Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Let's Welcome Joan Barry to The Podcast!

We talk about the devastation of Human Trafficking and its the effect on exploitation of women has society as a whole.

2.5 million people per year 

:(

ACCORDING TO INTERNATIONAL DEFINITION, HUMAN TRAFFICKING MEANS: “THE RECRUITMENT, TRANSPORTATION, TRANSFER, HARBOURING OR PURCHASE OF PERSONS FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF EXPLOITATION.”

Typically, human beings are being disposed of, as if they were goods or objects which can be bought or sold irrationally. Trafficking exploits human beings for income, whether through sex, forced labor, or human organs.

Traffickers take advantage of poverty, lack of prospects, and hope for a better future, by tricking and luring their victims into other countries.

Whether they emigrate legally or illegally, they then go with false promises of work or prospective marriages. 

Upon their arrival, the victims are coerced into dependence through debt bondage, violence or drugs, therefore becoming “exploited” goods. 

They are deprived of their personal rights, freedom of speech, independence and self-respect.

People who are looking for:

• Love 

• Acceptance 

• A better future 

• Security 

• Money and opportunity 

Those who are most vulnerable 

• Poverty 

• Deceitful advertisements

• Agreements with trusted family members or friends 

• False lovers (loverboys) ….take time to interview them/grooming 

• Kidnapping ..force is involved

150 Billion Industry

To get involved, please Contact Joan at: 

888-373-7888

[email protected] 

Rebuilding the self before we venture into any new relationship 

Loss of the familiar 

Loss of the comfortable 

Getting in touch with the self 

Slowing down

Sitting in silence 

Step ONE- accepting the grief as being an essential part of the process 

allowing ourselves to "feel" the feelings of grief in order to assimilate and process them 

Consider a few simple tasks at hand 

AND recall 

It doesn’t happen overnight

One drawer at a time

One shelf at a time 

One minute at a time 

Reclaiming who we are 

Building relationships with people who lift us up 

AND 

Love us unconditionally 

Find the beauty in life 

Compliment others 

Read… self-help books/“shelf help” books 

Journal

Connecting to God or Universal Power

Join a support group 

Find other women going through a similar transition 

Practice Extreme Self Care 

Important here to remind ourselves and everyone that LIFE change in all areas is difficult 

When we are faced with a change of any kind is a loss 

Illness 

Job loss 

Death

Move

Pregnancy loss 

Divorce 

All require a shift in thinking and action.

After we get done with the finger-pointing and blame…

Its all their fault…it’s all my fault 

Mercury is retrograde 

Making excuses 

If I only took better care of myself 

I should have known better 

What the hell was I thinking 

Go through an array of emotions 

Need to create a self-care plan 

Have to do the work

Transformation and change is only possible if you can let go…do the work…heal, rebirth and rebuild.

The only way to get through the pain is to feel it first. 

One has to embrace it and walk through the fire

Examine what, if anything is currently working and serving us 

And not until that time and healing has occurred 

When to consider making changes

When you are safe

When you are strong

When you are healing 

When you are free to do so 

When the "old you" is ready for a "new you"

When you can handle the game and possible rejection 

When you are ready to play again 

What needs to change?

First, ask yourself and write down your answers 

If the hint of an answer is YES…

Next, ask yourself 3 questions and write down your answers 

Finding ourself and healing after the loss of any kind is not a quick fix but a beautiful journey into a new unimaginable life 

It’s a long careful detailed approach to deciding our next best step…

My journey into healing started by cleaning up my diet…

Paulette jokes that she lived on Snickers bars and Diet Coke…but It’s true..

Her idea of a healthy meal was a greek salad from a pizza joint 

I had to clean up my diet 

I had to clean up my buying habits

I had to clean up my relationships 

I had to clean up my wor

Sit back and enjoy this candid and uplifting interview with one of the most inspiring and knowledgable women promoting eco-friendly, sustainable and gorgeous jewelry, soaps, candles and handcrafted artistry. She shares with us how Island Organics and KiCo Jewelry was created.   

We discuss the environment, female entrepreneurship and her vision for the future. 

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

 The Divorce Deluge: Is anyone happily married anymore?

Let’s love our gentleman. We don’t want to neglect them. 

There are good ones and highly evolved ones. 

When we learn to keep our heart open and continue to try in our personal love, we reap amazing benefits. 

Check out our new episode where we dive deep into these topics! You can find me and @healthygirlholisticlifestyle on the podcast every Wednesday at 8am CST! The link is in my bio! 

www.anchor.fm/thriving-in-chaos

I mean come on...

What are the current statistics of Divorce?

50% for the first marriage...

67% for the second, 

and 73% third...

YIKES! They aren’t good!!

We must discern that our partner is a good mate and then work to make it a success. 

We have a pretty hard-wired belief system engrained in us as children….

At 23, I felt intense pressure to get married and fit in. 

I felt like I had to do what was expected of me...

-Dressed up as a bride

-Dreamt about the wedding  

-My Goal was to find a husband, first and foremost

NOT….

The right person, the right time, the right connection.

THEN the midlife crisis really is a crying out for wanting to feel alive again. 

You can’t fight for something that doesn’t exist.

If something is harming our spirit, we must let it go.

Why are Millennials not marrying?

FEAR.

Their spiritual standpoint.

Don’t need a piece of paper.

Freedom.

They are there because they choose to be there not because they have to. 

They have seen their parents struggle: lie, cheat, and disrespect each other. 

The staying together for the children epidemic (ages 30-50)

Because it is only a piece of paper.

Getting a divorce was the best decision I ever made …

Marrying the wrong person doesn’t make them a bad person.

We all deserve to be happy.

We are taught we are sinners if we leave so we stay.

What does a happy marriage look like? 

Marriage is not an obligation but a genuine connection. 

Your partner makes you the best version of you you can be. 

They bring out the best in you and you do the same for them. 

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Fear of change is our obstacle

What is Uncomfortable?

Need to feel comfortable at all times

It’s all we know 

Creatures of habit 

Moments where I need to create chaos 

As we contemplate? 

Am I worthy of this? 

Am in ready for this? 

Like an “addiction” 

What does that do to our behaviour and our habits? 

NEED to create conflict 

It dictates our behaviour and habits 

New statistic 

Kids are outside less time then people in prison 

70 minutes a day ..it’s the LAW 

Why are we afraid of change?

Abhinevesa (fear of death that prevents us from living fully)

Why do you want to fit in so badly? 

Others opinions are paramount 

Bombardment of Advertisements

Sneakers/TOYS 

Connection 

Inclusion  

Community of similar people 

Validation from masses 

Consumerism 

Conformity 

If you think differently watch out

Free thinking women were branded witches 

Who creates the popular paradigm 

Business

Politics

Keeping up with the Jones!!

What will the neighbors think?

Worry about ruining the image of perfection

Didn’t want to bust the bubble 

Failure 

Shame 

Blame 

Embarrassment 

Fake it til you make it ….pretending all is well 

Become real and raw and passionate about living an authentic life 

Create a connection and community 

Build awareness 

Allow for insight and different POV 

Create momentum 

Shift shaker 

Creating a different paradigm 

Start to watch your thoughts 

Ask yourself what fits 

What do you need to change? 

I wanted so badly to fit in and conform as a kids

Fur coat to school

Sequins in the toilet 

Lipstick stain from dance recitals 

We did that!

Spirituality 

Earth 

Organic

Plant based 

Serve 

Empower 

Inspire 

Support

Introduction to the podcast. 

 Sharing our Bio's and why and how we came together to shape, support and empower women to live their best lives despite the constant chaos that is thrown our way.  

Topics covered.  

Full calendars 

Never saying no 

Taking on more and more 

Constant feed of advertising  

Social media image  

Always having to be perfect  

Holidays are most chaotic time of the year 

State of Frenzy 

Driving like maniacs  

Stores filled with impatience 

Not participating in this anymore  

Decision to step out of it all  

No tree 

No sending cards 

No decorations  

Limiting gifts 

So many living in debt  

Credit card debt is out of control  

You become a participant in the game of chaos  

No-one is happy  

Constant  yearning for the next high  

Jump on your computer  

Buy whatever we want at the click of a button  

Buying things we don’t need to impress people we don’t know or like  

Minimalists movement /Josh Becker  Leo Barbuta  

Do we seek the chaos in our lives?  Chaos is everywhere  What it is?  Are we a society built on chaos?  

It’s there and unavoidable. We are not getting rid of it.

Full calendars are the norm. 

 How do we seek chaos in our lives?  

Excitement verses chaos.   What is the difference?   Holidays, School, Sports as examples ...built into our children's lives.

What is chaos?  

Resistance,  attachment,  identification.

Have we become a society built on chaos?  (Stimulus, drama, gossip, celebrity obsession) 

How do we lessen the chaos?  (Stepping back to get quiet, set boundaries, ask yourself a few simple questions.) 

What do I really need?  

What do I truly want?  

What is my deepest driving desire?  

What is my greatest fear in this exact moment in time? 

Never ending cycle...  Humans doings verses human beings.

Disjointed from who we truly are.

Attachment and Identification.

Clinging/Functioning based on these feelings we have embraced.

Magnetic pull of clinging. 

Addressed topics of priorities.

We need to put everyone in our lives first.

Feeling guility for taking care of ourselves. 

Martyrs. 

Getting quiet is terrifying.

No noise so we create it.

I am starting to feel off...  How about some???…. Stimulus.

Obsession with celebrity drama.

NO is a complete sentence.  Polite way to say no.

What do I need?

What do I want?

Sit and get quiet.   Meditation.  Inhale and exhale slowly, smoothly and deeply for a minimum of 5 minutes per day.

Journal...  What do I need? What do I need to cut away from and let go of?  

A few years ago that I couldn’t have asked myself those questions.  I couldn’t have been able to answer them. 

Setting the stage of understanding the chaos in our lives and how we can learn to manage it. 

Paulette Rigo CDC, CDS

Consultant/Coach

Author

Speaker

Podcast Host

1:1 Retreats

Find out more about Paulette at

www.betterdivorceacademy.com

www.bettercareerproject.com

www.betterdivorceblueprint.com

www.betterdivorcesummit.com

Latest episode of Thriving In Chaos: with Paulette and Elizabeth Ann Stanley show notes.

We share what is our fly in your chardonnay.

BOOK patience: such a long process 

building a launch team

Surrender has a connotation of allowing the universe to hold you and nurture you and take care of everything

but in reality 

letting go is releasing our attachment to the outcome

letting the process of healing begin when we stop forcing and stop trying to control every blink of our eye, every conversation, every act

Mentor Cheryl Richardson

Grace Cards AMAZING 

when we release our attachment to the outcome we allow the power of grace to work its magic!

We want to control everything 

and stay comfortable

eternal optimist 

it can change 

busy doesn’t allow us to get to know someone completely 

How do we release the constant desire to stay busy? 

We have to take the "bull" by the horns 

We spoke last time 

of our constant need to stay busy to DO something 

we are human beings not human doings….

The opposite of addiction isn’t sobriety …it’s connection. 

False sense of connection. 

a lack of connection to self, to others and to community

and a feeling of being controlled by others and situations 

“busy” Is the new popular 

allowing situations to unfold slowly, naturally and dare I say organically 

slowing down and simplification is key…

finding ease 

finding what’s really essential

The concept of minimalism.

Cottage bed sink one pair shoes but that’s not it…

Toxic people minimalizing stuff, and distractions  

weeding out the things in m life 

The concept of essentialism verses minimalism. 

Core values 

Important to you 

what adds value and allows you to share your gifts with the world 

contribution is KEY 

Getting quiet. 

Tuning into self. 

Awarefulness (I know I know it’s not a word) 

Elizabeth and Paulette share their particular moment in time that woke them UP??

purge and prune 

dump and dwindle 

Write down all that you want to accomplish in 6-18 months

3 categories 

Loose things off your list 

Keep peeling away

ask yourself 3 things 

Habits 

Skills 

Characteristics

Traits 

Growth 

carrying the weight of the world 

blame and shame 

scar and burden 

stigma 

like a tattoo 

exfoliate the soul 

15 years is a long time to carry anything. 

we are not perfect 

we are speaking from experience 

walked out of the fire 

anyway spending with us 

real women with a purpose 

awake with the possibility 

shine the light 

the idea in their head 

deeply grateful for this opportunity

It’s never too late to be the best possible version of ourselves. 

Less is More 

See you next

Introduction to your hosts, Paulette & Elizabeth.

Our purpose and why we created this podcast.

Do we seek chaos?

What is chaos?

Have we become a society addicted to chaos?

Are we avoiding self-awareness by being busy?

Make sure to subscribe to our podcast to learn all the ways we Thrive in Chaos. 

To contact Elizabeth and Paulette: 

[email protected]