The news is designed to keep you fucking miserable.  Turn off the news to escape its stress-inducing cycle and rediscover peace.  Stop being anxious and divided by assholes who sell more ads the more we watch.  Instead, immerse yourself in a book for a timeless escape, spend time in nature to reconnect with the world, or bond with friends to feel united. By shifting focus away from the news, you can reduce anxiety and foster a sense of calm and connection. 

Fuck the news.

Are you plagued by shit thoughts? Telling you you've failed or that you're not worthy. F that shit. This episode of focuses on the phrase "don't believe everything you think" to help you achieve a more peaceful life. The guided meditation encourages you to visualize thoughts as a parade, distinguishing between positive and negative ones. 

Challenge negative thoughts by asking if it is effing kind or true? Ask if you would say shit like that to a friend? If not, don't poison yourself with it.

Techniques like gratitude and positive affirmations are introduced to replace negative thoughts. The episode concludes by reminding listeners they control their thoughts and should focus on what deserves their attention, reinforcing their value and strength.

Because you are a gift to the mothereffing universe.

Start by sitting quietly and slow your breathing. A wise person once said that the only question that matters is, what are you fucking avoiding? Breathe slowly and think about that. What shit do you not want to deal with? First thing, it's probably not as big a fucking disaster as you think. It's just that you feel craptastic about it.

Keep breathing slowly and evenly. Now give it a name and say hello. Hello, Mr. Impending Doom Shitstorm. Hello, Mr. Unwanted Financial Bullshit. Naming it makes that crap a little smaller. Keep breathing slowly and face that fucker you just named. Remember, shoveling shit feels better than I'm feeling like shit.

You fucking got this.