Brilliant Observations

Here'e the thing: if you're not experiencing heightened arousal at the sign of a delicately handled kraft paper bag, are you even alive? Join us, Dear Listener, as we journey down the rabbit hole of birthdays, work-husbandry and the half-life of a vat of Hellmann's.

Oh, Walt. If you could see how they're treating us you'd set fire to Epcot, too. It's Fat Shaming at the Magic Kingdom, Dear Listener, complete with actual weigh-ins and colored wrist bands lest you thought you could escape. Because nothing says vacation like a mandatory weight check before standking for hours in the Orlando sun. Good times. Missy muses about the business upside of hosting fictitious weddings. And Amy takes an unscheduled trip straight to the heart of Mafia Village.

If ever one wondered, Dear Listener, please know that sitting is the opposite of standing. Join us as we explore this and other truths this week while Stuart fights for his life after declaring his intention to "clean out" the garage. (Oh dear.) Missy updates us on her rising Legal Eagle. And Amy inxeplicably launches into a Ted Talk on international spam protocols. As one does. It's a laugh riot per uhuuuussse, sweet ones. So please enjoy. We certainly did!

Cadaver Flight, Chikfil-a Wedding Day and Guess What's Under the Mattress—all this and more, on today's Brilliant Observations! Join us, won't you, as Amy shuns Michael Jackson's musical legacy, welcomes appliance repair folk and resists the allure of the prison fork. Meanwhile, Missy does the research on imbiciles getting married, imbiciles making remakes and, of course, imbiciles doing the research.

Tom Hanks, high maintenance friends and relatable poop talk (is it, though?) are but some of the conversational gems we bring you this week, Dearest Listener. As always, thank you for tuning in, turning on and turning out for us each and every episode. We love you!

She's stealing hearts and smelling farts, Dear Listener, so strap in. We've got another cavalcade of nonsense queued up for you this week, including Birthday Party Trauma, Mrs. Bojangles and (my favorite) Broken Chain of Custody Chicken. Weeeeee!

It's a knock down, drag out, fruit-based fight, Dear Listener, and only one pastry can be the winner. So grab a fork and stick it in your nosy neighbor's ass (because we're done with the niceties this week, also). As always, there's lots to share, lots of laughs, and even more to love. We're so glad you're back.

Easy, Perv. It only sounds gross. This week, we discuss Superbowl highlights, the merits of microaggression and fun with Florida. Look at us, making friends in every state. Gracious.

Oh, Dear Listener, dare we show our age whilst we ask: does no one take advice anymore? It's a conundrum, to be sure, especially when you consider how willling and able we are to dish it out. But alas. These young ones today seem contented to flout our ways. Look at them, with their vacation "registries" and luxuriously nonfunctional fingernails. Tsk tsk. To think? How do they wipe?