Carrying around unforgiveness is a burden. Imagine filling a backpack with bricks and carrying it around day after day. That’s what unforgiveness is. It’s a burden but it is a burden that you can choose to let go of at any time. You can choose to drop the backpack at any time and walk away.

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The truth is things are going to change. If we are blessed enough to live a long life, this are going to continue to change. Let’s not get mad about it or resist the change – acceptance is key.

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Bottom line: you have to recognize when something is over and make a decision either to change the situation (if it can be changed) or leave. No, it’s not easy but I know for me, it has been beneficial for my mental health.

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What was happening to me is the same thing that happens to many women my age. We get older and are no longer viewed as “doable” and somehow that translates to being less valuable, less worthy. We have been conditioned to measure our worth based on how many men want to go to bed with us. It’s the “choose me, pick me” narrative (shout out to Meredith Grey) and it has messed us up from a very early age.

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Celebrating one year of the Before I Go podcast!

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Will developing a stronger sense of empathy help to change my perspective that most people suck? I’m willing to explore that possibility.

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Peace and safety. Those are my priorities. I have never felt more peaceful or safer than I do right now. Peace and safety are the values that I treasure most and if you are coming to me with anything contrary to that be prepared to be turned away. In other words, if you cannot contribute to my peace or worse – if you attempt to disturb my peace – I will happily show you the door.

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Being wrong is not the end of the world. It is actually an opportunity for learning and growth. If you are traveling in the wrong direction, wouldn’t it be better to have that pointed out so you can go in the right direction? How foolish would it be to continue down that path just so you don’t have to say that you were wrong?

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Overreactions are dangerous and because many of us have a hard time communicating what we are feeling when we are feeling it – small things turn into big things for seemingly no reason. Some of us believe that if we ignore something it will just go away. Nothing could be further from the truth. If you have an issue and you choose not to address it – it does not go away. It festers. It grows. It’s going to come out one way or another.

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The depression is coming. I can feel it. Maybe I feel it now because I’m not drinking, and my mind is clear. Maybe I feel it now because I’m not distracted by an unsatisfying relationship. Regardless of the reason, I am grateful that I am more aware so that I can prepare.

Contact:  email - [email protected] or Instagram - @_michele_matthews