oh, boy! Wanna listen to a couple of white guys complain about the entertainment industry and life in general for almost two hours! They made a movie about it! Join Robert and Ira as they discuss MY DINNER WITH ANDRE and share their top 5 dinner scenes. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be an average frumpy dude and you’re going to a restaurant to have dinner with a man you haven’t seen in years, and you two talk about life and he goes on and on with his pseudo-intellectual, self-centered, self-absorbed heady bullshit about life, and you defend your luxury and comforts of modern day life and when your dining buddy feels you need to sleep with a native tribe in the mountains and feel the cold to truly feel alive, you tell him you like your electric blanket, and then there’s more pseudo-intellectual, self-centered self-absorbed heady bullshit, but at least he pays the bill and you go home and tell your girlfriend all about your dinner, then this podcast is for you!

This week, we play a new version of cowboys and Indians called Homos and Hopi. Join Robert and Ira as they discuss HORIZON: AN AMERICAN SAGA - CHAPTER 1 and share their top 5 long-ass movies. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a pioneer in the Old West while Indians burn down a town and a hot mother and her hot daughter hide in a makeshift cellar, and you realize you’ve got to head West and while you’re in another town, a fetching hot whore flirts with you and you shack up with her, but a bad dude shows up who is about to kill your whore girlfriend and her kid, so you shoot him and then the other bad dudes are royally pissed and they’re after you, and the mother and daughter are rescued from the makeshift cellar, and the cavalry is there to deal with them Injuns, but those bad dudes are hot on your trail and you lead a wagon train outta there and head toward a town called Horizon and two ne’er-do-wells watch a lovely but upper crust woman bathe and the upper crust husband asks you to talk to the two voyeurs but that doesn’t go well, and the hot daughter gives a gift to the cavalry men as they head off to war, and then your hot whore girlfriend fucks another dude, and then she fucks you and leaves you, then this podcast is for you!

Seems like all the Ashley Madison users got exactly what they wanted: to get screwed. Join Robert and Ira as they discuss ASHLEY MADISON: SEX, LIES & SCANDAL and share their top 5 cheating spouse movies. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a website, that’s right a website and your name is Ashley Madison and you were created to help married men cheat on their wives and you became an Internet sensation as a shit load of married men signed up to have affairs, but then you were hacked and all the men’s names were released and it resulted in divorces and suicides, and one religious man with a really hot religious wife who were known for their YouTube posts of them singing karaoke songs in the car while driving with their kids in the backseat, well holy shit he got caught, and people asked if it was your fault, the hacker’s fault, or the married dude with the hot wife’s fault, and so if you want to know more, then this podcast is for you!

We’re CON-vinced you’re gonna love this week’s episode. Join Robert and Ira as they discuss MATCHSTICK MEN and share their top 5 heartbreak movies. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a con man with a con partner and you con people and you have all these fucked up habits like counting to three and turning the light switches on and off and stuttering and lots of facial tics and you find out you have a daughter you never really knew and she moves in with you and you see a shrink who gives you pills to help with your fucked up disorder, and your daughter goes on cons with you and your partner but a con goes bad when the mark realizes you switched suitcases and he chases you and your daughter and you find out she’s been in jail and you kick her out of the house and you’re out of pills and you go to the pharmacy and discover the pills are merely over-the-counter supplements and you yell at your shrink and you make up with your daughter and take her dancing, but now the mark shows up and is really pissed and your daughter shoots and kills him and you take the rap and get arrested and you’re in a hospital and your shrink shows up and you give him the password to your safe deposit box but you’re not really in a hospital and you’ve been set up and your partner fucked you over and you get out of there and you find out your daughter is not your daughter and you’ve been royally set up and a year later you’re selling carpet and your daughter who is not your daughter shows up, then this podcast is for you!

“You forgot the briefcase. YOU FORGOT THE BRIEF CASE!” Join Robert and Ira as they discuss FALLING DOWN and share their top 5 snapped characters. Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to be a middle-age dude with a buzz cut who’s stuck in downtown LA traffic on a hot day and you ditch your car and start walking and go to a pay phone but can’t make a phone call because you don’t have a quarter so you go to a convenience store for some change and when you’re told you have to buy something you go ballistic and ransack the place and then some gang members threaten you because you’re in their hood, and you become even more of a dick at a fast food restaurant and you walk through a golf course and harass the elderly golfers, and along the way you kill a Nazi and fire a rocket launcher and your wife has left you - do you wonder why? - and a police lieutenant who is on his last day of work shoots your sorry ass and you die, then this podcast is for you!

Kinda unbelievable that a bunch of fake plastic people would award themselves for playing fake plastic people, but who can resist Ryan Gosling in bubble gum pink, anyway? I’M KEN! Join Robert and Ira along with special guest Eric Swelstad as they discuss THE OSCARS.  Listen for free through iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or Google Podcast Music.  So, if you want to know everything about the Oscars, and we mean everything from winners, losers, snubs, speeches, song performances, relevance and ratings, and Jimmy’s wildly inappropriate political jabs, then this podcast is for you!