Better Divorce Podcast

Christina Caputo Fenton: Addiction is Everywhere!

Addiction does not come in a nice neat package. 

To Lead by Example is the best cure for addiction for children.

Yoga was the cherry on top. 

Meet Tina: a Boston girl who is significantly making a difference in the lives of so many suffering from addiction. 

Tina and Paulette don’t believe in accidents.  

They met on a terrible day for Tina in the Scituate Harbor parking lot that changed both of their lives for the better. Tina was standing with her brother with her head buried in her brothers arms still grieving the loss of her sister and now her father too 

2014 after the death of her dear father “the rock of the family” 

Tina found herself at 27 a single mother having to raise a little boy on her own. 

She had to grind it out and work long hours to support herself and her young son and quickly grew a loyal clientele. Tina became a master stylist and colorist and grew the confidence to open her own salon and spa that she named Marilexei hairsalan and spa. 

Tina found fitness as a way of dealing with her grief and become a Spinning and fitness instructor. 

Tina at the age of 27 knew she had developed an alcohol problem 

Needed to make a change 

Tina joined a 12 step program and changed her life 

Tina continued to attend AA meetings and doing the right thing

She then found the courage to open her own the salon 

But it wasn’t until the tragic death of her sister in 2011 

Began the "Nicola Maria Foundation" in her dedication to create education, awareness and opportunities to combat opioid addiction that significantly shifted her work and living her life purpose. 

So many people crave spirituality and enlightenment. 

So many people crave feeling accepted loved. 

So many people want to experience moving into the conscious mind. 

People will often ask me: “How do I get there?” “How do I find peace?”

Sobriety is a Journey 

Yoga is a Journey 

Yoga made the 12 steps deeper. 

The parallels between them are immeasurable.

Yoga and The Four Desires process forced me to ask the questions, the deep questions, the dark questions of who and what I am and made me dig deep, deeper than I had ever wanted to go. 

Tina is changing the stigma of addictions so many suffer in silence. 

As a resource for the community please Follow the Nicola Maria Foundation August 18th “Comics for a Cause” on Social Media. 

To contact Tina you can find her: www.marilexei.com and www.believeinchange.life 

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Rosalind Sedacca, CDC

The Voice of Child-Centered Divorce

Divorce & Co-Parenting Coach

Paulette and Rosalind met in March at the NADP conference where Rosalind was a guest panel expert on child centered divorce and parenting. 

Rosalinds words of wisdom and clarity hit a soft spot in Paulette as they connected immediately when we shared their stories of divorce.

Rosalind is the Author of: How Do I Tell the Kids About the Divorce?  

She created her book to answer that difficult question, How do I break the divorce news to him?

It’s creative, helpful and hopeful templates and scripts allow for the personalization of copy and photos to allow each child to walk through this new challenging chapter in their life.

You will find her website and network incredibly useful and practical. 

www.childcentereddivorce.com

Founder, Child-Centered Divorce Network 

Every decision we make impacts the children. Even if we are struggling with the other parent it’s always vital to remember that they will always be a part of their lives. 

Would I be making the same decision if we were still married? We find it easy to use “bad cop, good cop” with each other. But when the ego is involved or one spouse is trying to hurt the other the children suffer. 

Roselind and Paulette discuss 

What are the most common and dreadful mistakes parents make in the divorce process? 

Rosalind expertly defines and describes the extreme cases of Parent Alienation and reminds us that despite it all we are 

role models for our children 24/7.

Surprise fact! Rosalind is also and expert on dating after divorce. 

Check out her show! 

Divorce, Dating & Empowered Living Radio Show/Podcast:

https://www.goingsolomedia.com/divorce-dating-2019-shows

Dating In Mid-Life Mentor

Author: 99 Things Women Wish They Knew Before Dating After 40, 50 & Yes, 60!

www.womendatingafter40.com

www.womendatingrescue.com

www.mensdatingformula.com

No. 1 Blog: Best Resources for Divorced Parents and Separated Families List

National 1st Place Winner: Victorious Woman Award!

Follow me on Facebook: facebook.com/ChildCenteredDivorce & facebook.com/RosalindSedacca

Follow me on Twitter: @RosalindSedacca

Follow me on LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/rosalindsedacca/

Join LinkedIn Group: Child-Centered Divorce

Join LinkedIn Group: Women Dating After 40

Parenting After Divorce: www.childcentereddivorce.com/parenting-divorce

You don't want to miss this episode that breaks down the 4 options for the divorce process and clears away the confusion. As a divorce and travel, expert Debbie shares her story (like many others) of divorce and opportunity. Her credentials are impressive but her energy is infectious. 

Debbie Martinez is the founder and president of Transformation thru Divorce where she provides divorce, post-divorce and co-parenting coaching. She is a certified mindful life coach, Florida Supreme Court Certified Family Mediator and Florida Supreme Court Qualified Arbitrator. Trained in collaborative divorce in Florida and South Carolina, Debbie currently serves on the board of the South Carolina Academy of Collaborative Professionals.

She has her MA from the University of South Florida in education and was a behavior specialist in the school system for five years before becoming a consultant in private practice. Media outlets of all sizes, including The New York Times, have recognized her expertise and professionalism. She gives workshops and lectures on various topics pertaining to divorce, self re-discovery, women’s issues and relationships. Debbie also writes a monthly divorce column for The Florida Villager Magazine and was a regular contributor to HuffPost.

Debbie brings her life experience and formal training into her coaching practice to empower and educate clients on their divorce journey and their new beginnings.  More information, archived articles and interviews from her morning television segment, “Debbie Does Divorce,” can be found on transformationthrudivorce.com

Links: 

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Join Stacie and Paulette as they walk down the path of divorce recovery after the pain and overwhelm of divorce. Divorce can be the catalyst for transformation and that was the case for both Stacie and Paulette. They met in Boston at an event for Mastin Kipp and again six months later in Bali where they went to join Mastin and his team of experts to write and five years later Stacie has not looked back.  You will benefit from her experience and wisdom in this fun and insightful conversation. 

Stacie McCoy has more than 25 years of experience directing and supporting early childhood education and non-profit family service programs in New England. For more than three years, she was fortunate to oversee her county’s Community Action Partnership Child and Family Services programs, including Head Start, Early Head Start, and Early Head Start Child Care Partnership programs, as well as CAPSC’s Healthy Families America and Comprehensive Family Support Services home visiting programs. She has supported adult education and parent journeys towards self-sufficiency, both as a program facilitator for the New Hampshire Employment Program’s Workplace Success Program and as a Learning and Development Specialist for Kaplan Higher Education. 

As New Hampshire team Lead in Washington DC, Stacie worked with the National Head Start Association and state lawmakers, advocating for Head Start families. She was later honored with an invitation from the National Center on Early Childhood Health and Wellness and the American Academy of Pediatrics to be a panelist at the “Understanding How the Opioid Crisis and Substance Use Disorders Impact Head Start Children, Families, and Staff: Creating a Path Forward” Workshop in Washington, D.C. Her passion for healing the victims of, and her community as a whole from, the impact of substance misuse lead her to her most recent position as executive director of a recovery meeting house that provides meetings and support groups for people in New Hampshire and southern Maine 365 days of the year.

Professional and personal experience drives Stacie’s belief that individuals and families are best able to heal, transform, and shine brightly when met with a compassionate, strength-based approach. Continuing on her mission to help others on that path, she is in the process of building a practice focusing on guiding couples, parents, and businesses through the complicated layers of friction and conflict toward healing, resolution, and wellness. 

Stacie lives in Rollinsford, New Hampshire, with her two amazing children and her guinea pig, Nan. She is an audiophile, an INFJ (Myers-Briggs says so), and is very much behind in editing the completed draft of her first book -- because she would much rather be on the sidelines and in the stands cheering wildly for her son and daughter. She can be reached at [email protected]  and found sharing very occasional, pithy blog posts at thedatingrookie.blogspot.com.

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

 Join Belinda and Paulette as they explore all possibilities and the spark of magic.

Belinda has been rescued by a turtle, learn to swim with dolphins, played with a momma whale and her baby and even swam with sharks. 

Belinda has overcome major life challenges—the suicide of her son, complete financial loss, and healing a degenerated spine without surgery. But all was not lost. By using ancient Hawaiian techniques and accepting responsibility for every aspect of her life, she was able to rise from the ashes, find her friggin’ joy, and now she’s sharing this invaluable information with others in her book,

Find Your Friggin’ Joy.

“This is a no-nonsense book for those who are willing to take an active part in their healing,” explains Farrell. “Chapter 2 is entitled ‘Sissies Turn Back’ because this book is going to challenge you at the core level to face what one must face in order to be free. 

I had to do some deep soul searching which might be considered scary. A sissy would run away from something scary. This book is not for sissies. 

I invite you to take a peek at these pages. I promise, as you do the inner work, and use the tools described within the chapters, you will not only discover what holds you back in life but also find that friggin’ joy that’s been locked away for so long.”

In Find Your Friggin’ Joy, Farrell takes readers on a journey using ancient Hawaiian teachings that invite the reader to forgive themselves and others, unplug from their old non-productive stories, and step into the frequencies of their Higher Self. Connecting with these frequencies can heal your physical body, bring you back into balance, lighten your load, and fulfill your soul’s purpose.

Bio: Belinda Farrell, author of the book Find Your Friggin’ Joy, graduated with a BA in Spanish and English from the University of California at Berkeley and is trained in hypnotherapy, past life regression, NLP, Hawaiian chanting, and ancient Hawaiian healing (Huna). Belinda trained with Anthony Robbins (author of Unlimited Power) and has effectively used these skills in her own life. She has completed 18 firewalks.  

When Belinda was forty-eight, she collapsed with herniated discs and spinal nerve damage. Threatened with paralysis by her medical doctors if she didn’t have surgery, Belinda instead chose to apply the ancient Hawaiian healing practices she had been learning the previous three years, which are covered in this book. Her back completely healed, including childhood scoliosis. For fifteen years she has been sharing these healing practices with others, offering Reconnective Healing and Huna classes and taking clients to Hawaii to teach Huna and swim with wild spinner dolphins.

You can find Belinda on her Website:  www.HunaHealing.com

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

You don't want to miss this candid conversation with Author Suzanna Quintana and Paulette as they discuss the devastating and confusing experience of being in a relationship with a Narcissistic Abuser. 

Suzanna's personal experience and insight will open your eyes to the "inappropriate behavior" of an abusive marriage and why so many stay in relationships of control and abuse on average of 7 years. 

What are the warning signs that are so easy to overlook? 

How does it feel to be in an emotional coma? 

How does silent treatment play a role in a relationship? 

What is gaslighting? 

What are the stages of Narcissistic abuse? 

Suzanna Quintana is a writer, abuse survivor, feminist, divine rebel, and single mom of three sons. After escaping nearly two decades of abuse at the hands of a diagnosed Narcissist, she now helps other women recover, heal, and leave the pain behind them for good. Suzanna is the bestselling author of the new book, “You’re Still That Girl: Get Over Your Abusive Ex for Good!” Find her on Facebook and Instagram and on her website at www.suzannaquintana.com

Find Suzanna Quintana on Social Media and email her at 

[email protected] 

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Join Paulette and Tammy Alvarez for this candid, light hearted yet powerful discussion about Women in Business!! 

Tammy Alvarez is the CEO and founder of Coral Consulting Group, a business performance and leadership development firm that helps people grow and become strong transformational leaders. 

Recognized globally as an award winning and patent holding transformation expert, Tammy has spent over twenty years as a senior executive leading complex global businesses for some of the worlds biggest companies in the technology and finance industries. 

She was often the youngest and only woman at the leadership table which gave her a unique perspective and enables her to bring a pragmatic approach to coaching and leadership development. 

Her passion for empowering women to lead authentically and reach their fullest potential inspired her to create Own Your Power!, a leadership development program serving women business leaders and entrepreneurs globally. 

“I’ve seen too many talented women fail to meet their fullest potential and become increasingly disenfranchised. It doesn’t have to be that way. When strong women are at the leadership table, companies are more successful and everyone wins. I founded this company to help more women accelerate their careers on their own terms.” 

~Tammy Alvarez Website links 

Coral Consulting Group: www.coralconsultinggroup.com

CCG Women in Leadership: https://www.coralconsultinggroup.com/women-in-leadership  

Social media links

Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ccg.ownyourpower/

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/coralconsulting/

YouTube https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCoN0nXwN_38dbi-DBcKmmxA?view_as=subscriber

Own Your Power! links

Free Webinar (Pre-registration link) https://www.tammyalvarez.com/pages/pre-register-webinar

Own Your Power! Program Link https://www.tammyalvarez.com/pages/own-your-power-masterclass

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Are you struggling with your finances? 

Do you feel like money is a Mafia Lord or a Comforting Advisor? 

Join Paulette and Adina Laver as they discuss money, curiosity and authenticity.

Adina Laver is a brilliant educator and coach. With her MBA, Master’s in Education, former Principal, a Certified Professional Coach and Neuroscience Junkie she has the skills and insight to get you unstuck. Paulette and Adina chat about the current flawed divorce landscape and how they both are determined to help others get through the process with was little damage as possible, emotionally, mentally, physically and yes…financially. 

Even though Adina was an experienced educator who taught internationally, a non-profit leader, a change manager and a leader to navigate change she was always contenting to grow and increase her skills and education. Her life all changed when she enrolled in a course in coaching and the instructor asked the question….List 3 things that make you HAPPY?? 

Well, this question sent her into a sweat!! Sad to say she confesses she had no idea that made me happy! I did hard work, obligation and commitment I didn’t do happy. She was terrified and couldn’t answer the question. Adina began to ask more thought provoking questions. How am I going to figure that out? If my life has not been centered around being happy what was it entered around? What has been the common theme surrounding all her decisions. 

What do I need to do to seek approval? What do I need to do to win approval? How do I gain the most approval? I can relate MAN OH MAN!! Courage to be Curious was born. Money Mindset was created. Free women from old stories with learning to ask bold questions. If I can’t work through my stuff how can I help others? Adina and Paulette both share how Divorce shouldn’t just be a legal matter. Give then them the tools to become more authentic in and with themselves. 

We start to ask our selves… Whats wrong with me? OR Blame the other person. Rejection is a real fear we all face. Judgement is real fear we all face. Question: What is the worst case scenario? Could you handle it and what would you do? Our subconscious can’t handle it so we avoid it. We learn to know what is a priority in living authentically. Dealing with old world ideologies and paradigms. Are you willing to accept the outcome? How do you cultivate the courage to ask those questions? We all have an Innate curiosity when we are younger and the diminishes as we age because we seek security and comfort. 

Habituation causes it to be harder to create change as we get older. Curiosity as a skill but it is teachable. Like going to the gym. Courage and curiosity More you do it the easier it gets and the more success you have. And we all have curiosity with money too. It gives us a certain kind of freedom and yet it is one of those things we struggle with the most due to our relationship with money. How do we treat money? 

We … Disrespect, Disengage, Surrender our power, Abuse, Hoard, Control, Fear, Paralysis...with money.

How do you suggest people start getting curious about their money mindset? 

Adina gives us a few techniques and exercises. If money were a person what would they be? A loving advisor confidant father Mafia lord What’s your person? You can’t change it if you don’t own it. 

Write down the last 5 interactions you had with money. Note emotions and thoughts in each of these. Shifts we need to make are subconscious! 

You will find Adina Laver on her Facebook and Instagram page Courage to be Curious, and on Linkedin Adina Laver. For her free PDF downloads and webinars you will find her on: www.couragetobecurious.com Or you can email her directly at: [email protected]

Paulette and "Cat" both natives from Boston met by chance at the National Association of Divorce Professionals annual conference in Fort Lauderdale Florida last March 2019. It was instant hugs before chats and a business card exchange. They had so much in common besides experiencing endless traffic on Route 128. 

Daughters who love and play ice hockey, difficult and expensive divorces, and authoring memoirs that pushed a few buttons. 

Catharine is a true expert in her field and a tiny dynamo who shoots from the hip with clarity and conviction. 

She is a: 

Certified Divorce Coach 

LICSW degree with Boston University 

Anxiety Coach 

University of New Hampshire Certificate in Life Coaching 

Assistant Director of National Association of Divorce Professionals Boston Chapter

Speaker and Author 

Single mom for a vibrant 13 year old daughter who loves hockey 

Cat shares her insight and expertise in mental health, coping with abuse and tips to get unstuck and move forward. 

Can you really get all your needs met in one location? 

Where all services are addressed in a streamlined approach. 

Where all professionals work together as a team. 

Knowing at the heart of the matter it is in helping the children of divorce that matters. 

Paulette and Cat discuss how they themselves had zero idea what they were doing and in surviving the hard way searched to learn to find a better solution to help others. 

We all know the statistics. 50 percent of marriages end in divorce. 

Cat believes that unless we slow down and journal and write our story we can’t heal.

This lack of healing also make us feel crazy. It makes us question everything. 

Or experiences just don't seem real. 

We walk around with sense of shame and regret. 

We are left to feel isolated and alone. 

Writing creates a sense of not feeling alone anymore and building a community as well as being able to serve others who are struggling.  

We discuss how vital it is to let go so we don't have to carry it around with us anymore. 

How does writing and sharing allow us to define ourselves and our story on our terms. 

Neither Cat nor Paulette believe that writers write to throw people under the bus.

They don't want anyone reading their books and come out feeling like a victim. 

The author and reader choose not to stay in the victim mode. 

We ask the question: How do you survive haters, judgement and blame? 

It's all about community and friends who supported you. You need community to heal and feel heard and understood. 

We all start to question: Was my perspective valid?  

This is my story. I am strong enough to tell it. Heal from it and move into a new better, healthier life. 

Of course we are going to disagree 

It’s my story.

It’s nobody else's. 

There are 20 different ways to tell a story. 

Anytime we tell out story it is triggering to someone else and our own vulnerabilities show up. 

Therapy is about healing the past.

Writing the book is healing. 

Coaching moving forward 

Being emotionally free is the answer. 

We can help you find your way. 

You can find Catharine Blake at: 

www.catblakecdc.com

This episode is dedicated to those who strive to research and know what they buy, why they buy it and what they put it on their skin. 

Julie Levin of Aspen Colorado shares her education, her commitment and her passion to organic plant-based skincare, Owner and curator of "Leaf People" Certified Organic Plant-Based skincare brand hand-made in Aspen Colorado. 

Julie Grew up in a very rural area of Alaska Worked in an organic bakery as a teen that sparks her curiosity in organics Dependent on the environment for food Wild Foraging for food and watching the populations of wildlife She then went to college and had an epiphany that she needed to travel Her trip around the world backpacking and hitchhiking around the world. First, stop in Australia with a Friend who studied naturopath medicine in a professional setting. Is it something I can actually do??

 This experience inspired me to seek out indigenous medicines, healers that ted her to South America, Andes and Europe. European studies were the beginning of naturopathic practices. This led her to land on a boat and found herself in Hong Kong studying Traditional Chines Medicine (TCM) She found herself meditating in the trees and blending both types of studies. 

Julie then continued her schooling formally where she studied back in the states and met her herbalist mentor of now 20 plus years. How does someone who traveled the world learning all about different cultures' viewpoints of medicine cope with adjusting to the western view? Difficulty in adjusting to CVS mentality. Julie discusses her ability to agree to disagree mentality when she ran into the abrasive edge of judgment. Even Julie’s traditional MD friend working in Women’s Health and General Medicine is prescribing turmeric for anti-inflammatory!! We discuss the difference between the training in cosmetic chemistry lab-based versus botanically-based training. Julie shares a story about a skin oil that evaporates as soon as it hits your skin and how toxic that is.

 Organic plant-based products are primarily concerned about the environment and our awareness of doing as little harm as possible to humans and the earth. Julie educates us about the phenomenon of Greenwashing. How can we combat greenwashing? Companies will pretend to be organic. Know the person behind your company. More care in a small company Finding companies that have the priority to be transparent Julie Levin is all that.

 You can find Julie Levin by emailing her: [email protected] www.leafpeople.com And of course Facebook, Instagram at Leafpeople

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com