Between Parents

In this episode Billy & Joy discuss the fact from the blog post, The Tail End, that points out that by the time you graduate from high school you will have used 93% of the face-to-face time you have with your parents.

Feel free to re-read that sentence. Doesn't that stop you in your tracks?

What are the implications to this fact? Get the conversation started with this episode.

Talk about this:

How intentional are your priorities? What needs to change?

In what moments, environments, and practices does conversation & connection flourish? When and where is it a challenge?

Imagine that moment your kids pack up and head to college. What does that moment look and feel like if it is regret-free?

Related(ish) Links:

Shoe-tossing as per Wikipedia

Tim Urban blog post The Tail End

Tim Ferriss interview quote.

Calendar Countdown apps here.

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Have you left a review on Apple Podcasts (formerly know as iTunes)? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with Apple Podcasts, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

By the time we reach adulthood everyone has fully developed Operating Systems. These systems are the way we engage with the world in a kind of reflexive manner. They are a well-crafted blend of nature AND nurture and are perfect for achieving the results we are currently experiencing. But because these systems operate in the background, we don't always recognize what's working and what's not. In this episode Billy and Joy tee up a few ideas for identifying our systems and for getting insights into our blind spots.

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Have you left a review on Apple Podcasts (formerly know as iTunes)? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with Apple Podcasts, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

We all have habits. We all do little things daily that add up to something bigger than we expect. In this episode Billy and Joy talk about Charles Duhigg's concepts around Keystone Habits and how little efforts can make a big difference in our relationships and with our families. Take a listen and find small victories you can have with little changes!

Talk about this:

What ills do you see in your marriage / family that might improve in the presence of a good keystone habit?

What Keystone habits do you ALREADY do?

What others might you try adding on?

Remember – just introduce one new habit at a time!!

Related Links:

If you love this topic, we highly recommend Charles Duhigg's book, The Power of Habit.

Listen to Duhigg's TED Talk here.

The Jerry Seinfeld "Don't Break The Chain" calendar explained here.

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Have you left a review on iTunes? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

Unfortunately children don't come with an owner's manual and parents aren't given a detailed job description. Is it any wonder raising kids can be confusing? In this episode Billy and Joy talk about three parts of a parent's job which clarify what it is we are really doing with our kids!

Talk about this:

Talk to your spouse and/or circle of people you do life with and compare note about the most challenging parts of your parenting "job description. Do you struggle most being the Conscience, Consequences, or Self-Discipline?

ALSO - spend some time talking about your "segue plans." Are you intentionally handing things off to your kids? Why or why not?

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Also have you left a review on iTunes? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

Have you ever heard of a nameless team…or of a team without logos, colors, and songs? These are common tools used to identify groups, to rally individuals and to galvanize fans. When you see people sporting a particular mascot on the back of their car, you learn something about them. In this episode, Billy and Joy talk about the importance AND the process of creating a family identity.

Talk about this:

What's stopping you from creating a family identity?

What is your process to hone in on your values? When and where will you do it?

How will you display and celebrate your values?

Related link:

Here's an example of the truth wall mentioned in the episode. (Click here)

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Also have you left a review on iTunes? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Was Jerry McGuire right? Does marriage really "complete" us? We have all heard ideas about marriage that bear little resemblance to the realities of our relationships. In today's episode Billy and Joy kick four myths to the curb and offer some more practical insights on what having a spouse really means.

Talk about this:

Which myth did or do we currently believe? In what way do we need to ground our marriage in a more healthy reality?

Related link:

The Tim Keller series Billy mentions in the episode was eventually turned into a book that we love called The Meaning of Marriage. Click here.

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Also have you left a review on iTunes? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

What do you do when you catch your kid lying to you? This is one of the biggest, most common dilemma parents face. In this episode Billy & Joy talk about why this topic is so emotional and review four approaches to confronting the lies.

The quick four:

1. Set right expectations
2. Execute productive reactions
3. Foster communication
4. Be intentional with consequences

Talk about this:

From what I've experienced / known of MY kids, what is his/her propensity or reasoning for most lies?

What might be the problem behind the lie?

What do I need to change in the way I approach lying?

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Have you left a review on iTunes? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

Are you thinking about having kids? Ever wonder what you need to know or maybe what things you shouldn't worry about? Where do you start? In this episode Billy & Joy talk about six crucial practice you should develop before you have kids. While this list isn't exhaustive, it's a great starting point.

Here's a quick recap of the list:

#1 – Establish healthy habits

#2 – Dial into families whose family (and processes) you admire

#3 – Prioritize your marriage

#4 – Prepare for your new life with some practical questions

#5 – Imagine the failings, disappointments, and flaws with a family

#6 – Practice Serving

Talk about this:

Where do we need to spend time thinking about our pre-kid planning?

Related Link

In case you want to see the list of misspelt words! http://www.telegraph.co.uk/education/educationnews/5538890/Definitely-is-most-commonly-misspelt-word.html

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Also have you left a review on iTunes? TODAY IS YOUR DAY!!!!

Leaving a review is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

Somewhere between the sleepless nights and high school graduation, parents often lose the "fun" part of their family. As understandable as this loss is, who really wants to settle for drudgery? In this episode Billy and Joy talk about what kills the fun and then talks about approaches to maximizing the enjoyment with your team.

Take a listen and if you need a quick reminder of their list, here you go:

1. Defend against the return of the bad habits (or to put in a positive way, get your rest, maintain margin, avoid comparisons, stop complaining, & manage expectations)
2. Articulate "Fun" as a goal
3. Lean into your kids for ideas -- kids come naturally to play -- PLAY WITH THEM (If you need specific ideas, download episode #10)
4. Make a plan
5. Celebrate often
6. Lighten up the pressure.

Talk about this:

Do we have all the joy we desire in our family? What needs to change?

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Also have you left a review on iTunes? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!

Parenting is the perfect environment for fear to grow and flourish…but it doesn't have to. In today's episode Joy and Billy kick around a few ideas for getting out of the worry/fear cycle. (And yes, worry is a synonym for fear!) Here's the four key habits for those of you who like notes!

1. Name you fears – bringing your fears into the light helps defuse their power.
2. Get to the root of your fear – knowing what you're really afraid of helps you understand and deal with the true issue.
3. Share your fears – there's power in community.
4. Take a long view- perspective helps!

Talk about this: What are you afraid of…really?

Also remember… We are on Facebook! If you like the page you'll receive more consistent updates and be able to share episodes with others. Connect with us @BetweenParentsPodcast

Also have you left a review on iTunes? This is SUPER helpful in helping others find our show. Along with iTunes, Overcast, and Stitcher, Between Parents is now on TuneIn (the fun way to listen if you are using Amazon's Alexa). You can chat back with us on Twitter @between_parents or on Instagram @betweenparents

Thanks for listening and sharing this podcast with your friends!