About a year ago, Judith and Alina joined Rob and Chris of the Sad Dads Club for a super fun and casual Instagram live!

We talked about the legacy of our respective loss work (ALAIL and SDC), how our grief has changed over the years, finding a grief support tribe, and so much more.

If you'd rather watch this Instagram live, you can do so HERE!

We'll be back with a regular episode next week!

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Things we talk about in this episode:

- The Sad Dads Club (website, Instagram)

- ALAIL | The Sad Dads Club

- ALAIL | Father's Day Wishes from the Sad Dads Club

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Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!

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Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

This week's episode was originally going to be about many things, but once we got started, we realized that there is one topic that we needed to talk about: abortion.

We discuss the implications of restrictive abortion laws, the personal nature of abortion decisions, and the importance of voting to influence reproductive rights. We cannot emphasize enough the need for equitable access to this very important type of healthcare.

Two notes:

1. If discussing abortion access is triggering to you because of the nature of your loss (i.e. TFMR), we welcome you to skip this one. It is all we talk about.

2. If you support limiting or eliminating access to abortion and would like to discuss this with us, we are open to that, but please use our Instagram DMs instead of a public comment. We do not want the folks in #1 to have any more exposure to these viewpoints than they already do.

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Previous episodes of As Long As I'm Living about abortion or TFMR:

- Abortion is Healthcare

- TFMR is Baby Loss, with Hadley's Mom Jill

- When "Choice" Doesn't Feel Like a Choice, an interview about TFMR with Adelyn's Mom Alyssa

- Maliyah's Story, as told by her mom, Emily

- When Your Pregnancy is Killing You, an interview about TFMR with Emily, Maliyah's Mom

Abortion Information and Resources:

- Guttmacher Institute

- CDC Abortion Findings and Reports

- AbortionFinder.org

- Center for Reproductive Rights

US Voting Resources:

- Vote.gov

- Vote.org

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Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠⁠⁠⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

Are we... happy?

Welcome to our most recent life update, where we talk about how completely, permanently fucked up we are... and also how much joy we have in our lives in a way we haven't since Aiden and Quinn died. Both/and.

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Things we talk about in this episode:

- ALAIL | Opening a Time Capsule (and the Instagram post where you can see Judith and Aiden at the coffee shop)

- ALAIL | The One Where Judith Made a New Friend, an interview with Judith's friend Mel

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Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠⁠⁠⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

Meet Marnina!

Judith and Marnina have known each other for 15 years... but they didn't really know each other until they each lost a baby.

Judith lost Aiden first, and when Marnina lost her daughter Michal the next year, Judith became a lifeline for her. This was incredibly meaningful for Judith, who had needed so much care and support from others over the previous year and finally got a chance to pay it forward.

Now, Marnina is a few years out, and she channels the way Judith cared for her as she pays it forward to the newly bereaved in her community. The circle of loss is a devastating, beautiful thing.

:::

This episode is sponsored in memory of Harper, on her second birthday. You can sponsor an episode of As Long As I'm Living ⁠here⁠.

Harper's mom Erin wanted to shout out a few organizations that have been meaningful to her since Harper's loss:

- @KindermournCLT: KinderMourn is an absolute lifesaver for families who have lost children. They have an annual Duck Race every year that celebrates all babies gone too soon.

- @Madelynsfund: Madelyn's Fund supports NICU families in NC and SC. They paid our funeral costs when Harper died.

- @SaylorsStory sends beautiful, meaningful comfort bags to Moms.

- @MotherofWilde - creates the most beautiful prints. We have one hanging in our front foyer of our sweet girl.

- @evolvehealthclt_supportgroup is a monthly group in Charlotte open to moms who have been through any type of loss. Dr. Sydney Fenton is a huge advocate here for the loss community and the group has brought some amazing moms together.

You can connect with Harper's Mom (and receive a free copy of the resource guide she's put together for loss parents for Harper's first birthday) here: [email protected]

:::

Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠⁠⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠⁠⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

In case you missed it, Alina is pregnant! And it's hard.

She went on a vacation a few weeks ago and faced her first "pregnancy after loss" gauntlet of questions that were well-meaning but ultimately extremely triggering. Listen to find out how she dealt with it, and to hear what advice Judith has for her and others in similar situations.

:::

This episode is sponsored in memory of baby Arthur! You can sponsor an episode of As Long As I'm Living here.

Arthur's favorite book: The Moon is Always Round

Lyndi asked us to shout-out her favorite loss organization, Return to Zero Hope!

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Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

Judith gave birth to her baby boy a few weeks ago, and while the birth was smooth... the subsequent hours and days were not. It was extremely traumatic for both Judith and Alina, who were acutely reminded that babies can and do die.

Thankfully, Judith's son got great care and is alive and well, and they are adjusting to life at home as a family of 5ish (2 adults, 1 dead child, 2 living children, and 1 dog).

This episode was recorded on the day after Judith's birth, while she was in the hospital, and it was all very fresh. We hope you enjoy this episode, but it is pretty raw, and for those with NICU trauma may be triggering. As always, please take good care of yourself and only listen if it feels safe for you.

:::

Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

Yes, this is a pregnancy announcement ♥️

:::

Things we talk about in this episode:

- ALAIL | Breathing After Loss, an Interview About Parenting After Loss with Zayn's Mom Katie

- ALAIL | First Time Moms for the Second Time, More About Parenting After Loss with Zayn's Mom Katie

:::

Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

Today on the podcast, we're welcoming back our resident grief therapist: Dr. Denise Mandel!

We talk to Dr. Denise allllll about support groups. What are they, how do they help, how can you find one? We also talk about why some people DON'T like support groups, and other ways that you can find support in your loss if the group you tried to join isn't working.

Dr. Denise is actively recruiting for a new baby loss support group, so if you've been looking for a kind, supportive provider and a warm, welcoming group of bereaved parents... this is your sign! Reach out to her at [email protected].

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The information shared in this episode is for educational and informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health treatment or therapy. If you are struggling with suicidal thoughts and think you may be a danger to yourself, please reach out immediately to the National Suicide Prevention hotline (800-273-8255) in the U.S. ⁠Linked here⁠ are additional resources in the United States. ⁠Linked here⁠ are resources for Canada. ⁠Linked here⁠ are resources for the U.K. ⁠Linked here⁠ are resources for Australia. ⁠Linked here⁠ are global resources. You are not alone.

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Things we talk about in this episode:

-@griefwithdrdenise on Instagram

- ALAIL |An Incomparable Loss, an interview with Christine, Miranda's Mom

- ALAIL |Grief Needs a Witness, an interview with Dr. Denise Mandel

- ALAIL |There Are No Silver Linings, an Interview about Making Meaning in Grief with Dr. Denise Mandel

:::

Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

Hi all! It's a holiday week here in the US, so we're taking the opportunity to release an Instagram live we did back in May to the feed.

In this live, we mainly talk about a then-recent episode of the podcast in which we tell the stories of our losses. If you haven't listened to that episode yet, listen HERE and then come back and listen to all the commentary :)

If you'd rather watch the Instagram Live instead of listening to it (highly recommend), you can do that HERE!

We'll see you back here next week with a brand new episode!

:::

Things we talk about in this episode:

- ALAIL | Long Story Short, I Survived

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Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.

In this episode, Judith talks about how she's prepping as she approaches the birth of a (hopefully alive) new baby.

How is she thinking about naming her son, after her first son died? What of Aiden's clothes will she put on the new baby? Will she do the same religious traditions, in the same way? How is her mental health?

Preparation for a new baby is always a huge undertaking, but it's even more intense when one of your babies has died.

Update: Judith's baby was born, and he's alive!

:::

Things we talk about in this episode:

- ALAIL | Maybe Baby (Judith in labor with her daughter)

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Support As Long As I'm Living podcast at ⁠buymeacoffee.com/alailpodcast⁠ OR buy buying our MERCH at ⁠bonfire.com/store/alailpodcast⁠!

:::

Follow As Long As I'm Living on Instagram at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠@aslongasimlivingpodcast⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, send us an email at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠[email protected]⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠, or visit us at ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠anchor.fm/aslongasimliving⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠! We would love to hear from you!

:::

As Long As I'm Living is a podcast about life, love, and laughter after infant loss. Judith and Alina are rebuilding Happier Ever After one day at a time despite excruciating grief and trauma and offering support to grievers of all flavors, but especially those who have lost a baby to SIDS, infant death, birth accidents, stillbirth, TFMR, ectopic pregnancy, or miscarriage.