Can we have a conversation about intimacy in the church and have it not be...weird?

In this week's episode, I speak with college chaplain Rev. Erin Moniz about her book, Knowing and Being Known. She proves that, yes, we can talk about intimacy in a way that feels approachable, inclusive, and inviting to all without making it awkward. You will love Erin's framework that defines healthy intimacy through the lens of the gospel, differentiating it from economic—what's-in-it-for-me—relationships that ultimately leave people feeling more isolated. This is a hope-filled conversation that elevates the experience of intimacy beyond sex, and will speak to single adults and married couples alike.

Get the full show notes and links here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

Rev. Erin F. Moniz is a deacon in the Anglican Church in North America and Associate Chaplain and Director for Chapel at Baylor University, where she disciples emerging adults and journeys with them toward healthy, gospel-centered relationships. She is a trained conciliator, mediator, and conflict coach. She enjoys content creation, playing music, being outdoors, and narrating the inner monologue of her two cats. She lives in Waco, Texas, with her husband, Michael.

Website | Instagram | Threads

Links & Resources 🔗

• Knowing and Being Known by Erin F Moniz | Amazon | Bookshop
• Alone Together by Sherry Turkel | Amazon | Bookshop
• Households of Faith by Emily McGowan | Amazon | Bookshop
• Episode 018: Recovering from Purity Culture with Dr. Camden Morgante
• Episode 038: Moving from Sexual Shame toward Sacred Play with Sam Jolman
• Episode 042: Safeguarding the Church against Sexism and Abuse with Dr

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Is there a part of you that feels like you’re in trouble, or you're about to be? If so, this episode will help you understand what message those feelings might be telling you.

In my conversation with emotion coach and PhD student Becky Castle Miller, we discuss the differences between feelings, emotions, and trauma responses, as well as practical ways to regulate your body when you're having a flashback. If you’re thinking, "But wait, I can’t trust my emotions…isn't my heart deceitful?" Becky offers a different perspective by examining the life of Jesus that you don’t want to miss. 

Get the full show notes and links here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

Becky Castle Miller is a PhD student at Wheaton College researching a New Testament dissertation about emotions in the Gospel of Luke. She writes and speaks on emotional, mental, and spiritual health in the church and offers emotion coaching. She received her master's in New Testament from Northern Seminary where she wrote a master's thesis on Jesus's emotions. She, her husband, their five kids, and their cat returned to the US in 2020 after living in the Netherlands for eight years, where she served as discipleship director at an international church.

Links & Resources 🔗

Website | Instagram | Substack

• Episode 1: Navigating Toxic Systems and Maintaining Agency with Alison Cook
• Episode 8: Identity and Integrity After Pain and Loss with Steve Carter
• Episode 9: Exploring the Four Landscapes of Attachment with Geoff & Cyd Holsclaw
• Episode 39: Compassionate Awareness and Soft Words for Hard Days with Aundi Kolber
• 13 Steps for Managing Flashbacks from Pete Walker, MA, MFT
• Feelings Wheel
• How We Feel app

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How can we resist the overwhelming loneliness and despair of our time?

In this episode, I speak with author and poet David Gate about his debut collection of poems and essays titled Rebellion of Care. In a world that feels bent on individualism, capitalism, and fundamentalism, he suggests that it’s going to take some rebellion to create a new way of living—a life that’s full of radical care, beauty, and kindness. David shares how to move beyond providing “safe” care to a form of care that requires risk and artistic imagination. He also shares his creative process while writing his book, how the themes of self, community, love, and resilience emerged, and even reads a sneak peek of his poetry you won't want to miss.

Get the full show notes and links here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

David Gate grew up in London before making his way to Belfast, Northern Ireland and Jacksonville, Florida. He now lives in the ancient Appalachian mountains of Asheville, North Carolina, where he writes, mills flour, and tends to a one-acre homestead with his partner and children.

Website | Instagram | Substack

Links & Resources 🔗

• A Rebellion of Care by David Gate | Malaprop’s Bookstore, Asheville, NC | Bookshop
• All Families are Psychotic by Douglas Coupland | Amazon
• Make Sense of Your Story | Bookshop | Amazon

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What happens at church camp? And what happens when what happens at church camp doesn't stay there, but follows us for the rest of our lives?

Most people think of campfires, silly songs, skits, deep talks, and spiritual awakenings. But for many, this is also a place mixed with emotional manipulation, toxic theology, purity culture, exclusion, and abuse.

In this episode, I speak with Cara Meredith, author of Church Camp: Bad Skits, Cry Night, and How White Evangelicalism Betrayed a Generation, about the “both/and” nature of church camps. She unpacks the tactics and theology used for "greater conversion" and other religious baggage people carry from their time at camp. We conclude the conversation by reimagining a camp experience centered on a theology of belovedness, not wickedness—a culture that benefits everyone.

Get the full show notes and links here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

A sought-after speaker, writer, and public theologian, Cara Meredith is the author of Church Camp and The Color of Life. Passionate about issues of justice, race, and privilege, Cara holds a master of theology from Fuller Seminary and is a postulant for Holy Orders in the Episcopal Church.

With a background in education and nonprofit work, she wears more hats than she probably ought, but mostly just enjoys playing with words, a lot. Her writing has been featured in national media outlets such as The Oregonian, The New York Times, The Living Church, The Christian Century, and Baptist News Global, among others. She lives with her family in Oakland, California.

Links & Resources 🔗

Website | Instagram | Threads | Substack

• Episode 16: Christian Nationalism and Finding Hope in the Margins with Andrew Whitehead
• Substack: A Hierarchy of Belovedness

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What is spiritual trauma? How is it different from religious trauma? And what can I do if I, or someone I know, experienced it?

In this episode, we delve into the complexities of spiritual trauma and the healing process. Hillary and I discuss the importance of understanding spirituality, the role of the body in healing, and the challenges of naming traumatic experiences. And, we'll close with a practical exercise as Hillary leads us through a breath practice.

Get the full show notes and links here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

Dr. Hillary McBride is a registered psychologist, a researcher, and podcaster, with expertise that includes trauma, embodiment, psychedelic therapy, and the intersection of spirituality and mental health. Her books include Mothers, Daughters, and Body Image, the bestseller The Wisdom of Your Body: Practices for Embodied Living, and the 2025 release Holy Hurt. She was the senior editor of the textbook Embodiment and Eating Disorders: Theory, Research, Prevention, and Treatment, which was published in 2018.

She has been recognized by the American Psychological Association, and the Canadian Psychological Association for her research and clinical work. In addition to being a teaching faculty at the University of British Columbia, she is an ambassador for Sanctuary Mental Health, and the host of CBC's award winning podcast Other People's Problems. Hillary makes her home in the pacific northwest in British Columbia, Canada.

Website | Instagram | Threads

Links & Resources 🔗

• Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing by Hillary McBride | Amazon | Bookshop
• The Wisdom of Your Body by Hillary McBride | Amazon | Bookshop

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In his Summit session, Christopher Stewart shares his profound journey of faith and life after disability, exploring themes of grief, healing, and the sacredness of the disabled experience. He reads his original psalms, reflecting on his struggles and insights learned from wrestling with God, and emphasizes the importance of processing emotions honestly before God. Christopher also highlights the societal perceptions of disability and the beautiful vocation that can arise from living with a disability.

You will hear Christopher’s story of a sudden and unexpected brain stem injury, and the many implications that have come from this life-changing event. He unpacks what he means by his disability being a vocation, becoming “the least of these” in society, how the disabled can represent Christ in relationships, and invites disabled brothers and sisters—all of us—to explore this idea. Additionally, they discuss dignity and bodily autonomy for the disabled and bring light to the common harm of unwanted prayer or blaming disability on sin.

Get the full show notes and transcript here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨

Christopher was an able-bodied, recently ordained, visual artist and seminary student with a seemingly clear path before him. In July 2022, he survived a life-altering brain injury, which left him with multiple disabilities. In the time since then, through much prayer and processing, he has begun to see his disability as vocation. One of the ways he has been inspired to process his loss and disability is to borrow from the structure and language of the Psalms by composing a series of prayer poems called “Disabled Psalms.” Through his writing, online ministry, and live recitation engagements, he hopes to raise awareness of the disabled experience and to give others in the disabled and able-bodied communities a way to process their own experiences through the intimate language of prayer.

Links & Resources 🔗

Website | Instagram | YouTube | Patreon

Support the show

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We’re getting ready to celebrate one year of the Podcast and start Season 3 next week!

I can’t wait to share these incredible conversations with some of the guests you just heard like Monica DiCristina, Cara Meredith, David Gate, Megan Febuary, Becky Castle Miller, and lots more.

This season, we’re talking about finding ways to name our pain, better ways to read the Bible, working through our stories, learning about our feelings and emotions, learning different ways to parent after growing up in a shame and guilt-ridden evangelical culture, and so much more.

We’re kicking things off next week with Dr. Hillary McBride and talking about her new book, Holy Hurt.

A huge thank you to our listeners who make this show possible through their financial support. You can support our work by becoming a donor today. Just head to brokentobeloved.org/support or click the link to donate in the show notes.

Get the full show notes and all links mentioned here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

Brian Lee is a pastor, coach, and speaker. In his 20+ years of experience in vocational ministry, he experienced three instances of spiritual abuse and toxic leadership. After living with an identity of brokenness for too many years, he learned to recognize and embrace his belovedness.

In 2023, he founded Broken to Beloved, a nonprofit organization that exists to provide practical resources for recovery from and safeguarding against spiritual abuse and religious trauma.

He is a certified Trauma-Informed Coach (Centre for Healing) and holds a certification in Religious Trauma Studies from the Global Center for Religious Research.

Based in Richmond, VA, Brian loves to go on mini-adventures with his family, exploring their neighborhood, community, and city with his family. As a coffee snob and addict, he could always use another cup.

Links & Resources 🔗

Website | Instagram | Substack 

Support the show

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This conversation is from our 2024 Annual Summit.

Get 30% OFF an All Access Pass from any of our Annual Summits now through the end of June. Use code PODCAST30 to take advantage of this offer today!

In this session, Brian, Geoff, and Cyd discuss the concept of embodied faith and the importance of integrating our bodies, emotions, and relationships in our spiritual lives. They explore the different attachment styles, including anxious, avoidant, and disorganized through the metaphor of landscapes and how they impact our relationships and faith.

Exploring the intersection of embodied faith, interpersonal neurobiology, attachment theory, and spiritual formation, Geoff and Cyd also discuss the importance of taking our bodies, emotions, and relationships seriously in the context of church life. They emphasize the integration of scientific research and spiritual practices to foster neuroplasticity and journey towards secure attachment. The goal is to create a church where people can openly share their attachment styles without shame and work towards healing and wholeness together.

Get the full show notes and links here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

Geoff (PhD) is an author of multiple books, affiliate professor of theology at Northern Seminary.

Cyd is an author, spiritual director, and pastor. She is also a trauma-informed, Jesus-centered, integrative coach focused on embodied practices and building a secure attachment to God.

Together, they co-host the Attaching to God podcast, offering a neuroscience-informed spiritual formation and are the co-author of Does God Really Like Me? Discovering the God Who Wants to Be With You.

Links & Resources 🔗

Embodied Faith website

• Geoff website
• Cyd website
• Geoff Twitter/X
• Geoff Facebook 
• Embodied Faith podcast
• Does God Really Like Me?

Support the show

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For the month of June, I'm re-airing some of our favorite episodes. This one originally aired on August 13, 2024.

TW/CW: references to sexual assault

Have you ever had Matthew 18 used against you?

Far too often, the forgiveness passage in Matthew 18:15–17 is weaponized against those who experience hurt and harm. Victims are forced to face their abusers, and there is no real reconciliation. The abuser walks away “forgiven” and restored, and the abused walks away humiliated and put in their place.

Yes, forgiveness is important. And, forgiveness cannot be forced. It must be a freely made choice on our part.

This conversation isn’t about holding on to our offenses, grudges, or dismissing what happened to us. It’s not about releasing our abusers from accountability or letting go of our desire for justice.

It is about the ways forgiveness has been weaponized and abused in the church. It’s about having a truly biblical and scholarly understanding of how those passages are meant to be understood. It’s about protecting ourselves from future manipulation and further abuse.

Join me and New Testament scholar Scot McKnight as we dive deep into the original language and nuance of this passage. Discover what it really says about interpersonal conflict and its role in cases of abuse or an imbalance of power. Learn about the role of repentance as implied in the original Greek, even when it doesn’t show up in our English Bibles.

Get the full show notes, links, and transcript here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

Scot is a New Testament scholar who has written widely on the historical Jesus and Christian spirituality.

Links & Resources 🔗
Website  |  Instagram  |  Twitter

• The Second Testament: A New Testament Translation  Bookshop.org | Amazon
• PIVOT  Bookshop.org | Amazon
• A Church Called TOV  Bookshop.org | Amazon

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This conversation is from our 2024 Annual Summit.

Get 30% OFF an All Access Pass from any of our Annual Summits now through the end of June. Use code PODCAST30 to take advantage of this offer today!

In this session, Suzanne shares her surprise at the number of people willing to talk about trauma and her concern about the misuse of the term. She also highlights the subtle nature of religious manipulation and the need for acceptance and understanding among different denominations, emphasizing the importance of setting boundaries and finding healing in dealing with church antagonists. Suzanne suggests using all three centers of intelligence for productive thinking, feeling, and doing and discusses the significance of therapy and contemplative practice and the value of accountability and discernment through groups and clearness committees.

Get the full show notes and links here. 📄

Guest Spotlight ✨ 

As an internationally recognized Enneagram Master, Suzanne has conducted over 500 Enneagram workshops over the past 30 years to audiences all over the country, and is lovingly referred to as the “Enneagram godmother.”

Suzanne received her B.S. in Social Sciences from Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas where she also completed additional graduate work in the Schools of Sociology and Theology. She has served as a high school professor, the first women’s basketball coach at SMU after Title IX, and as the founding Director of Shared Housing, a social service agency in Dallas.

She hosts The Enneagram Journey podcast and has authored 3 books, including The Road Back to You, The Path Between Us, and The Journey Toward Wholeness. She is also the series editor for an excellent devotional series for each of the nine types.

When she is not on the road teaching and lecturing, Suzanne is at home in Dallas, Texas with her husband Rev. Joseph Stabile, a United Methodist pastor with whom she co-founded Life in the Trinity Ministry and the Micah Center. She is the mother of four children and grandmother of nine.

Links & Resources 🔗

Website | Life in theTrinity Ministry | 

Support the show

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