Apache Tear was one of the very first stones I ever chose as a child, long before I knew anything about crystal meanings, shadow work, or the symbolism this little piece of volcanic glass would eventually carry for me.

I found it while visiting a witchy shop in Omaha, Nebraska with my dad during a complicated period of my childhood. My parents were divorced, I was moving back and forth between two homes, and as an only child I often found myself caught in the middle of adult emotions and situations I didn’t yet have the language to understand.

Decades later, I still have that same tiny Apache Tear.

In this episode of The Crystal Library, I explore the geology of Apache Tear, its relationship to obsidian, and the striking way this almost-black stone can become translucent when held to the light. That physical characteristic becomes a powerful metaphor for shadow work: not eliminating the darkness, but becoming willing to see what is actually there.

We also explore Apache Tear’s modern associations with grief, mourning, protection, forgiveness, emotional release, and resilience, along with a message from Colette Baron-Reid’s Crystal Spirits Oracle about allowing grief to move rather than suppressing it.

I also take a careful look at the commonly repeated story behind the name “Apache Tear.” Rather than presenting modern crystal lore as authenticated Indigenous history, I talk about why it matters to distinguish documented history, widely repeated metaphysical stories, and our own spiritual interpretations.

This episode becomes deeply personal as I reflect on childhood grief, emotional inheritance, forgiveness, and the work it has taken to hold two truths at once: that some experiences affected me deeply, and that my parents were also human beings navigating their own wounds with the tools they had available to them.

We talk about:

•  Apache Tear geology and its connection to obsidian 
•  Why some Apache Tears appear translucent when held to light 
•  The history and modern lore surrounding the stone’s name 
•  Grief that exists beyond death and obvious loss 
•  Childhood grief and the loss of stability 
•  Shadow work as self-awareness rather than self-rejection 
•  Protection as staying grounded and present with difficult emotions 
•  Forgiveness without rewriting what happened 
•  Simple ways to work with Apache Tear for journaling, meditation, and emotional reflection 
•  Why the stone I chose as a child carries an entirely different meaning for me now 

Sometimes a crystal enters our life before we have any idea what it will eventually mean to us.

And sometimes, years later, we realize we have changed enough to finally see the story it has been holding with us. 

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

Mabon marks the Autumn Equinox, a threshold between light and darkness, abundance and release, growth and the quieter season ahead. For me, it also marks the final episode in my Wheel of the Year series.

In this episode of Big Crystal Energy, I’m exploring the history and meaning of Mabon, including why the name itself is much more modern than many people realize. I talk about Mabon as the second harvest, the symbolism of the Autumn Equinox, and what this season can teach us about gratitude, discernment, balance, and recognizing what has already grown in our lives.

I also dive into some of my favorite Mabon correspondences, including crystals, herbs, colors, scents, foods, deities, and older harvest folklore. I explore traditions surrounding apples, grapes, bread, harvest celebrations, and the final sheaf of grain, along with the deeper connection between abundance, impermanence, and the approaching darker half of the year. 

I share a beautiful Mabon ritual written by Raechel Henderson from the 2024 Llewellyn’s Sabbats Almanac, centered around gratitude, recognizing your personal harvest, working with Hestia, and turning your blessings into meaningful action.

And because I am always going to bring divination into the conversation, I also share some of my favorite seasonal decks, including the Seasons of the Witch: Mabon Oracle, the Seasons of the Witch: Autumn Tarot, and the Mabon journal, along with several simple three-card spreads you can use during the season.

More than anything, this episode asks one question:

What is your harvest?

Not what are you still chasing or what do you still need to accomplish, but what is already here because of the work, energy, love, and intention you have poured into your life?

In this episode:

•  The history of Mabon and the Autumn Equinox 
•  Why Mabon is considered the second harvest 
•  Gratitude, balance, discernment, and seasonal transition 
•  Mabon crystals, herbs, foods, colors, scents, and deities 
•  Autumn folklore and older harvest customs 
•  Apples, grain, bread, grapes, and harvest symbolism 
•  A simple Mabon ritual inspired by Llewellyn’s Sabbats Almanac
•  Working with Hestia and hearth energy 
• Seasons of the Witch: Mabon Oracle
• Seasons of the Witch: Autumn Tarot
•  Three simple Mabon tarot and oracle spreads 
•  Closing the Wheel of the Year and preparing for Samhain 

And don’t worry, Samhain is still coming. I consider that one of those essential Big Crystal Energy episodes that deserves its own space every season.

Until next time, friends, keep bringing your own Big Crystal Energy into the world.

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

This week inside The Crystal Library, we’re going deep into magnetite and lodestone, a stone whose actual physical properties are every bit as fascinating as its magical associations.

Magnetite is one of the most naturally magnetic minerals on Earth, and naturally magnetized pieces are known as lodestones. Long before humans understood magnetic fields, people were already fascinated by this strange dark stone that could pull iron toward itself without ever touching it.

In this episode, Ashleigh explores the science behind magnetite, how lodestone became connected to some of the earliest compass technology, and why this stone has been associated for centuries with attraction, direction, luck, love, money, and personal magnetism.

We also get into traditional lodestone practices within hoodoo, rootwork, and conjure, including the practice of “feeding” lodestones with magnetic material, and why attraction magic becomes much more interesting when we remember that magnetism also involves polarity and repulsion.

But this episode is really about something bigger.

What are you already attracting into your life?

What no longer belongs in your field?

And are the choices you are making actually moving you toward the life you say you want?

Ashleigh also pairs magnetite with The Star and The Chariot, two tarot cards that beautifully reflect the deeper message of this stone. The Star gives us direction. The Chariot gives us movement. Magnetite asks whether the two are actually aligned.

You’ll also get a simple magnetite ritual built around three questions:

What am I calling toward me?
What am I ready to release or repel?
What direction am I actually choosing?

This one is part geology lesson, part magical history, part manifestation reality check, and definitely a little bit of a crystal sermon.

Because magnetite may be known as a stone of attraction, but maybe its real lesson is learning what deserves to come closer, what needs to fall away, and how to recognize your own true north.

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

What if becoming a witch isn’t about becoming someone new—but finally giving yourself permission to become who you’ve always been?

This week on Big Crystal Energy, I’m joined by Adrienna Elcome, aka the Violet Wiitch—a tarot reader, witchcraft teacher, photographer, shadow worker, and creator of Witch School.

Adrienna and I originally crossed paths through Angelica Cresci’s Glamour Magic course, and in this conversation we get into what it actually looks like to live your witchcraft—not just learn about it.

We talk about Adrienna’s experience growing up as a magical child within Catholicism, the losses that ultimately pushed her to question what she believed, and the experiences with meditation and her intuition that helped lead her toward the path she walks today.

We also get into the witch wound and what happens when you begin publicly claiming the parts of yourself you may have once kept hidden. We talk about coming out of the broom closet, learning to trust your intuition, shadow work, tarot, and the sometimes uncomfortable process of allowing yourself to be fully seen.

Adrienna also shares how she became the “town witch” she dreamed of being as a child, the realities of creating magical community, and why she kept showing up even when her first event didn’t go according to plan. We talk about her creation of Witch School and why she believes witchcraft is something you have to actually practice—you can consume all the books, podcasts, and information you want, but at some point, you have to get your hands dirty.

And of course, because Adrienna and I share a deep love for Florence + the Machine, we end the conversation talking about Florence Welch, handmade witchy cloaks, crying at concerts, magical road trips, and the healing power of live music.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Growing up magical within Catholicism
• Grief as a catalyst for spiritual awakening
• Tarot, channeling, and learning to trust your intuition
• Coming out of the broom closet and the witch wound
• Shadow work and finding wisdom in uncomfortable places
• Becoming your community’s “town witch”
• Creating magical community and having the courage to start
• Why practicing witchcraft matters more than simply consuming information about it
• Letting your magical practice ebb and flow with the seasons of your life
• Finding magic in simple, everyday practices
• Adrienna’s Witch School and teaching witchcraft from the roots
• Florence + the Machine and the magic of live music
• Bringing more play, ritual, and magic into everyday life and relationships

You can find Adrienna on Instagram and Threads as The Violet Wiitch. She also offers virtual tarot readings, shares witchcraft teachings and lunar taroscopes through her Substack, and has a Patreon filled with past workshops and learning resources.

✨ If you enjoy this conversation, share it with a magical friend, and don’t forget to follow Big Crystal Energy wherever you listen.

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

What happens when a stone seems to exist between two worlds?

In this episode of The Crystal Library, we’re exploring Mystical Merlinite, also known as Indigo Gabbro—a dark, mottled igneous rock surrounded by modern metaphysical associations with intuition, divination, shadow work, past lives, spirit communication, and the unseen.

We begin with the geology of Indigo Gabbro and the surprisingly beautiful story of a rock that forms slowly beneath the Earth’s surface, crystallizing in darkness over time. From there, we untangle the confusing difference between Merlinite, Mystical Merlinite, and Indigo Gabbro before heading into the mythology behind its magical name.

We’ll explore Merlin not necessarily as a literal historical wizard connected to this stone, but as an archetype of the person who stands between worlds—between ordinary knowledge and hidden knowledge, civilization and wilderness, the rational and the magical.

But the deeper theme of this episode is integration.

Rather than simply treating Mystical Merlinite as a “psychic stone,” we look at its symbolism as an invitation to hold seemingly opposing truths at the same time: intuition and reason, spirituality and skepticism, light and shadow, who we were and who we are becoming.

We’ll also talk about shadow work, liminal spaces, intuition versus discernment, the metaphysical association with past lives and the Akashic Records, and why The High Priestess is such a perfect tarot pairing for this stone.

And at the end, I’ll walk you through a simple Mystical Merlinite practice designed to help you sit with the areas of your life that don’t have an easy answer yet.

Because maybe not everything needs to be immediately brought into the light.

Sometimes things need enough time in the dark to crystallize.

In this episode:

•  What Mystical Merlinite and Indigo Gabbro actually are 
•  The confusing history of the name “Merlinite” 
•  The Merlin archetype and why it fits this stone 
•  Mystical Merlinite’s metaphysical associations 
•  Shadow work and integrating the parts of ourselves we tend to reject 
•  Why thresholds and liminal spaces can be transformative 
•  Intuition, logic, and spiritual discernment 
•  Past-life symbolism and previous versions of ourselves 
•  Mystical Merlinite + The High Priestess 
•  A simple ritual for learning to hold two truths at once 

Follow Big Crystal Energy on Instagram and Threads: @bigcrystalenergy.ash

If this episode resonates with you, share it with someone who might be standing in an in-between season of their own.

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

September always feels like a threshold for me.

It’s the beginning of my favorite part of the year, the point where I start feeling more like myself again, and where style, scent, crystals, and ritual all begin to take on a little more meaning.

In this solo episode, I’m exploring the idea of liminality and how certain seasons or transitions can help us reconnect with parts of ourselves that may feel quieter at other times of the year. For me, autumn is that season.

I’m also talking about glamour magic in a way that has been on my mind lately: not as a mask, illusion, or way of becoming someone else, but as a way of amplifying and expressing who you already are.

Inspired in part by a recent conversation I heard with Mitch Horowitz on The Occult Rejects, this episode explores personal style as a form of authentic self-expression and how clothing, scent, jewelry, crystals, and even the atmosphere we create around ourselves can become part of our magical practice.

We talk about why scent is such a powerful memory trigger, why this time of year makes me want to smell smoky, woodsy, masculine, and—quite frankly—haunted, and some of the crystals I naturally reach for as the darker part of the year approaches, including labradorite, black obsidian, clear quartz, garnet, and amethyst.

I also share how I work with these stones through jewelry, ritual, scrying, and seasonal practice, plus a simple “Dressing for the Threshold” glamour ritual you can use to intentionally embody the parts of yourself that are asking to become more visible.

And because this is Big Crystal Energy, we tie it all together with The Magician and the reminder that the tools are never the source of the magic.

You are.

In this episode:

•  What liminality means and why certain seasons can feel like personal thresholds 
•  Why September feels like a return to myself 
•  Personal style as self-expression rather than disguise 
•  Glamour magic as amplification instead of illusion 
•  Using clothing, jewelry, makeup, and scent intentionally 
•  Why scent can act like a portal to memory 
•  My current “I want to smell haunted” fragrance era 
•  Labradorite, obsidian, clear quartz, garnet, and amethyst for the darker season 
•  Using crystal jewelry and scrying tools as part of glamour and ritual 
•  How to identify your own personal liminal season 
•  A simple Dressing for the Threshold ritual 
•  The Magician as a reminder that the power lives in you 

Reflection question:
What part of yourself are you ready to make more visible?

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

What happens when your logic, intuition, words, and actions finally begin moving in the same direction?

In this episode of The Crystal Library, we explore sodalite—a deep blue stone commonly associated with truth, communication, intuition, and conscious awareness.

We begin with the science of sodalite, including its mineral structure, its connection to lapis lazuli, and the fascinating sodalite variety known as hackmanite, which can actually change color in response to light.

From there, we move into sodalite’s history, including its formal description in 1811 and its earlier use in Mesoamerica, before exploring the surprisingly consistent themes found throughout modern crystal traditions.

Again and again, sodalite appears at the intersection of logic and intuition.

It asks us to notice our thoughts, question our patterns, recognize what is actually true for us, and become conscious of whether the lives we are creating align with the values we claim to hold.

In this episode, we explore sodalite through three simple ideas:

Know your truth.
Speak your truth.
Live your truth.

We also connect sodalite with the psychology of metacognition and habitual behavior, exploring why awareness is often the first step toward meaningful change.

And in our tarot connection for this stone, we meet Justice—a card of truth, discernment, accountability, balance, and conscious choice.

At the end of the episode, I’ll guide you through a simple sodalite alignment practice using three questions:

What do I know?
What do I intuitively feel?
What would alignment look like?

Because perhaps sodalite doesn’t give us answers we don’t already possess.

Perhaps it simply helps us bring what has been hidden into the light.

In this episode:

• The geology and mineralogy of sodalite
• Why sodalite is sometimes confused with lapis lazuli
• Hackmanite and the science of tenebrescence
• The history and naming of sodalite
• Sodalite’s connection with truth and conscious awareness
• Logic versus intuition—and why we may need both
• Throat and third-eye symbolism
• Metacognition, habits, and old patterns
• Why knowing your truth is different from living it
• The tarot card Justice
• A simple sodalite ritual for clarity and alignment

Journal prompts:

What do I know to be true?

What do I intuitively feel or know?

Where are my actions out of alignment with what I say I want?

What is one conscious choice I can make today to bring myself back into alignment?

✨ The Crystal Library is a space where we explore the science, history, folklore, and magic of the stones we love—and discover what they might teach us about ourselves.

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

Coming home from the Powerhouse Women Conference, I had absolutely nothing prepared for this week’s episode.

And maybe that was exactly the point.

Instead of forcing myself to immediately jump back into researching, recording, creating, and checking things off my list, I let myself actually be present for the experience. And when I got home, I sat down behind the microphone without a script, without an outline, and without really knowing where this conversation was going to go.

What came out was something I think I really needed to say.

In this episode, I’m talking about what it has actually felt like to become more open about who I am—the crystals, the witchcraft, the spirituality, the podcast, and all the parts of myself I kept hidden for years because I was afraid of what other people might think.

Because here’s something I’ve learned: when you finally start showing up as yourself, not everyone is going to come with you.

Some of the people you thought would be your biggest cheerleaders may go completely silent. Some friendships may change. Some people may not understand the version of you that you’re becoming.

And then, somehow, completely unexpected people show up and remind you exactly why you kept going.

We’re talking about finding the people who truly have your back, supporting your friends when they’re brave enough to chase something they love, starting over at any age, allowing yourself to evolve beyond the career or identity you chose decades ago, and why you absolutely do not need to make yourself more palatable for other people.

I also reflect on how much my own life has changed since starting Big Crystal Energy—and what this podcast really means to me now.

Because Big Crystal Energy was never just about crystals.

It’s about having big energy for your own life.

It’s about waking up with something that excites you. It’s about following the things that keep pulling at your heart. It’s about allowing yourself to change, evolve, start something new, and become someone you couldn't have imagined being five or ten years ago.

And sometimes? It’s about showing up messy, turning on the microphone, and just fucking doing it.

In this episode, we talk about:

• Refusing to shrink yourself to make other people comfortable
• What happens when the people you expected to support you don’t
• Finding unexpected friendships and people who truly cheer for you
• Why supporting your friends’ dreams matters more than you realize
• Starting something new later in life
• Allowing yourself to evolve beyond the career or identity you once chose
• Becoming more open about my identity as a witch
• Why other people are probably thinking about you far less than you think
• Choosing authenticity over being palatable
• What Big Crystal Energy really means to me
• Why sometimes done really is better than perfect

If there is something sitting on your heart that you cannot stop thinking about, consider this your reminder that you do not need everyone else to understand it before you begin.

You just need to have your own back.

And if you need a witchy fucking cheerleader in your corner? I’m here.

✨ Find me on Instagram: @bigcrystalenergy.ash

And if you love the show, leaving a rating or review is one of the best ways you can support Big Crystal Energy—and apparently, acts of service are my podcast love language. 🖤

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

What if everything you think you know about fairies is only a tiny—and very modern—piece of the story?

In this episode of Big Crystal Energy, I’m joined by Brandon Becker of Inside the Hollow Hills for a fascinating deep dive into Faery Craft, the Good People, and the ancient relationship between humans and the beings of the Otherworld.

Brandon’s path into this work began with an interest in megaliths, archaeoastronomy, and ancient sites across Ireland and the British Isles. But as he dug deeper, he began noticing something: again and again, these ancient places were intertwined with folklore surrounding the Good People.

That curiosity eventually became a practice—and a deeply researched exploration of what our relationship with these beings may have looked like thousands of years ago.

We talk about why the tiny, winged fairy of Victorian art is such a recent interpretation; the strange, beautiful, sometimes unsettling ways the Good People appear throughout folklore; and why Brandon describes these beings as chthonic, primal, and deeply connected to the natural world.

We also get into the part of Faery Craft that doesn't always make it onto the pretty side of social media: risk, reciprocity, boundaries, offerings, pact-making, and why working with the Good People isn't necessarily something everyone should do.

Brandon shares how his reconstructionist approach led him to research ancient ritual practices, seasonal observances, natural ritual tools, votive offerings, and the importance of understanding why we do something rather than simply repeating a practice because we read it in a book.

We also talk about:

• Megaliths, fairy mounds, and entrances to the Otherworld
• Why the Good People aren't necessarily the tiny winged fairies of popular culture
• Glamour and the uncanny nature of encounters with the Other Crowd
• Why terms like Good People and Good Neighbors are traditionally used
• The chthonic and underworld associations of Faery lore
• Why working with these beings requires caution and respect
• Offerings, propitiation, and cultivating relationships with the Good People
• Faery familiars and pact-making
• The importance of establishing boundaries before entering into spiritual agreements
• Working with natural and handmade ritual tools
• Brandon's beautiful story of receiving a willow stang
• The solstices and cross-quarter days in his reconstructed practice
• His forthcoming book exploring the ancient roots of humanity's relationship with the Good People

And because apparently we couldn't have an entire conversation about the Otherworld without things getting a little weird... toward the end of our conversation, I notice what looks like a moving shadow behind Brandon.

There were no other humans in the room.

Make of that what you will. 👀

Brandon's forthcoming book is scheduled for publication through Moon Books in November 2027, and we also talk about what readers can expect from his exploration of archaeology, folklore, belief, and reconstructed practice.

Find Brandon:

Threads: Inside the Hollow Hills
YouTube: Inside the Hollow Hills

✨ Find Big Crystal Energy:
Instagram + Threads: @bigcrystalenergy.ash
Website: bigcrystalenergy.com

If you enjoyed this episode, follow Big Crystal Energy wherever you listen to podcasts, leave a rating or review, and send this episode to the friend who knows that fairies are a whole lot stranger than Tinker Bell.

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com

For almost two hundred years, smithsonite didn't have a name of its own. It was lumped together with a completely different mineral, hemimorphite, under the folk name "calamine" — used by the Romans to make brass, by Tang Dynasty artisans to smelt coins, and by medieval physicians to treat skin conditions, all without anyone realizing they were handling two different substances.

In this episode, we trace how smithsonite finally got its own identity — and how many other systems still can't agree on where its boundaries sit. We audit the physical healing claims attached to this stone across multiple reference sources, none of which trace back to an identifiable origin. We look closely at one claim that borrows real chemistry (smithsonite's genuine zinc content) to lend false authority to an unrelated metaphysical claim. We build a structural tarot correspondence to Judgement, and close with a practice for working with any stone — smithsonite included — without relying on claims that can't be verified.

In this episode:

• The centuries-long confusion between smithsonite and hemimorphite, and how James Smithson drew the line
• Smithson's fortune, the founding of the Smithsonian Institution, and the fitting irony underneath it
• "Bonamite" — smithsonite's commercial alter-ego, and the pun behind its name
• What actually converges across independent sources (and why that still isn't proof)
• An audited list of smithsonite's physical healing claims, and why none of them hold up
• A close look at how real chemistry gets borrowed to authorize unrelated metaphysical claims
• Smithsonite's tarot correspondence to Judgement, and why it's a structural match, not a mood match
• The Boundary Inventory: a way to work with smithsonite — or any object — without unprovable claims

Referenced sources:
Judy Hall, The Crystal Bible; Cassandra Eason, 1001 Crystals; Athena Perrakis, Crystalpedia; Nicholas Pearson, Crystal Basics; Melody, Love Is in the Earth; Biddy Tarot (consulted for the Judgement correspondence)

Connect with Big Crystal Energy:
Instagram & Threads: @bigcrystalenergy.ash

Send me any questions or comments you may have and I will answer them on upcoming podcast episodes!! Looking forward to hearing from you!

Please message me with any questions or comments. 
bigcrystalenergypodcast @gmail.com