I See What You're Saying

Apply a Framework Designed to Improve Influence and Communication | Joel Silverstone | Ep. 170


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What separates a leader who communicates with confidence from one who communicates with true influence?

In this episode, Michael Reddington sits down with Joel Silverstone, founder of This Feels Right and a former professional actor who now coaches leaders on elevating their interpersonal communication and influence. Joel blends emotional and social intelligence with his acting background to help leaders move from confident to compelling, and the framework he shares in this conversation is immediately actionable.

Joel breaks down his MOVE model, the difference between acting, reacting, and responding in real conversations, and why most people are listening to solve the problem rather than listening to understand. He also challenges the idea that validation means agreement, and explains why skipping that step is one of the most common ways leaders quietly damage trust.

What You'll Learn in This Episode

  • Why an actor's job has nothing to do with acting, and what that teaches us about presence in conversation
  • How the MOVE model (Mindset, Observe, Validate, Engage) creates momentum in even the most difficult conversations
  • The difference between reacting and responding, and why one builds trust while the other breaks it
  • Why validation is not agreement, and how skipping it quietly damages relationships
  • How to listen without solving the problem, and why that skill matters more than most leaders realize
  • What the "clue bird" reveals about the moments leaders most commonly miss
  • How to change the script when a conversation goes sideways, and why breathing is the first move
  • The difference between motivating and manipulating, and how to tell which one you are actually doing

Chapters:

  • (00:00) Introduction to Joel Silverstone and the MOVE Model
  • (04:22) Why an Actor's Job Is to Move the Other Person
  • (06:13) Breaking Down the MOVE Model: Mindset, Observe, Validate, Engage
  • (09:03) How to Stop Making the Other Person the Problem
  • (13:02) Observation Skills and the Closed Circuit Camera Technique
  • (17:14) Why Validation Is Not Agreement and How to Practice It
  • (21:29) The "Yes, And" Framework and Listening Without Solving
  • (26:15) Driving Engagement When Someone Won't Play Ball
  • (31:00) How to Change the Script When Conversations Get Challenging
  • (35:12) The Difference Between Motivating and Manipulating

Links and Resources:

  • This Feels Right - https://www.thisfeelsright.ca
  • Joel Silverstone | LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/joel-silverstone

Sponsor Links:

  • InQuasive: http://www.inquasive.com/
  • Humintell: Body Language - Reading People - Humintell
  • Enter Code INQUASIVE25 for 25% discount on your online training purchase.
  • International Association of Interviewers: Home (certifiedinterviewer.com)

Podcast Production Services by EveryWord Media

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I See What You're SayingBy Michael Reddington

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