Black, Female & Dating

Louis Tongbong Thomson and I, talked so much that we went over time, but it was worth it.

As another special for Black History Month, I was very honoured to sit down and get another male perspective. Louis brought some seriously deep conversation, looking at the similarities between our experiences as Black heterosexual woman and Black gay man.

One of the many things we have in common is being unapologetically Black and more importantly how we got there.

Louis dropped in a very powerful James Baldwin quote:

“It took many years of vomiting up all the filth I’d been taught about myself, and half-believed, before I was able to walk on the earth as though I had a right to be here.”

Need I say more?

When I sat down with India Gary-Martin, who from here on in, will be known as Aunty, I got more than I bargained for.

I started the podcast, but Aunty, Oprah'd me and started asking me questions. I answered as a good host does and then finally managed to get the mic back.

This was some good Aunty conversation and great perspectives from 2 generations, looking at the dating scene and how it's changed and what that has meant for some Black women.

You will not be disappointed!

As part of Black History Month, I wanted to do a special. It is all about giving us Black women a forum to talk honestly about our past and present experiences, but I thought let me bring in a man.

Let me hear what he has to say and what his take is on the dating scene and love and life. I got to sit down with none other than James Pogson.

If you don't know who he is, then you had better get to know him. James dished out some next level secrets, so if you want to learn about what Black men say, to get out of doing things. Tune in right here...

I was so happy to speak to Aileen Puhlmann, as she brought a completely new view to this topic.

Aileen is Ghanaian-German and a single mother, who has recently moved back to Germany, having lived in South Africa and London. Not to mention her own journey and experiences of getting comfortable within her Blackness to facing racism in Germany.

Aileen made me laugh, made me cry and made me think. The topics went deep. From her approach to dating being a single mum to her expectations of her partner understanding what it means to be Black and the challenges we face.

Sit back, relax and enjoy.

When you sit down with Amini Kajunju, I warn you, you need to come ready.

Amini is fearless. Fearlessly truthful and fearlessly open, so when she said to me, 'let's talk about money', I said yes. Money is one of those taboo topics, that we never quite feel comfortable talking about either when dating or in relationships, but it is so important.

Besides this, we spoke about relationship power dynamics, how your upbringing affects your choices of mate and so much more.

And the best part is, we didn't always agree with each other. Prepare yourself for some fireworks.

This week, Kwamara Thompson, founder of 'I am a Black Woman, Yes I Matter!' joined me and really broke it down. Especially what it means to walk in her truth.

Just because she is single doesn't mean that she plans to let other people define, how she should live her life.

We went back in her dating archives and we covered the good and the really ugly.

Kwamara truly personifies how to walk in your truth and that staying true to yourself, is the best way to live.

This week I sat down with Annie Mbako, D&I Consultant and let me tell you, she isn't one to play around. She saves some real nuggets for the end.

In this episode, we discuss her being born in Cameroon and then the transition to life in North Wales. How it was being the only Black family and how her experiences differed from her brother's in high school.

And Annie gives some real talk about finding and appreciating her own value. It is that time, ladies!

As usual, we laughed, we cried a little and threw a lot of side-eye.

This week I sat down with Shereen Daniels, MD at HR rewired. I was so excited that I even managed to get the name of my podcast wrong. Shame!

We covered the spectrum of looking at our younger selves, our dating choices and how to get to that safe space in a relationship.

You might want to turn the volume down!

You can find us on Instagram:

@leannemm

@shereen_daniels