Books and Authors

Breaking up is hard to do


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"On the one hand we are proud of the fact that India has one of the lowest rates of divorce, globally. It's about 1.1 percent annually. However, UN reports indicate that the number of divorces has multiplied twofold since the advent of the millennium. Why is this happening? The answers are many and this was the premise for writing this book. 

This book has taught me that education, class, financial independence and status are not necessarily protection against domination and toxic equations. I have tried not to demonise either of the sexes because men and women are not each other's enemies. As the saying goes, a generation was spent empowering women to lead their lives with as much independence and dignity as they could muster. Sadly, we forgot to teach men how to live with these empowered women. It's not as if these men did not wish to do better or did not wish to do right by the women. They did not know how; they did not have the role models. I do have some sympathy for that. Indian women's expectations and aspirations have changed and it's genuinely puzzling to quite a few men. 

Some women do misuse the law but in percentage terms, they are very few. Atrocities against women, cases of violence and dowry continue to be far higher. 

We need to have more conversations on marriage. It's a very private business which affects society at large. Abroad, the top reasons for divorce are finances and infidelity. Here, the top reasons are finances and parental expectations and interference. This book is meant to be a relationship guide with the law as the cornerstone" - Kalyani Sardesai, author, 'When Love is Lost' talks to Manjula Narayan about divorce in contemporary India. 

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