In Part 2 of my conversation with Rachel Samson and Dr. Jessie Stern, we explore how these patterns play out in relationships and what to do about them.
Why schemas and coping modes develop in childhoodThe classic anxious–avoidant pursue/withdraw loop and why it feels so stuckHow to recognize flooding and use structured breaks that protect both partnersThe difference between boundaries and ultimatums (and why social media gets this wrong)Common attachment myths that keep us feeling broken or stuckWhy deep listening may be the single most powerful skill for every human relationshipWhether you’re in a romantic partnership, parenting, or navigating workplace dynamics, these tools will help you shift from me vs. you into us vs. the problem.
How avoidant partners shut down to self-protect (and how to reconnect)Why anxious partners amplify pursuit (and how to soothe instead)How to make breaks work instead of backfiringWhy healthy relationships do have conflict — but repair fasterFree 7 Steps to Effective Breaks guide: https://www.drkatiestirling.com/download-deescalate-toolFree The 4 Horsemen & Their Antidotes ebook: https://stan.store/drkatiestirling/p/stop-reactive-communication--free-guideProgram: Relationship Reset Bootcamp https://www.drkatiestirling.com/course/relationship-reset🔗 Connect with Rachel & Dr. Jessie
Rachel Samson: @australianpsychologist
Dr. Jessie Stern: @drjessiestern
📖 Get their book Beyond Difficult: https://www.readings.com.au/product/9781923046597/beyond-difficult--jessie-stern-rachel-samson--2025--9781923046597
👩⚕️ Connect with Dr. Katie
Instagram: @drkatiestirling
YouTube: Call Me Katie Podcast
Join Katie’s Online Relationship Reset: https://www.drkatiestirling.com/course/relationship-reset
Website: www.drkatiestirling.com
👉 This is Part 2 of our conversation. Don’t miss Part 1, where we explore how attachment, temperament and neurobiology shape the way we interact in relationships: https://youtu.be/HyqWEyCDorA