Background Noise

This week the lovely, English-accented, sex & relationships expert Lola joined us in studio to help answer some listener questions about sex, love & relationships! How do you get out of the friend zone? How do you help a woman get her rocks off? How do the Background Noise boys make love to women? When is too soon for a woman to put out?

How do you go from just seeing each other to a formal relationship? These and other questions were answered, so grab your Vaseline, light some candles & incense, and listen up! It's the hottest & sexiest episode of Background Noise yet! Use protection as you listen, and please call us the next day, okay? We are NOT sluts (okay, maybe Jon is).

Strap on a party hat and light up some sprinklers, 'cuz it's the year end special of Background Noise! Join us as we take a look back at some of the biggest news stories from 2011, as well as the best and worst of movies, music and other things.

Helping us along on this episode were a bunch of our listeners, who Skyped in to share with us their thoughts, ideas & opinions; levels of realness that were once unknown were reached. The world might end once 2012 hits, so hurry up and check this episode out! That way your life will not have been lived in vain. It will have been lived listening to 3 jerkwads (Jon was away big game hunting in Kenya), and that's okay, man.

It's pretty clear that Christmas is near when you look at the topics from this week's show (not really). It all kicked off with talk about the deaths of Kim Jong Il (what happens with Korea now?), Slim Dunkin (how to avoid getting shot) and Christopher Hitchens (who the hell is that?). From there, a discussion/rant about the sensitivity and censorship issues surrounding homosexual and transgender issues came up. You will listen and agree or be mad; either way, it'll give you something to think about and talk about.

On the lighter side of things, we talked about the World Masturbation Champion from Japan, porno-watching woes, the magic of bidets, and the difficulties that can arise when one has a boner. Finish it all off with a sexy story that may or may not involve Santa having sex with a sleepy-eyed man and you have yourself a festive episode that will make your Christmas-time warmer than your belly after 7 rum & egg nogs. Happy Holidays!

Background Noise is back to hit you in your ears like a bazooka blast! KAPOOOOOOOOW! This week, rapper P. Cain was in studio to talk about his upcoming album, "A Day In The Life"! We also played a game where a statement was read, and then we all had to guess whether it came from a piece of writing in a men's magazine or was said by a rapist.

#1 fan Ashley Rose gave us Christmas gifts to open on-air, too, and we took a look at the 2011 Video Game Awards. We're pretty much the fountain of youth. So bathe in us, won't you? WON'T YOU?!?!?!

This episode is so fun & educational that Bill Nye AND Beakman would listen and become astounded. There was talk of car accidents, the ridiculous things that various rap stars and pop stars expect in their dressing room before a show (we also talked about what we would want), and a list of "Christmas Work Party Dos and Don'ts".

If that's not enough to make you hot and bothered in the pants, we also discussed the most important and influential games from the good ol' NES days, up to and including PS1! Why are you still reading this with your eyes? You should be listening with your ears. Go. Now! It's dangerous to go alone! Take this (episode of Background Noise) with you!

This week on Background Noise we honoured one of our greatest inspirations & influences, whom has just passed away recently: comedian & genius, Patrice O'Neal. After that we discussed scandalous women and the various whore tricks that we've been subjected to over the years, so if you're a "Ghost of Whore's Past", you might not want to listen.

But really, the highlight of this episode, especially for you nerdy sorts, is when we created our own "fighting game" and chose our favorite fighters, including Predator, Invader Zim & Gir, Lion-O, Skeletor, Uncle Phil, Peter Venkman, Indiana Jones, and a bunch of others.

It was a discussion so good that it might make you slap your mama, so if you live with her still, make sure that she's not too close by when you listen.

Last week we went heavy with the video games, so this week we balanced it out with some basketball talk (lockout, what's going on in the off-season), movie talk (Hangover 2, Bad Teacher, Beginners) and hip-hop talk! Local hip-hop trailblazers Ambition & Uncle Fester were in studio to talk with us about their music & plans, the local scene (artists, upcoming releases, etc.), major label releases, who is changing the game, etc. We also watched Background Noise's local television debut live on-air. We're big stars now so appreciate us like the ones that you used to collect in Mario 64. We're an awesome video game for your ears, so pick up your controllers and play... with... us... wait, what?

Here's a breakdown of highlights from this stellar episode: a re-cap of the amazingness that was Hal-Con 2011, the BC teens who got in trouble for "trolling sexual predators", more "Occupy Halifax" talk (including stuff about the hatred for Mayor Peter Kelly), a review of the new Elder Scrolls game "Skyrim," annoying pop-up ads, fake links on Facebook, & Livejasmin, the Halifax masseuse who was jerking off on his clients, and a fascinating new idea about how police officers should be chosen. Pour yourself some wine and sprawl out on a bearskin rug by the fireplace because we're about to make love to your ears!

Michael McPhee & Annie Valentina from "The Doppler Effect Productions" joined us on this episode to talk about acting, writing plays & the art of theatre. Shit got really real. We also went through a slew of RIPs and discussed them briefly (Heavy D, Joe Frazier, Andy Rooney, Bil Keane), and read over some of Mr. Keane's HILARIOUS Family Circus comics. Oh. Oops. I meant to say completely awful Family Circus comics.

... and that's not all! We also discussed the Penn State/Paterno situation, and in the world of censorship, we talked about Brett Ratner riling the whole world up by saying a word that rhymes with Sagat. Then at one point the idea of Pokemon having sex organs came up, which led us to searching Google for the truth. Do you want to find out the truth? I thought so.

Shovel us into your ears to keep your brain burning!

Did Justin Bieber get a woman pregnant? Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries didn't last? How was "Human Centipede 2?" Can you judge people based off of their "heroes?" Have the miracles of the 21st century made us lazy and miserable? Does having shitty friends make a person more shitty? What are some new sex positions?

Okay. Easy with the questions. All of these and more are answered in this episode of Background Noise, so give us an A+ by listening to the words coming out of our mouths as they spiral into your ears and burrow into your brain.