Better Off Bald

When Dr. Hale placed Adrienne in my arms for the first time, I didn’t care that she had a big forehead, squishy eyes, and flushed skin covered in dried, yellow crusty stuff. I felt this rush of love jettison through my entire being, so powerful I thought it could knock people down. I would do anything for this kid.

Andrea looking at Adrienne, who is about two-hours-old © April 8, 1986

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

There are dry goods, which have a long shelf life, but there are also rotting bananas, old apples, day-old muffins, and a cake that expired a week ago. Even as I thank them, I vow not to return. Cancer has consumed Adrienne’s liver, her lungs, and now our lives, but I refuse to let it take our self-respect.

Adrienne & Andrea in mall photo booth © 1988

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

“Cancer gave me cheekbones and an excuse to wear a strawberry wig. I get to spend time with my family, which was really rare before this. I’m getting a new bed when I get home. All things positive and light have resulted from the tiny bulbs that have decided to live on my liver and lungs.”

PAWS visit with Baci © May 21, 2001

PAWS visit with Vera © May 28, 2001

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

“Here’s the deal: I’m your parent first, then your sister, and when you get older, I hope to be your friend. Got it? One more thing, don’t ever threaten me again.”

Adrienne’s painting “Best Parent, Sister, And Friend”

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

Adrienne looks at the four of us with a determined gleam. “I’d rather be dead than deaf.”
I want to strangle her. She would rather be dead than deaf?

Consent for Chemotherapy with Adrienne’s signature © May 22, 2001

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

So instead of praying for the cancer to go away, I pray for something more realistic. Please god, if you are out there, please let it be ovarian cancer. Adrienne can live without her ovaries, but not her liver. Women survive ovarian cancer.

Adrienne’s Survival Kit © May 2001

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

I have never heard of liver cancer before. Cirrhosis, yes, too much alcohol causes liver damage. What did he say? H something. Cellular is the second word. Need the fog sucked out of my head. Can’t think.

Adrienne at Marilyn’s wedding © February 2000

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

In my head, I stop speaking. This is the first time I’ve said the ‘C’ word aloud and I say it to this angry, horrible woman whose child, I’m sure, is perfectly healthy.

Andrea & Adrienne: 14 years & 4 months old respectively © August 1986

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

Working in an ER is supposed to consist of broken bones, chest pains, deep cuts, maybe an occasional gunshot wound. I believe he has never given this kind of news before.

Dr. Lin glances at Adrienne, but then turns to me.

“She has tumors in her liver and lungs.”

Adrienne celebrating her 15th birthday by attending the Rocky Horror Picture Show © April 2001 (one month before diagnosis)

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. While I narrate the story in present tense, I use flashbacks to explain how I gained custody of Adrienne from our mother, how our relationship evolved over time, and how we displayed our unconditional love for each other. Adrienne’s courageous spirit is revealed as she squeezes more life in 147 days than most people do in a lifetime. From meeting Jay Leno to spending the day with Dave Navarro of Jane’s Addiction, Adrienne makes every moment count. As she lay dying, my younger sister Adrienne taught me how to live.

Birmingham, Alabama

Better Off Bald chronicles my sister Adrienne’s 147-day battle with liver cancer; the book also shows how I reared Adrienne from the time she was eight until she died at the age of fifteen. For more information about primary liver cancer, go to Blue Faery: The Adrienne Wilson Liver Cancer Association.