Breaker's Point Podcast

We're sick and tired of your ism-schism gameDy'n' and go to Heaven in-a Jesus' name, LordWe know when we understandAlmighty God is a living man

You can fool some people sometimesBut you can't fool all the people all the timeSo now we see the light We gonna stand up for our rights

- Bob Marley

I love words, and I love talking, and I love writing, but sometimes I have way too much to say and way too much to write. It is overwhelming. At some point in processing all of my emotions and attempting to sum them up in some kind of digestible way, I reach a mental roadblock. That is where I turn to music. I find it much easier and perhaps more individually meaningful to express myself in song. That is why not only am I a songwriter, I am simply just a general lover of music. This is nothing new. Why am I saying this? I have so much to say about the overturning of Roe v. Wade and it is putting my mind in the situation that I have described. There is not much that I can say that has not already been said. This decision is not only an attack on all women, but racism rears its ugly head again as it is an attack on BIPOC communities and people with lower income in this country. Anybody who is paying attention knows this. The call to action here lies in the Bob Marley song above. As for me; this is my newsletter so I guess I have to give my personal take on this matter and write about it from a personal standpoint. This is where music comes in. The truth is that I have no editorial. I do have money to donate to abortion funds that will help the people most directly impacted by this. The other thing I have is my voice and my privilege, and the only way that I feel I am able to communicate my feelings and my initiative is by singing about it. Music also brings joy. I think it is imperative to have some semblance of that, and to remind yourself that it is okay to be happy in this armageddon. I am not saying that singing takes the nationwide pain away, but music is definitely something to lean on. I will talk a little bit more about this in the section where I discuss this week’s song.

It is difficult to segway out of that, but on the topic of joy and music, I would like to remind everyone that I am playing my first New York City show on Thursday at The Delancey in Manhattan. I am so excited, and I am looking forward to giving people and myself the great time that we all so desperately need. It is going a hell of a night, and you are going to want to be a part of it. I have created a setlist that I feel not only highlights all the layers of my artistry but the immense talent of the musicians in my band. I cannot thank all of them enough for sharing their talents with me.

I also just bought tickets to the Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes show on Saturday. Look, I like Southside, but I am there for one reason, and it is the possible guest appearance of the man who gave Southside Johnny his name (and wrote many of his songs). I think he will show up. This is his adopted hometown and a good friend with who he has been known to sit in with many times before. He was just in London for his equestrian daughter’s competition. That is over, and where would he rather be the weekend before the 4th of July other than the ol’ jersey shore? He could literally come onstage for two minutes, belch in the mic, and leave the stage and it would be worth the price of admission just to be in his presence after four years. Seeing him would give me possibly enough life to last me until the first leg of the 2023 US tour.

Grateful Eight:

* I just mentioned to my family that one thing I treasure is when Sam sings or hums along to a Bruce song without deliberately doing it for the benefit of anyone else. He did it the other day with Murder Incorporated. I know there is no way he could not know at least 100 Bruce songs in my family, but most of the time you would have no idea.

* New guitar strings. Quick story: I thought my guitar’s intonation was all out of wack and that the bridge saddles need to be fixed, so I called Bill at Dave’s Sound. He asked me how long it has been since I have changed the strings. I could not even remember, and he told me that if the strings were shot the intonation is going to be terrible and if you change your strings, the intonation will likely be perfect. And it was. That was embarrassing, but I changed the strings and now the thing is playing and sounding better than ever. Who knew?

* My own money. The thing with the music industry and many industries for that matter is that they do not pay their interns. I need money badly and cannot be strictly relying on my parents anymore for going out and all other college person activities. (That sounds super suspicious, but it is not I promise you.) I got a job delivering pizzas and in three shifts I have been racking in the dough. Lol.

* Jeff McNeil. The guy is an unbelievable baseball player. The lineup is missing him severely right now and I hope that after this off day he will be back in it. I also love his grit. We have a gritty team over there in Flushing.

* That no one gave me s**t that there was no newsletter last week. Sorry!

* My friends and I in Kd (if you don’t know what that is do better) have been utilizing voice messaging and it is absolutely hilarious. Grateful for voice messaging, shoutout Tim Cook for that feature.

* Robert Knott Jr.

* The blues, my friend. There ain’t nothing better.

This Week’s Rare Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Recording: The Pill by Loretta Lynn

In light of the strike down of all the human rights that have come from the overturning of Roe v. Wade, I covered this Loretta Lynn song about birth control. This song came out in 1975 around the time that birth control pills were introduced as a means of contraception. It marked the dawn of women taking control of their own bodies and reproductive rights. It must have gone over well with the public right? Wrong, of course. It was met with dismay by country music radio stations that refused to play it and her record label did not let her release it for three years. It was actually recorded in 1972. Of course, there were many country hits at the time about sex written and recorded by male artists. It is also apropos to mention that sexism within country music exists just as much today. It is so much harder for them to break through and write about topics that simply should not be taboo for them. “The Pill” did become massively popular though and introduced the birth control pill to many lower-income areas or parts of the country that were either unfamiliar with or unable to attain this contraceptive. I do not know how this song is going to sound from the voice of a straight white male, but I hope you like it. It is an important song that broke barriers and hits the nail on the head with each verse as they cultivate an anthem for women. Man, does it feel depressing that the context around this song is not so different from what we are experiencing now. I also really like this era of country music.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

TGIF, right? I have a lot to report so I will get right to it. My show last Friday went really great, in spite of encountering adversity when keyboardist, Chance Mazzo came down with a double ear infection and a fever the day of the show. We were already without Matty, which took us from a five-piece band to a four-piece band. Then, lo and behold, we became a trio with me on guitar and vocals, Jack Motherway on drums, and Xander Haselman playing some wicked bass, which was the key to this performance. I had not performed as a trio since the talent show at sleepaway camp when I was about 13. It gave me an opportunity to showcase my punk sensibilities as we played every song 25% faster than the tempo on the recordings. I also played many guitar solos, most of which I usually delegate to Matty or even Chance to play on the keyboard, but it was fun to play it myself. When you have amazing musicians like Matty and Chance, it is hard to justify calling your own number; but I do plan on doing that more. I was going to do a version of my song, “Unparalleled” with just Chance playing the piano and myself singing, but with Chance sick, I swapped it for the live debut of a song I wrote called “Over Yonder, in the Woods.” I played it by myself and it seemed like the audience liked it. It is always a funny thing to announce that I am going to play a brand new song during a show because most of my songs are brand new to the audience. However, I like to believe it makes the audience feel special and that it makes the audience listen maybe a little more closely than they would have. That could be off though. We also were going to do a cover of The J. Geils Band’s “Must of Got Lost” (which I just love the incorrect grammar, very rock n roll), but it was pretty heavy on piano so we went with a version of The Who’s “The Seeker”, a personal favorite Who song of mine. It was a fun show and warmed us up for our set at The Delancey on the Lower East Side of Manhattan on Thursday 6/30. Mnemonic Advice cannot wait to see you there!

I saw Phoebe Bridgers at Prospect Park in Brooklyn on Tuesday. When I was in high school and at the beginning of college, I was so obsessed with Phoebe’s music. It is infectious and her voice and delivery of her brilliant lyrics find their way right to your heart. With that being said, she does not have a lot of music out and I think I played her music to death years ago, to the point where I got sick of it. Phoebe grew massively in popularity in the time since, and I am so happy for her, but her new obsessive fanbase turned me off. I acknowledge that this is a ridiculous thing to say because not only is it not fair to Phoebe, I happen to be the most obsessive Bruce Springsteen and Wilco fan on the planet. I guess it has been a realization that people like me are really annoying. Anyway, I had not played either of her albums for about a year leading up to the show; not for any particular reason other than I wore them out a bit. It made Phoebe’s music feel fresh and lively to me at the show, and I remembered why I loved her so much in the first place. The reason is she is a beautiful singer, a sharp and clever songwriter, and a cool-ass person! Her live performance exceeded my expectations, and it was just a really fun night. By the way, the subtitle of the column today is a Phoebe lyric. I have no idea what it means, but it sounds pretty cool and catchy.

Grateful Eight:

* I am grateful that my friends come to my shows. I definitely push them, but I have been to so many of their games in high school. Fair enough, right?

* My friend and drummer, Nick sent me a Snapchat yesterday of him playing my song “Living a Myth” on his way to the Dodgers game, which was really cool and nice of him. It is amazing to have actual proof that people like my music.

* Last summer I choked at Cava. I had Cava yesterday for the first time since and I did not choke, so that was pretty cool.

* Mexican rice. I love all types of rice be it Chinese or Indian or sushi or Mediterranean or even a risotto, but Mexican rice hits like none other.

* I found this band on TikTok called Thumpasaurus. You have to check them out, it is the goofiest most ridiculous thing I have ever seen but I am obsessed with it. I cannot watch it without smiling. YouTube “I’m Too Funky.”

* I have been having a lot of writing inspiration recently. It often happens after I see a concert.

* Most of my seasonal allergies are gone, so now it is just Henry that is affecting me, but I can handle that.

* New Bartees Strange album out today. I need to listen!

This Week’s Rare Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Recording: “Living a Myth”

This is a major one. It seems to be a song of mine that people really love. I really like it too because I poured a lot of my heart into it to give myself some perspective if and when I am struggling. It is about coming to terms with the possibility that your idea of yourself and other people is inaccurate. Maybe it seems accurate to you, but everyone else may not see it that way. Does that make sense? The other thing it deals with is trying to accept help, which I think we condition ourselves not to do. Do not get me wrong, it is critical in life to be able to problem-solve and grow on your own, but you need to listen to people who have your best interest in mind. Ditch the skepticism when it pertains to people that you know are there for you. Musicwise, I like that the song is a short, rigid in structure, and a catchy two-and-a-half minutes long with no frills. It bursts through the door and then it’s gone. I originally recorded this song as a group project for my music production class about a year ago. That version was cool, but I realized I really do not like the way it turned out at all. We got a little too fancy with it. I re-recorded it recently as a demo, which is what is linked here.

“Living a Myth”

Sit down, you’re drunk

And you don’t know what you are

The world in you periphery will only get you so far

Close your eyes, tunnel visualize the road you’re on

Monsters lurk beside you giving you toxic perception

‘Cause if you’re not as sad as all of them

Then you’ve attained perfection

There’s an easy way to ease all pain

But pain is an urchin, pain is certain, so let it in

Maybe you’re something else to begin with

Maybe you’re living a myth

Calm down you’re fucked

But fucked is all you are

They say changing your brain can give you everything you’re not

And you can rest like Buddha in the lion’s den of thought

After years of playing tricks

Your mind clears and leaves you lacking

And you learn to surf among the waves

And feelings have no backing

There’s a wave in you deluged in truth

Comes crashing like The Comet

You just want to cry and vomit, need some relief

Maybe you’re something else to begin with

Maybe you’re living a myth

You won’t lie to yourself again

The choices that you make deliver pain when you’re awake

Maybe you’re something else to begin with

Maybe you’re living a myth

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

Oh man, just typing that subtitle made me want to spin some Hendrix. Hendrix is one of those artists that every single generation can and will appreciate. If you ask any human in the world who the best guitarist of all time is, I am willing to wager that 75% of people will say Jimi Hendrix. I think that is awesome. It is also true. Mind you the greatest guitarist of all time and my favorite guitarists of all time are two different lists but Hendrix overlaps. Also, emphasis on ‘greatest’ and not ‘best’. Two entirely different adjectives.

Anyway, hello. Welcome back here. I am sorry that this is coming out so late. I actually sat down to write it on Monday but had absolutely nothing to say. Then I started my internship and whatnot. Whatever. Here is number thirteen. But yeah, I started my internship at Primary Wave music; a music publishing and management company near Union Square. This seems like it is going to be a fun internship that will yield rewarding knowledge. Primary Wave’s business intersects with a lot of the music industry work that I am interested in. They own dozens of famous catalogs from James Brown to Devo to Bob Marley to Smokey Robinson to Sly and the Family Stone; the list goes on. I am interested in finding ways to connect people who are my age with this classic, seminal music. I think it is highly possible because great music stands the test of time. It is just not as in-your-face as today’s music because it is easy to market an artist who is more recent and currently active. However, this Kate Bush phenomenon fills me with a lot of hope. For those who have not been following, the show Stranger Things (really popular with my demographic) used Kate Bush’s “Running Up That Hill (A Deal With God)” in a pivotal scene, and as a result, it has skyrocketed back to the top of the charts. It has landed at #8 on the US Billboard Charts and #6 in the UK. Gen Z discovering the wonderful pop music of Kate Bush was not on my 2022 bingo board, but I am elated that this is happening. I told Abby who is always in tune with what music is viral at any given moment, that the song was from 1985 and she had not even realized that. It goes to show how influential that era of music still is; so much so that it can sit in the Billboard Top Ten without sticking out like a sore thumb. Suffice it to say, I am looking forward to making content for these legendary artists from Primary Wave. Let’s see if we can get “Whip It” back into the Top Ten. Although, that specific song might be a bit anachronistic. Maybe not though! It is fun and catchy as hell.

I would like to remind everyone that I have a show at Redhouse in Boonton, NJ today. I will link the website to purchase tickets at the end of this newsletter. It is going to be an awesome night. I go on at 8:15 and I will play for a half-hour. The band sounds really tight and everyone is having a lot of fun with this set. I have noticed in rehearsals that there has been a lot of smiling going on. People do not smile enough anymore on stage. That honestly used to be me, but showing your overt happiness is contagious and important. I want to bring the old-school energy of a rock show without any gimmicks or cliches. I get irritated sometimes when current artists/bands create somewhat of a mockery of their performance to be tongue-in-cheek or ironic; like going back-to-back with the lead guitarist or coordinating really dumb moves or routines during certain songs that come off to me as a heaping pile of cringe. I want to feel the authenticity in a live performance. Authenticity is my biggest value when it comes to writing, recording, and performing music. I want to believe you. It is something I think of as I meticulously create setlists, determine myself and the players’ positioning onstage, tweak the sound of the drums and guitars, choose the attire that I wear (I am team Keep Your Shirt On 2022), how the songs are counted off, the jokes, banter, and sometimes serious PSAs that I will make during a set, the manner of which I f*****g walk onstage and grab my guitar at the beginning of the set. I am extremely calculated with the way I present myself, my music, and my band. I think you absolutely have to be or you can become a parody of yourself or a deer in headlights. The trick is to make it all look spontaneous without deceiving the audience. The truth is my pragmatism allows me to be spontaneous and just enjoy myself without second-guessing a single thing that happens on that stage—it has all been premeditated. Don’t get it twisted, I don’t plan everything, and obviously, shows do not always go the way you expect them to go. However, as Julie Chen-Moonves says, expect the unexpected. Vision and preparation put you in the position to do that, and be unphased by anything that happens during the set. I kind of learned about my stubbornness in Montville School of Rock where I would have a very clear and specific idea of how a song should be presented, and how it should sound, and I hated compromising that. It sucked the fun out of it for me sometimes. I think that is part of the reason why things ended the way they did for me there, and I take accountability for any disrespect or negative ego that I showed to people who were not on the same page as me. On the flip side, Montville School of Rock taught me how to be in a band which is also extremely important. Of course, there are going to be compromises because that is pretty much a part of life. You have to meet these compromises with grace. However, it is important to have an idea of what you are NOT willing to compromise. Alright, I have been rambling but I love talking about this stuff. Concerts make me feel exorbitant amounts of joy; joy that I want to replicate when it is me on the stage. I think about it too much though.

Grateful Eight:

* Meatballs

* My band is so easy to work with and on the ball. That is not always the case.

* Iced cold Cherry Coke Zero

* I am grateful to live in a state with stricter gun laws, so I only have to fear for my life a little bit from day to day. I cannot imagine how fearful people feel in states with virtually no gun laws. Not to get super fear-mongering, but what reason does anyone have to be confident that they are not next when they go to school or work or the supermarket or a nightclub? What more can I say that has not already been said? I remain hopeless, but that does not mean I am not going to speak my mind and help the situation.

* I am grateful that I get to go to the city twice every week for my internship. I have always loved New York and now I have a reason to go often.

* You people still read my rambling on these things. Some of you even look forward to it! Why?

* Detroit Medley. Bruce needs to bring that one back even if it is only five minutes and not fifteen. The old versions are the best though.

* Exile on Main Street. I love Mick Taylor era Stones the best for sure and this album is everything a rock album should be and nothing it is not. There are few more fun albums out there.

This Week’s Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Rare Recording: Unkind is Kind

This is my newest song. I wrote it last week. It is a good song to play by myself with harmonica and acoustic guitar but it also has the potential to rock. I had fun writing these lyrics because I think they evoke mystery. I am not even sure if I know what I am talking about, but it feels right. It is not nonsense, I tried to incorporate imagery and metaphor, but it leaves the listener to interpret it in his or her own way. Although I usually am very clear and direct with my lyrics, I think lyrics are more about capturing a feeling rather than a definitive meaning. That is all I really have to say about this one. It is young and I am still processing it. Sometimes the songs explain themselves to me once they marinate.

“Unkind is Kind”

My radio is tuned to fear 

I got nothing but static around here

Just as a deer skitters cross the road

I took a gamble like the butt of the joke

The universe turned …

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

Welcome to the first Wednesday Breaker’s Point! I am sorry that I am so late with this one, but Monday was a holiday, so give me some slack there. As for Tuesday, well, I was busy. This is a jam-packed newsletter today because I have a lot to write about. First, I would like to announce that I will be playing a show at Redhouse in Boonton on Friday, June 10th. It is my first show since I believe my last fall semester, and I am so excited about it. I am going with a four-piece this time around as Matty cannot make the show. I also have Xander Haselman, a new character in the Mnemonic Advice world, on bass with me for this show. I have never played with him, but I am excited to as he is a great musician. I always have fun playing at Redhouse, and it is a room that I am not only comfortable in but has felt like a home for my music over the last several years. I want to thank Adri for always finding a slot for me. I am going to do something special for this great audience, which presumably will mostly consist of my real ride-or-die fans; even if they are really just my relatives and friends. I encourage all of my readers to come. I also have another big show announcement that is still in the works, so I do not want to spill the beans now but stay tuned.

I was at Wilco’s Solid Sound festival last weekend. It did not disappoint at all, and if you do not mind, I would love to tell you about it. The lineup featured a lot of amazing artists over the three days. I came into Friday, not a huge Sylvan Esso fan but their set was fun, and the danceable beats and synths sounded punchy and energetic coming out of the PA on Joe’s Field. There were a handful of awesome sets on Saturday including Sam Evian, who I have been a fan of for some time now. He is an amazing songwriter and multi-instrumentalist, as well as a producer for some big names, namely Big Thief. I have heard saxophone on his recordings, but I never knew that he was the one playing it. Hand Habits was also great. Meg Duffy is the frontperson in that band and their signature guitar style and tone set them apart from many of their indie folk-rock peers. Japanese Breakfast opened for Wilco on Saturday, and they really won me over. I loved their album Soft Sounds From Another Planet, but I was not totally in love with their most recent album Jubilee despite it getting high praise from industry normies. That typically happens. The more mainstream media and fans are usually an album late to the party. However, the songs sounded amazing live and Michelle Zauner is a real professional frontwoman. Many indie rockers struggle with commanding the stage in a club, let alone a festival, but Michelle worked the crowd with ease in between funny quips about how much she has stolen from her favorite band, Wilco. In fact, at the end of her set, the virtuosic Wilco lead-guitarist, Nels Cline came out and ripped a face-melting three-minute solo that had the festival grounds in orbit. I think I saw his feet levitating above the ground.

That brings me to Wilco. They debuted their brand-new album Cruel Country, a 77-minute 21-track country-inspired epic. I mentioned last week that the band had given Solid Sound ticket holders a code to download the album early. I had listened to the album about three times leading up to the show. I enjoyed it marginally with each listen, and the live performance cemented it for me, as an instant classic in the Wilco catalog. The band was clearly prepared and it might have been towards the upper-echelon of Wilco concerts that I have been to. I am not ordinarily a very spiritual person, but once in a while at concerts, I feel a spiritual power. I really do. It makes me believe in the universe. It feels like there are three energies at the show; the band, the audience, and the larger force that they manufacture together. It is not like I do not enjoy myself when I do not feel this, for example, the second night was an incredible show but the spiritual feeling was not there. It was the first night though. It was clear that Jeff Tweedy was elated to be back at Solid Sound and playing material that he felt super connected to and proud of. The band was locked in too. It was an epic night that will go down in Wilco history. I think I saw Jeff wiping tears as he left the stage. It was so special.

The second night was amazing as well. Wilco played four out of what may be my top five to ten songs of theirs. Michelle Zauner sang a great rendition of “Jesus etc.'“ The next day, Jeff Tweedy closed out the festival with his solo band. He brought up David Byrne for the last song which was a total exciting surprise. I just love Jeff and Wilco. It is amazing that older acts such as David Byrne have such a reverence for them. However, it is even cooler how much praise and respect Wilco gets from the current indie music scene. This is not only because their music is so influential, but also because Jeff makes it his duty to mentor younger artists in the way he wishes he was when he was younger. Ugh, he is just the best.

Grateful Eight

* Cruel Country

* The New York Rangers are going to the Eastern Conference Finals! I cannot pretend to have predicted this.

* The Mets are currently 10 games up in first place in the NL East. It is hard for me to come to grips with the fact that this team may actually be good. The Jury is still out though. I am much too battered.

* Spending quality time with my dad at Solid Sound. It was also fun to be an honorary member of his wacky crew.

* The Broccoli Bar at Solid Sound. It is nuts they give you broccoli cooked in three different ways with rice and pickled vegetables. It is so delicious. I am a big broccoli guy, but it has no business being THAT good.

* I got an internship!

* The opportunity to play music in front of people for the first time in a while.

* Henry sat with me today as I played acoustic guitar. It felt special.

This Week’s Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Rare Recording: “Tired of Taking It Out on You.”

I did promise a reader that this week’s song would be an original, but I am sorry it is a cover once again. There definitely will be an original included next week. But this week I wanted to sing a song off of Cruel Country. I tried a handful of my favorite songs from the record, but this one suited my voice the best (even as I battled some allergies to sing it). I love the line “Freeze my warmth away, tear the tears out of my quiet face”. The lyrics to this song are just so amazing and all the other ones from the album, to be honest. I usually do not include lyrics in the newsletter when I do a cover. These lyrics are so good and maybe a little more unfamiliar to my readers, so here they are; from the pen of Jefferey Scot Tweedy.

I'm tired of taking it out on youTired of needing to

Freeze my warmth awayTear the tears out of your quiet faceI can't face the way I am with youOr replace the bite I'm chewing throughOh, I'm tired of taking it out on you

I crave crazy times againOur nights, our nights would never end

I'm ashamed of who I amI'm in pain, so I strive

To the nearest starStreet light over an idling car

Move across the seatI'm going to needYou to drive these last few miles'Cause I'm tired of taking it out on you

Ooh-oohOoh-ooh

Freeze my warmth awayTear the tears out of your quiet faceI can't take the way I am with youOr recreate things we used to doI'm tired of taking it out on you

Ooh-oohOoh-oohOoh-ooh

I'm tired of taking it out on you

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

It is happening. Ladies and gentlemen this is not a drill. Today Bruce Springsteen’s social media accounts posted a video with highlights from 2016’s The River tour with “Born in the USA” in the background. The end of the video said “May 24th, 2022 brucespringsteen.net.” Do you know what that means? That means that Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band will announce a tour tomorrow. I have not seen a Bruce concert (excluding Broadway which is beautiful but more a show than a concert) since 2016. I have been itching for it for so long and it seems like tomorrow I will at least know when I will be able to scratch the itch. Big things people.

I also want to take a moment and thank people once again for reading these and reading them so intently week to week. It means a lot to me and to be honest, I did not expect it at all. But you guys seem to like it and I have fun writing it so we shall continue. It is funny; a lot of times I do not remember what I write here and someone will say something to me about my life or my thoughts and I am like “how in the world do you know that?” It is all good stuff though. I love all my readers, shoutout you.

I have been home for over a week now and it is nice. I feel like I am recovering from abroad because while it was the greatest experience of my life, it ran me down. I have been working on tons of music and demoing all the songs that are in the pool for my next release. The hope is that I will be able to take these demos to a studio or a home studio or even a living room of a house (fantasy I have) with proper recording gear. I am writing new songs as well although, I do have a lot of songs, I feel something is missing and I do not have enough. I have never really run into this problem before; however, I am not so sure that it is a problem, just a slight dilemma. This upcoming weekend I am going to Solid Sound. I have said what that is here I am pretty sure, but if I have not, it is Wilco’s music festival at Mass MoCA. I am so excited. This is the first time I am seeing the band since the last Solid Sound festival in 2019. Plus, there are amazing other acts that I am excited to watch and listen to. Oh, and Ron Swanson (Nick Offerman) is doing comedy there.

Grateful Eight

* Wilco. There are many reasons why I am grateful for Wilco, but here is the reason I will share right now. Wilco is coming out with an album on Friday, and premiering it at Solid Sound. The band sent all Solid Sound ticketholders a secret code to download the album early (for free!) to become familiar by the time they play. What other band does this?

* Playoff hockey. Whenever I watch playoffs in any sport, I always think that the given sport is the greatest playoff sport out of the four major ones. Well…I actually do not really think this about the NBA, especially this season. Nonetheless, playoff hockey may mean it when I say it is the greatest playoff sport. Let’s go Rangers!

* The Mets are…good?

* The fact that my basement is not used enough by any other member of my family, so I have been able to turn it into a little bit of a studio.

* Air Conditioning. Saturday was a hot one, wasn’t it?

* Bruce and the band getting out on the road again.

* I wish I did not take advantage of European beer, because let me tell you I am grateful to have had it, and American beer kind of sucks in comparison.

* Henry got groomed, so my allergies have been better. Also, the air filters. Knock on wood!

This Week’s Rare Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Recording: Elderly Woman Behind the Counter in a Small Town (Pearl Jam)

I love Pearl Jam and I am so confused why they get a lot of hate sometimes. The songs are good, the players are good, the singer is good and Mike McCreedy is definitely the best lead guitarist from the grunge era. Sorry Jerry Cantrell, Sorry Kim Thayil. Eddie Vedder and I have a similar vocal range and so I tend to sound good when covering Pearl Jam’s stuff. This is a band I desperately need to see live. I do not have a whole lot to say about this one. However, since you guys are all so swell, I will be posting two more bonus Pearl Jam covers for you guys. It will be on my profile page.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

I am sorry. I know I promised one more European Breaker’s Point newsletter, and for that matter, a newsletter in general last week. I got busy! I mentioned here that I was going to Florence and Rome, and it turns out there is a lot to do in Florence and Rome, even if half of it is eating. It was an amazing trip to cap an amazing semester in Europe, exceeding all of my expectations. We saw everything there was to see in both cities and packed our days to the brim. From Il Duomo to Uffizi to the Tuscan Hills ( where we went on a morning wine tasting excursion…make sure you eat something before you go) to the Vatican, the Forum, St. Peter’s Basilica, Sant’Angelo Castle, it was amazing to see these state of the art landmarks and take in the culture of the country. I was honed in on culture in general throughout my time in Europe. London is a diverse city and very much a melting pot kind of like New York City, where the culture is shaped by the different backgrounds of the people who live there, while Italy was more homogenous as most people were all born in Italy. That lends itself to a strong tribal culture. I found myself having an inexplicable specific feeling in each of the places that I traveled to. I did not realize how much emotional weight that places positively inflict upon you.

Well, now I am back in glorious Montville, NJ and while that is sarcasm, the spring weather has been beautiful since I have been home. It has been aiding in alleviating post-vacation depression. Now that I have had the vacation that I so desperately wished for in my music, it is time to get back to real life. I still need to figure out an internship for this summer, but it seems like that will be taken care of soon. At least, I really really hope so. I also need to find a way to make some money, because you know, that is important. I have some shows coming up that I will tell you guys more about later as the dates get finalized. I am focusing on making demos now for all the new songs that have come out in the last year or so. This is so I can have an idea of what they will sound like and so I can have a roadmap when it comes to teaching the band when we officially record these tracks. It is also so my band can easily learn the songs for the show. I have a lot of new songs, and it may be an undertaking to have my band learn them all, or at least most of them, so I am trying to make it as easy on them as possible. However, I also think some level of spontaneity is fun. It is good to rehearse and get tight as a band, but I have realized that audiences like something that is happening on stage that feels unique to that show or moment. I plan on learning a lot of covers that we can pull out as we feel like it. I always like closing shows with covers for some reason. I guess it is sort of a Bruce effect because he does that…what else is new? Sigh. But, Mnemonic Advice is coming back in a big way. Stay tuned!

Grateful Eight

* The spring weather! The sun is shining!

* Nasal spray. Ok, so I am super allergic to my dog, and I have seasonal allergies and it has created an armageddon in my respiratory system. I consistently have a stuffy nose, but nasal spray is a miracle drug. Three shots in each nostril and I am breathing from my nose beautifully.

* Eye drops. The armageddon is in my eyes too. Sometimes, I feel like I want to itch my eyes off of my face.

* My guitar collection. I brought my telecaster to London because that is my go-to guitar, but now that I am home, I have been having fun playing my other ones because they deserve love too.

* The Rangers! Hockey playoffs are like no other, and the Rangers are such a fun team to watch with all this young talent. Igoooorrrrrrr. Igoooooorrrr.

* Playing shows. I think about playing shows most of every day. I like to form setlists, and then form B setlists, and then C setlists, and then D setlists and choose from there. It is a fun activity. I put so much thought into my live show. I need my audience to match the feeling I get from live music and the best artists in the business of it.

* Real Iced Coffee; none of this “iced americano” b******t. Give me a cold brew. Please and thank you.

* A large shower. You do not understand, our shower in London was like one of those capsule waterslide things; like when you stand in it and then the floor drops from under you. One of these things:

It is impossible to wash without accidentally knocking into the shower handle, thus making the water temperature hot enough to cook pasta.

This Week’s Rare Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Recording: Evelyn

For some reason, the name Evelyn spoke to me. It could be an effect from Jeff Tweedy’s song “Gwendolyn.” It was not an intentional copycat, but chances are it definitely influenced my interest in the name Evelyn. It is a nice little folk ditty. The song is basically about a character that my character in the song grew up with. She used to be beautiful, but the world has kind of dragged her down. She has suffered loss, stress, anxiety, and pressure to do something meaningful with her life. It is sad for my character to see her like this. In seeing her, my character learns that maybe the world has dragged him down just as much, despite not looking like it. I have been interested in the trope of opening your eyes as a vehicle for realization, both self-realization and the realization that maybe the world does not work like you think it does. The trope comes up in a few recent songs that I have written. I tried to have the imagery of what this Evelyn person looks like to tell the story. I have been trying to write with more imagery, that makes the lyrics meaningful but up for interpretation. This recording is from winter break. It features me trying my hand at slide guitar. I have a little work to do there, but it was fun.

“Evelyn”

I thought I saw Evelyn

And I don’t know how long it’s been

Now she’s got hair the color of sand

And a cigarette in her left hand

She used to be so hot and cold

Now rust commands her heart of gold

With picket fence teeth and emerald eyes

And a faded dress as gray as the sky

Evelyn please my darling

Lend me your piece of mind

I know you used to love me

But then you opened up your eyes

Now Evelyn you are so mean

You say it’s ‘cause of things you’ve seen

But things you’ve seen have come and gone

And you just can’t figure out how to move on

Evelyn please my darling

You were the girl of the time

I know you used to love me

But then you opened up your eyes

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This is the last Breaker’s Point that I will be writing in London. That is crazy to me. It has been one of those things where I feel like I have been here my whole life though it feels like this whole semester has absolutely flown by. I am upset to leave this place and for this experience to end. My friends and I call this abroad semester fake life. We will never have free reign of a city like this for three months with this few responsibilities and cares in the world. I feel like I made the most out of it, and I am leaving feeling as I got pretty much everything in that I wanted to. This is not the last Breaker’s Point that I will be writing in Europe though, as next week I will be Italy, taking a train from Florence to Rome. I have always wanted to go to Italy. It has been high up on my bucket list when it comes to traveling and vacationing. It is funny. My last album is called “Need a Vacation”, and boy have I gotten one. My next album might be called, “Need Some Structure.” Anyhow, I cannot wait to see all the sites in Italy and eat some of the greatest food that I will ever eat in my life. Oh, food. It is time to get into the gym when I get back from here.

I visited Abbey Road Studios yesterday. It felt like a rite of passage as not only a music fan but a big Beatles fan. I listened to side one of Abbey Road on the way there and side two on the way back, which of course is the medley; one of my favorite pieces of music ever. You just cannot beat it. You are not allowed to go into the actual studio, but I walked across the road and got my picture taken, explored the Abbey Road shop, and wrote my name on the wall outside of the studio. Maybe it was because I listened to the album on the way there or maybe it is not, but it felt almost spiritual to be there. My religion is Rock and Roll and that was a pilgrimage that I needed to make. Last week’s entry was quite long, so I am going to make it short this week. I hope that’s okay with you.

Grateful Eight

* It bears repeating how grateful I am that I was able to have this experience, and then tack on an Italian vacation at the end. How were your last three months?

* I am grateful for the new friends that I have made here. I now have good friends and those friends are people that I did not know before I came here. Shoutout to all of you.

* Cruel Country. Wilco is coming out with a new double album of 21 songs. They announced that they will be debuting the album live on the first night of their Solid Sound festival. I will be in attendance (geez, another vacation?). It will be cool to be amongst the most diehard Wilco fans and hear this music for the first time.

* Indian Food. Ok, so I always thought Indian food was kind of gross, and maybe where I live in New Jersey it is, but I have had it a couple of times in London including last night and it is unbelievably good. It is spicy as hell and my whole body was on fire afterward, but it is so delicious and so rich in flavor. If you are a foodie like I am and have never tried it, try it! Although, Indian food in London is supposed to be better than Indian food in India. The national dish is Chicken Tikka Masala for god’s sake.

* Shoutout Sam Carus. After a lot of deliberation, I am grateful that he was able to finally make a decision about where he is going to goddamn school. Butler is a perfect fit for him, and he is going to do amazing things.

* The bread here. You are always gonna get some really good bread in London. Sometimes, I take a baguette and make a sausage, peppers, and onion sandwich.

* A great internship. I interned this semester at The Animal Farm; a label services company. I learned a lot and gained a lot of experience on the job. I also had a great boss and great colleagues who I was happy to get to know. I feel a little more ready for real life than I did before this semester, but still not really.

* On that note, one last year to be fully a kid!

This Week’s Rare Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Recording: Everyone’s Chasing a Dream

This song is based on the feeling of longing for something, and not even knowing what it is that you are longing for. I know I and many other people are always looking toward the future. How am I going to get to that place that I really want to go? The escape from mundanity is a popular theme in rock music. This sense of longing often drives me not only to write and record music but work on myself as a person and hold myself to a certain standard. Sometimes I fail, and that is okay; we all do. That is why it is equally important to let bygones be bygones, accept the lessons you learn and move on which this song also addresses. Living in the moment is what is going to help make you and me successful human beings—whatever your idea of success may be. I demoed this song during winter break, but I believe that I wrote it last fall. There is definitely something missing in this arrangement, but I am confident enough in the recording to share with you the track.

Everyone’s Chasing a Dream

Everyone’s chasing a dream

Elusive as the wind

Monday morning coffee, Friday evening gin

Store-bought information

On how to live

Daily planning, a regimen

Everyone’s chasing a dream

To escape the one that they’re in

I just wanna know how to forget, How to not know a thing

Clever people tell you

A recipe for progress

Why do they care?

Do they not have secrets?

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com

Hello, my friends. This is the latest I have ever sat down to write one of these, on a Monday at least. It is 9 pm here in London. Let’s see if this entry to this big public journal I have created changes when the sun goes down. So, Elon Musk bought Twitter today for $44 billion and is making the company private. That is a lot for me to process and I have a lot of thoughts about Elon Musk, what he represents, his belief system, and his politics. I also feel a certain way about the existence of social media and the real and frankly dangerous power that it possesses over our very democracy. With that being said, I am not going to elaborate further right now because for one my brain is kind of fried right now on this Monday evening, but also because I do not want to sound alarmist and this literally just happened an hour or so ago. But, hey, remind me to tell you all about my views on free speech and what it all means to me. I can go on for quite some time. It is only fair to give you all a week to prepare yourselves, so you can come into next week's entry ready.

In other news, I am getting close to the end of the semester here, and it is honestly really bumming me out. I went into this semester not even expecting to have as amazing of a time as I have had. I feel so fortunate. I know should probably be grateful that I got this experience rather than being sad it is over, but sadness is perfectly okay sometimes too. I have changed my perspective on sadness. I used to sometimes resist being sad, or talk myself out of being sad, or talk my friends out of being sad, and generally avoid sadness like the plague. As I creep into adulthood (Jesus F’n Christ), I am realizing that a lot of things in life are sad plain, and simple. Sometimes you may even feel sad for no reason at all. That is the nature of emotions sometimes. If you embrace sadness, it will pass more quickly because there are also a lot of things in life that are happy. I am not a guru nor do I claim any superiority or wisdom or anything, but this is an all-access pass to my brain and it is something I have been working through.

I had a decent Monday though. The Mets won and won at a normal time here in London so I was able to get a good night’s sleep. I am living and dying with this team this season. Whether it lasts or not, they are playing good baseball for the most part and I am going to enjoy it. Let’s keep it going through May, and if they can just play .500 ball in June, I will take it as a win. I paid a nice little visit to Denmark Street today. I am not sure if I have mentioned Denmark Street in Breaker’s Point, but it is a street in London with exclusively guitar shops. It is actual heaven. I walked into a few shops I had not even been in because I like to spend a lot of time in Hank’s (shoutout Hanky boy) which is my favorite. They had some nice Gibson stuff, that I felt comfortable taking off the wall and playing. They have Gibson stuff in Hank’s but if you take one of those babies down off the wall to play, you are going to be met with some resistance—trust me from experience.

Grateful Eight

* Denmark Street. It is a damn utopia mis compadres.

* Better Call Saul. It is back. I watched the first episode of season six, the last season, and I will probably watch episode two a little bit later. Let me tell you, episode one was a great way to open it up. *SLIGHT SPOILERS* There was not a lot of Mike (at least on-screen) or Kim for that matter. I think Lalo needs a spin-off show. Holy s**t, that character is good. Tony Dalton is an amazing actor. What else has he been in?

* Barry. It is back. All my favorite shows are back, but I am not going to watch Barry just yet. I still need to refresh myself on what was happening in the show as now it has been two years since it last aired.

* “What is something that I am grateful for” Ben: “Me.” Ehhh I am not so sure about this one.

* We got a fire lineup tonight with Max Scherzer on the bump. LFGM baby, I will be locked in at 12:45.

* Dishwashers. We have no dishwasher here, so we hand-wash everything. But then, we also do not have paper towels to dry things. I bought a roll twice. It is someone else’s turn. It has been months though.

* Arcade Fire’s first album Funeral. I don’t play it for a while and then I will come back to it and be like “this is an absolute masterpiece; wtf.” It is their debut. It is lunacy to me. The arrangements are complex, the band has a fully-realized sound, and the songwriting sounds like they have been doing it since the 70s. Every time you close your eyes. Ahhhh ahhhh. Every time you close your eyes. Ahhhh Ahhhh. *key change* Every time you close your eyes. Ahhhh Ahhhh.

* A good bolognese sauce.

This Week’s Rare Mnemonic Advice/Josh Carus Recording: Racing in the Street (Bruce Springsteen)

I am so reluctant to cover Bruce, given my feelings towards him which of course are well documented. I feel that I connect with him and his music so deeply that properly covering it feels weird to me. How do I cover a Bruce song and not fall into the trap of singing the song like he has sung it on the recordings I have listened to 3,425,679 times. Growing up, I wanted to be Bruce. I still do in some ways, but that stays between us. However, I am my own artist and although Bruce is my biggest influence, I am Josh Carus. The obsession with Bruce cannot be understated but I will leave it at that. Trust me, you really do not want me to continue. I have had to train myself onstage to not mimic Bruce or his mannerisms that I do not think people understand, ARE NOW ALSO MY MANNERISMS. I have dug myself into an impossibly deep hole. There will always be some Bruce in how I perform, but I do think I am doing a better job these days of just being me. I wear my guitar higher, stand on the side of the stage, use a boom-mic stand instead of a straight one, and do my awkward little dances that have become ever so endearing to my audience. Yikes on that last bit. That was a very John Mayer thing to say. I hate John Mayer. I don’t mind his blues stuff though. Anyway, some of you may realize that I am playing the piano in the recording. Surprise! I do that now! I am not very good at all, but I have learned to accompany myself adequately and sort of fake it. I learned by learning Bruce's songs. This one was a small level-up in terms of difficulty. Look, who cares about all the nonsense of me trying to distance myself from my Bruce influence. It is just not that deep. Racing in the Street is one of the greatest songs ever written, and I wanted to cover it okay?

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit joshcarus.substack.com