Black Men Unlearning

On this episode of BMU, the guys answer an email from a listener about forgiveness. Their answer flows into a larger discussion about how we learn the process of forgiveness, navigating conflict in non-avoidant ways, and understanding what motivates us to forgive. 

On this episode of BMU, the guys explore the challenges of having hard conversations. They unpack their early experience discussing difficult topics with family and the ways people pleasing can tempt us to embrace false peace and put off healthy conflict. Michael B. Jordan headlines our "Really, Bruh?" segment.

The guys are back with a pre-Valentine's Day discussion about attraction and arousal. This episode considers the difference between the two, whether we should be pursuing one or both, and how our society is designed to bias us toward quick fixes.

In this episode, the guys discuss self-love. Their conversation touches on what self-love looks like in practice and how we can plug into good sources rather than always pouring out. They also answer the popular question of whether we have to learn to love ourselves before we can love others or be loved by others. 

The guys close out 2022 with an evaluation of the false dichotomy between logic and feelings. Their discussion includes a breakdown of the societal implications of establishing a binary relationship between logic and feelings, the importance of balancing the two, and a dope real-world example of logic without feeling involving John Coltrane and a robot (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjONQNUU8Fg). This week's really bruh focuses on recent hot-takery surrounding Megan Thee Stallion and Brittney Griner. 

In this 30th episode (!) of BMU, the guys discuss the shame their upbringings associated with sex and how it shaped their journeys learning about themselves and their desires. The discussion unpacks the problems with Christian instruction around sex, identifies the issues with an "all red flags" approach to sex and sexuality, and highlights some of the real consequences of our commitment to doing things the way we've always done them. Kyle and Edwin share some vulnerable stories about the effects of shame on their own journeys of self-discovery, and open up about the work they're doing to unlearn the belief that their bodies, sex, and sexuality are problems. 

In this episode of Black Men Unlearning, the guys sit with the concept of building and leaving legacies. The conversation considers how our egos, the past, present, and future all factor in to how we pursue establishing legacies for ourselves. This week's "Really, Bruh?" addresses the #RecastTChalla trending topic, referencing a conversation between Ta-Nehisi Coates and Ryan Coogler from the first episode of Wakanda Forever: The Official Black Panther Podcast. We highly recommend you check it out.

The discussion also references a previous BMU conversation about the multitudes we contain in EP23: "We Wear the Mask." 

The guys discuss Takeoff's untimely death and the sometimes uncomfortable feeling of grieving people we don't know personally. The episode criticizes TMZ's "reporting" and highlights the challenge of making space for grief while pictures and videos of the deaths of Black folks are treated as clickbait and viral content. This week's "Really, bruh?" is dedicated to the Brooklyn Nets.

The guys discuss adulting, particularly as it pertains to the pursuit of lives that bring us joy. The conversation leads to them figuring out when the concept of adulting entered our collective consciousness, and evaluate our beliefs about who is deserving of leisure. This week's "Really, bruh?" wonders where all the crabs have gone.

It's a "Really. bruh?" takeover! Kyle and Edwin extend the segment into an entire episode, taking Kanye (Comrade West) to task, contending with the announcement of the Super Bowl Halftime show and the billionaire status of Rihanna and Jay-Z, taking LeBron to task for his support of Tory Lanez, and discussing Ime Udoka's foolishness. 

The show references Bassey Ikpi's "I'm Telling the Truth But I'm Lying," a memoir in which she explores her experiences with bipolar II and anxiety.