What if instead of losing his parents, Bruce Wayne was having a bad day and found a Bible in the dirt? Well in that case, he might have become a completely different superhero, one who carries a lightsaber and feels insecure about his sexuality. Dan and Ryan take on Bibleman, with a brief diversion into a Bibleman spinoff show for toddlers featuring a singing Jim Varney (of Ernest P. Worrel fame) and a beatnik who calls the kids daddy-o. By the way, one plus one equals two.

This is a movie about miracles: freaky body horror miracles, weird baby miracles, goofy slapstick miracles, etc. A city tears itself apart over these miracles. Children are stressed that they're not allowed to read the Bible. Two local news networks go to war with each other. One bereaved news anchor takes orders from Satan (we think). Then the uppers get pissed and innocent citizens have their lives ruined. Yet somehow this all pales in comparison to the incredible third act with its shocking violent finale and a celebrity appearance for the ages. This might be Dan and Ryan's favorite film.

Do you remember back in 2020 when the government made ice cream illegal? That was because of the communist takeover of Germany. Thankfully one brave group of Christians is able to fight back with the help of a hacker. She can hack pretty much anything, even the police! Join Dan and Ryan as they learn a very important lesson about trains.

What do you get when a Canadian church with too much money combines a classic Disney movie with the story of Jesus' death and resurrection? Obviously, you get a very strange rendition of an Adele song while Simba gets crucified in the background. Dan and Ryan try to understand who this play was meant for, and wrestle with the theological implications of Mufasa's death.

Dan and Ryan are kicking things off with a rapture movie that has a lot to say about monkeys and almost nothing to say about Jesus. Gary Busey is a no-nonsense cop, Howie Mandel is a confused spiritual seeker, and Margot Kidder doesn't even realize she's in a Christian movie. Don't drink the coffee.