Season 2 Episode 1 - AI Am Working Here - As Per my Last Podcast

Episode summary:

• 🎙️ Eric kicks things off by channeling his inner Seinfeld and pointing out that despite Zoom saying "recording in progress" it is in fact only starting when she says that. Just saying.

• ⏰ We determine the true definition of wealth: never setting an alarm, not yachts, Lambos, or whatever billionaires pretend matters.

• 😬 The Sunday Scaries have metastasized into an always-on dread cycle, powered by Teams, Slack, email, and the knowledge that weekends are fake.

• 🏭 We long for extinct jobs where you clock out, go home, and don’t think about work—like a dinosaur, but happier.

• 🤖 Automation is replacing everyone except the least competent people in leadership, who somehow remain fully immune.

• ❄️ Living on the rain/snow border means weather forecasts are vibes, plow trucks are optional, and black ice is a personal enemy.

• 💰 We deep-dive Powerball math and conclude that a million dollars is absolutely life-changing, despite what delusional rich people claim.

• 🧾 If we won the lottery, we’d still go to work—just to force the company to fire us and then collect unemployment out of pure principle.

• 👔 Career advice from the McDonald’s CEO confirms what you already know: nobody cares about your career, and you are 100% a replaceable tool.

• 🎸 AI can now write, code, animate, and make music—ushering in a bold new era where speed beats quality and everyone confidently ships garbage.

As Per My Last Podcast - Season 1 Episode 23 - Real AI for my Sham Friends and Champagne for my Reel Friends

In this episode:

• The rich, the powerful, and criminals aren’t separate groups — they’re just LinkedIn connections away.

• The world’s greatest art thief got immunity because he stole too much art, proving “too big to jail” is a real career path.

• Art is basically money laundering with vibes: “Why is this worth $3 million?” “Because I like it.”

• NFTs were just modern art scams with worse visuals and Jake Paul instead of a monocle-wearing dealer.

• A mob hitman tried to destroy evidence, lit himself on fire twice, and was foiled by… an electric grill.

• Corporate America’s favorite power move: letting you leave early like it’s a Christmas miracle you earned.

• Working in an office before holidays felt like prison, except with Excel instead of yard time.

• Blackout Wednesday died because alcohol is expensive, Uber is expensive, and staying home with AI is free and validating.

• AI laughs at all your jokes, which explains why humans are suddenly intolerable.

• We’ve achieved peak convenience, peak isolation, and somehow more kidney failure — progress!

As Per My Last Podcast Season 1 Episode 22 - Pro Athletes and Con Men -

In this episode:

• Keyboard shortcuts: where grown adults forget how letters work and accidentally print 15 copies of their own incompetence.

• Screenshots: the corporate version of “I’m not stealing… I’m archiving.”

• File names: because nothing says “organizational system” like saving a budget meeting screenshot as B1_Final_FINAL_wtf.png.

• Excel VLOOKUP: the skill you relearn every six months like it’s the plot of Memento.

• VR safety training: now with 100% more simulated workplace death to really motivate you.

• Drunk goggles: teaching college kids what it’s like to be drunk if drunk meant blindfolded, dizzy, and legally unfit to pour water into a cup ten feet away.

• Drunken jam sessions: moments where you’re convinced you’re inventing the next Beatles track… until sober-you hears the recording.

• Kids and music: where “classic rock” gets reviewed by 10-year-olds as “mid” and every rapper is named “Lil Something.”

• Kanye samples: that confusing moment when you think the grocery store is playing Kanye, but no — it’s just Al Green being sampled for the 47th time.

• Musical talent: the Nashville Rule — the person playing to eight people in a bar is still better at music than anyone you know, including you and your entire gene pool.

In this episode:

• Dresden was bombed to dust, rebuilt, and still looks better than any U.S. city built on purpose.

• Currywurst: Germany’s version of late-night pizza, but with swords involved.

• Donair guys slicing meat like samurai chefs—10/10 would let them duel for my sandwich.

• Germany: Home of sausages, potatoes, and zero water consumption. Hydration is for cowards.

• Do Germans ever poop? Medical mystery of the century.

• American trains: show up when they feel like it. Maybe.

• Florida’s high-speed rail: powered by human sacrifice.

• Espresso everywhere. Filter coffee is an endangered species.

• Boeing whistleblowers mysteriously unalived—totally normal, nothing to see here.

  #aspermylastpodcast #funny #europeantravel

Eric returns from Germany, where the national pastime is staring silently until you emotionally unravel.

Sick days: apparently it’s socially acceptable to work yourself into a dirt nap, but God forbid you take a Tuesday off.

Doctor’s notes: one coworker forged one to go golfing — HIPAA breach? Maybe. Icon? Absolutely.

Greg and Eric ricochet the following thoughts:

B-actors from anti-harassment training are weird to see in other stuff.

AI is not to blame for youth unemployment because Japan and Europe aint having that problem.

AI voices for 800 #’s still have heavy Indian accents for some reason…

Pumpkin tastes like nothing, like the vegetable itself.

Gen X and older drank a domestic beer and that was it…for life. A simpler time.

Appropriately for our 21st episode, we talk beer in all it’s wonderful varieties and price points.

Turns out Eric and Greg will do pretty much whatever for a free t-shirt.

18th Episode summary

00:00 – 01:00 | “We have six subscribers and possibly one fan — me.”
Celebrating 20 episodes and redefining success in units of pure delusion.

01:00 – 02:00 | The Rowboat of Corporate Misery
Corporate life = one big, leaky boat. Everyone’s on board, and nobody’s steering.

02:00 – 05:00 | Review Season: The Annual Gaslighting
HR emails roll in: “Take this e-learning on how to fill out your own disappointment.”

05:00 – 08:00 | “Exceeds Expectations” — The Unicorn Rating
To get a 5% raise, you must donate blood to the CEO’s mother.

08:00 – 12:00 | Copy, Paste, Collect Your ‘Meets Expectations’
Greg admits he’s been recycling last year’s self-review for three years. Nobody noticed.

12:00 – 15:00 | Promotions for People Who ‘Seem Fun’
Raise logic: Work hard → ignored. Golf → promoted.

15:00 – 20:00 | The Office, The Paper & The Power of Having No Opinion
At work, having opinions is a liability. Best to say: “What do you think?” until retirement.

20:00 – 28:00 | Journalism, Yelp, and the Michelin Tire Man
Journalists are broke, Yelp is dying, and the world’s most feared food critic is literally a tire.

28:00 – 32:00 | How Cable Companies Buried Themselves in Wires
Two tech geniuses wonder why no one thought to use customer data… while not getting paid for their own ideas.

32:00 – 33:00 | Collaboration, Think Tanks, and D’s Nuts
A heartfelt ending about teamwork, innovation, and starting a nut stand. Because capitalism.

Greg and Eric get funky with:

Why does everybody say "welcome aboard" when you do intros at a new job

Most jobs are not " living the dream" or "another day in paradise"

Greg has a bad healthcare experience

Both of us have four letter names constantly mispronounced and spelled

We talk Buffalo Bills Hard Knocks and what it'd be like if they did an office version

We talk executives making big choices with coin flips

We offer Canadian real estate advice

We also offer reasons to love your terrible job

Greg and Eric wax poetic on:

-All the bad "did you labor on labor day jokes"

-Work humor vs actual funny shit

-Howard Stern hanging up the microphone after becoming what he used to rail against as a penthouse living millionaire

-Customer's that don't take no for an answer

-Talk about how "pointless" jobs are often not pointless for the ones doing them

-Often people that succeed do so from political prowess rather than any excellence or actual value to the company.

-We admit to membership in the lollipop guild and an undying affinity for the socks on the dead wicked witch of the west.

As Per My Last Podcast Season 1 Episode 15 - "Have you tried smacking them across the face?"

Greg and Eric rev the old six cylinders on:

Gen Z and their incessant awkwardness, and need for parenting from their bosses.

Greg gets very sick on a boat

Eric tells stories about ninth grade ruler-based child abuse

Eric waxes poetic about his love for the local news

We both rail the daylights out of the idiotic Cracker Barrel and Eddie Bauer rebrands. God save us if this is what marketing becomes.