
Sign up to save your podcasts
Or


Send us Fan Mail
Host: Robby Bolden
Guest: Trey Hildebrant, Senior Teaching Pastor at First Orlando
How do you know when God is leading you into a new ministry assignment?
In this episode, Robby Bolden sits down with Trey Hildebrant to discuss his transition from eleven years at TwelveStone Church to serving as Senior Teaching Pastor at First Orlando.
Trey shares how he and his wife sought God’s direction through prayer, wise counsel, and honest conversations. He describes the difficulty of leaving a church and team he loved, the importance of his wife’s perspective, and how they found peace while facing the uncertainties of change.
The conversation also explores shared leadership, family priorities, personal spiritual health, and the unexpected discouragement Trey experienced after stepping into his new role.
In This Episode
Discerning when it may be time for a ministry transition
Recognizing the difference between pursuing a calling and escaping frustration
Listening to your spouse throughout the decision
Seeking peace without expecting every detail to be clear
Knowing when to involve current church leadership
Leaving well and honoring meaningful ministry relationships
Building trust through humility, shared leadership, and celebrating others
Protecting personal time with Jesus beyond sermon preparation
Caring for your family during a transition
Addressing discouragement with truth and support from trusted friends
Examining the desire for a larger platform or greater influence
Key Takeaways
Discernment takes time and community.
Trey’s transition involved years of reflection followed by months of conversations. Prayer, his wife’s perspective, and trusted counsel all helped him evaluate the opportunity.
A healthy departure can still be painful.
Trey loved TwelveStone and the people he served alongside. Leaving involved grief and honest conversations, even as the church ultimately celebrated sending him into a new role.
Your identity in Christ needs attention beyond your ministry work.
Trey intentionally reads, prays, and studies outside his sermon preparation. He emphasizes being a follower of Jesus before fulfilling the responsibilities of a pastor.
Discouragement can follow a clear sense of calling.
When self-doubt surfaced, Trey returned to the truths that had guided his decision and reached out to fellow pastors. Their understanding reminded him that he wasn’t alone.
A larger platform cannot provide lasting fulfillment.
Trey encourages pastors to examine their motivations. His relationship with Christ, love for the church, and commitment
Send us Fan Mail
Host: Robby Bolden
Guests: Paul and Niki Speed, Whatever It Takes Ministries
What if the fear of being fully known is keeping you from receiving the support you need? In Part Two, Robby Bolden continues his conversation with Paul and Niki Speed. Niki shares how childhood abuse, rejection, and a deep longing for love shaped her relationships and her understanding of God.
Even while serving in ministry, she carried painful experiences and hidden struggles she was afraid to discuss. Niki describes how a women’s Hope Weekend became a turning point, followed by ongoing coaching and the work of addressing shame and learning to receive love. Paul and Niki also share how their lives came together and explain how Whatever It Takes
Ministries supports men, women, and couples through intensive weekends.
In This Episode
How childhood abuse and abandonment shaped Niki’s sense of worth
Carrying shame and hidden struggles while serving in ministry
The fear that being fully known will lead to rejection
Finding a community where honest conversations were met with care
Niki’s experience at a Hope Weekend and through follow-up coaching
How Paul and Niki’s relationship began
What happens at the ministry’s men’s, women’s, and couples’ intensives
Developing an action plan to put learning into practice
Encouragement for people who feel that change is no longer possible
Key Takeaways
Being known can open the door to support.
Niki feared that sharing her story would cost her love and acceptance. She describes finding people who listened, understood, and continued to care for her.
Shame can persist behind a busy ministry life.
Serving others did not resolve the pain Niki carried. Her story invites pastors to consider whether they have safe relationships where they can speak honestly about their own lives.
Healing takes time and ongoing support.
Niki’s journey included a ministry weekend, continued coaching, and learning to recognize beliefs that shaped how she saw herself and God. Both guests describe growth as an ongoing process.
Practical follow-through matters.
Paul and Niki explain that participants leave their intensives with personal action plans. These may include honest conversations, addressing damaged relationships, and seeking continued support.
Questions to Consider
What am I afraid would happen if someone knew how I’m really doing?
Who can listen to my story with compassion and wisdom?
How have painful experiences shaped what I believe about myself and God?
What is one step I can take toward receiving support?
How can our church become a safer place for people to ask for help?
About Whatever It Takes Ministries
Paul and Niki describe Whatever It Takes Ministries as offering intensive weekends for men, women, and couples. These gatherings include teaching, personal testimonies, opportunities to process what participants are learning, and plans for continued growth. Niki also shares how follow-up coaching supported her own journey.
Care for the Pastor Behind the Ministry
Pastor, you need a place where you can be honest about your struggles and receive care. Care for Pastors provides confidential counseling, coaching, encouragement, and support for pastors and their families.
Visit careforpastors.org and select Get Help to begin a conversation.
Continue the Conversation
If you missed Part One, listen to Paul’s story about secrecy, rebuilding trust, grief, and the beginnings of Whatever It Takes Ministries.
Paul and Niki will return in a future conversation focused on teenagers, pastors’ kids, and helping parents navigate difficult issues with their children.
Listen to Part Two with Paul and Niki Speed wherever you get your podcasts.
Send us Fan Mail
Host: Robby Bolden
Guests: Paul and Niki Speed, Whatever It Takes Ministries
What happens when protecting our image keeps us from asking for help?
In Part One of this two-part conversation, Robby Bolden welcomes Paul and Niki Speed of Whatever It Takes Ministries. Paul shares how he learned to appear spiritually healthy while hiding struggles with pornography—and how years of secrecy damaged his first marriage. He describes the turning point when he told his first wife the truth, accepted responsibility, and committed to doing whatever it took to pursue freedom. Their journey toward healing eventually became a ministry helping others walk through similar struggles. Paul also reflects on losing his first wife to cancer, the questions that grief brought to his faith, and the beginning of the next chapter with Niki.
In This Episode
Growing up in church while feeling unable to be fully known
Early exposure to pornography and the confusion of childhood sexual abuse
The cost of secrecy, dishonesty, and emotional distance in marriage
Taking responsibility without blaming a spouse
The courage to tell the truth when the outcome is uncertain
How sharing their story led to Whatever It Takes Ministries
Navigating grief and questions about God after losing a spouse
Niki’s first impressions of Paul and the ministry
Key Takeaways
Honesty creates an opportunity for change.
Paul describes how hiding kept him isolated. Telling the truth opened the door to accountability, difficult conversations, and the work of rebuilding trust.
Taking responsibility means owning your choices.
Paul recounts rejecting advice that blamed his wife for his behavior. His struggles preceded their marriage, and addressing them required him to accept responsibility.
Trusting God includes facing uncertainty.
Paul could not control how others would respond to his honesty. He shares what it meant to trust God while facing the possible consequences of telling the truth.
Vulnerability can help others seek support. When Paul and his first wife shared their story publicly, other couples began opening up about their own struggles. Those conversations helped lay the foundation for their ministry.
Questions to Consider
Is there a gap between the image I present and what I’m experiencing privately?
Who is a safe, trustworthy person I can speak with honestly?
Where do I need to take responsibility for my choices?
How can I respond with both grace and accountability when someone asks for help?
About the Guests
Paul and Niki Speed serve through Whatever It Takes Ministries, which offers intensives for men, women, and couples. In this episode, Paul shares the personal journey that led to the ministry, and Niki introduces her connection to Paul and his family.
Care for the Pastor Behind the Ministry
If you’re carrying a hidden struggle, marriage difficulties, or grief, you don’t have to face it alone. Care for Pastors provides confidential counseling, coaching, encouragement, and support for pastors and their families.
Visit careforpastors.org and select Get Help to begin a conversation.
Coming in Part Two
Paul and Niki return to continue their story. We’ll hear more from Niki about her own journey and how their lives came together.
Subscribe to the Care for Pastors Podcast so you don’t miss Part Two.
Send us Fan Mail
Host: Robby Bolden
Guest: Brian Daniel, Senior Director of Church Strategy for Lifeway Christian Resources
Pastor, you spend your life helping others grow in their faith—but who’s helping you grow? In this episode, Robby Bolden sits down with Brian Daniel for an honest conversation about personal discipleship, spiritual growth, and cultivating a disciple-making culture in the church.
Drawing from his own journey and decades of experience at Lifeway, Brian shares how mentors and everyday relationships shaped his faith. Together, Robby and Brian explore why pastors need people who encourage and challenge them, how ministry responsibilities can crowd out personal growth, and why becoming more like Christ must remain at the heart of discipleship.
In This Episode
Why discipleship is a lifelong journey, even for experienced ministry leaders
Surrounding yourself with people who model faith, challenge you, and encourage growth
Recognizing the difference between growing in leadership skills and growing in
Christlikeness
Protecting time and space for your own walk with Jesus
Practicing discipleship at home through everyday conversations and prayer
Leading from an active, personal relationship with Christ
Looking beyond attendance and activity for evidence of spiritual maturity
Evaluating whether church programs support disciple-making
Finding encouragement and support when the responsibility of ministry feels
overwhelming
Key Takeaways
Your own discipleship matters.
Pastors need to participate in the journey they invite others to take. Knowledge, experience, and communication skills cannot replace an ongoing walk with Jesus.
Growth happens in relationships.
Trusted mentors and friends help us recognize blind spots, navigate challenges, and respond to God’s work in our lives. Pastors need that community too.
Programs should serve discipleship.
Strategies and resources can help, but the goal is people becoming more like Christ. Healthy relationships, love for one another, and conversations about God’s work offer meaningful signs of growth. You don’t have to carry the responsibility alone. Brian encourages pastors to be honest with themselves and trusted people around them, acknowledge what is difficult, and receive help.
Questions to Consider
Who is helping me grow as a disciple of Jesus?
Is my learning drawing me closer to Christ?
What is God doing in my life right now?
Which ministries in our church are helping people grow—and where do we need to ask harder questions?
Resources Mentioned
Lifeway Research’s State of Discipleship research
Wait Here by Robby Gallaty
Replicate Ministries
Lifeway’s equipping team, led by Chad Higgins
Care for the Pastor Behind the Ministry
You spend so much of your life caring for others, but you need care too. Care for Pastors provides confidential counseling, coaching, encouragement, and support for pastors and their families.
Visit careforpastors.org and select Get Help to connect with someone who can walk alongside you.
Coming Next
Join us next week as we begin a two-part conversation with Paul and Niki Speed of Whatever It Takes Ministries about hidden struggles, honesty, God’s grace, and the hope of healing.
Send us Fan Mail
How can pastors honor the ministry of those who came before them while preparing the church for those who will follow?
In this episode, Robby Bolden talks with Cliff Lea about navigating pastoral transitions with humility, patience, and mutual respect. Cliff shares lessons from following a beloved pastor who served for nearly thirty years, building relationships with an established staff, and embracing the church’s commitment to serving its community.
The conversation also explores the impact of Cliff’s father, Tommy Lea, the needs of a pastor’s family during transition, and how outgoing pastors can encourage their successors while giving them freedom to lead.
In This Episode
00:28 — A father’s lasting influence: How Tommy Lea’s faith and example shaped Cliff’s life and ministry.
04:07 — Following a longtime pastor: Honoring a predecessor and building on the ministry he established.
08:06 — Understanding a church’s identity: Embracing community ministry, missions, and Christian education.
12:49 — Transitioning as a family: How Cliff and his wife, Susie, experienced the move to Leesburg.
15:43 — Earning the staff’s trust: Getting to know an existing team and approaching change patiently.
36:17 — A predecessor’s public encouragement: How Pastor Charles supported Cliff’s leadership and the church’s expansion.
38:27 — Preparing for the next generation: Thinking ahead about retirement, succession, and supporting a future pastor.
43:39 — Input without control: Considering an outgoing pastor’s role in identifying a successor.
45:12 — Remaining in the church after retirement: Practicing humility, respecting boundaries, and giving the new pastor space.
49:39 — Helping a new pastor settle in: Practical ways churches can care for a pastor and his family.
Key Takeaways
Honor the ministry you inherit. Speak well of your predecessor, learn from his experience, and recognize what God has already accomplished through the church.
Understand the church before accepting the call. Cliff’s enthusiasm for community ministry and Christian education helped him embrace First Baptist Leesburg’s established identity.
Build trust through relationships and patience. Take time to understand staff members, their gifts, and their contributions before making changes.
Care for the whole family. A pastor’s spouse and children may adjust at different speeds. Kindness, practical support, and appropriate space can make a meaningful difference.
Prepare to encourage your successor. Healthy transitions require outgoing leaders to release control and incoming leaders to show respect.
Memorable Quotes
“I had the privilege of just trying to build on what the Lord did through him.”
“I want the new guy to feel free to lead … I want him to be able to be himself just like I was able to be myself.”
“Be patient, be generous and kind, help with what you can.”
“Let’s take God seriously but not take ourselves too seriously.”
Next Week
Brian Daniel from Lifeway Christian Resources joins Robby to discuss why pastors need to continue growing as disciples themselves, the relationships that nurture spiritual growth, and how to cultivate a disciple-making culture in the church.
You don’t have to walk through ministry alone. Care for Pastors is here to care for you as you care for others.
Send us Fan Mail
In part two of his conversation with Danny de Armas, Senior Executive Pastor of First Baptist Church of Orlando, host Robby Bolden explores the practices that can either strengthen a ministry’s culture or slowly undermine it.
Danny explains how inconsistent decision-making, anecdotal evaluation, poor communication, and top-down leadership can create confusion and distrust. He also shares how First Orlando gives employees meaningful ownership through cross-functional “VIP teams,” clearly defined staff values, and the freedom to contribute their experience and ideas.
The conversation concludes with an honest discussion about difficult staffing decisions, recognizing misalignment, celebrating progress, and why pastors need safe relationships where they can care for their own souls.
In This Episode
Robby and Danny discuss:
Leadership practices that can damage a staff culture
Why decisions should be consistent, logical, and informed by reliable data
The dangers of allowing the person with the most authority to dominate every decision
Inviting input from employees who work closest to an issue
How cross-functional “VIP teams” create ownership and accountability
Why a team’s solution may be different from—and better than—the leader’s original idea
Becoming value-driven instead of policy-driven
First Orlando’s staff values: change agents, hero makers, team builders, people persons, first followers,
and tone setters
Knowing when to coach, correct, or make a difficult staffing change
How delaying a necessary transition can cause greater pain
Taking time to recognize progress, celebrate the team, and give glory to God
The importance of confidential pastoral care and coaching
Key Takeaways
Shared ownership builds trust. When staff members are invited to help develop solutions, they become participants in the mission rather than people who merely carry out decisions made above them.
Values empower people. Policies cannot anticipate every situation. Shared values give employees a framework for making wise decisions without asking permission at every step.
Misalignment should be addressed with courage and grace. Sometimes separation is the healthiest path for both the employee and the organization. Waiting too long can make an already difficult situation more painful.
Leaders must celebrate progress. Ministry activity can feel frantic while progress appears slow. Looking back helps teams recognize what God has done, thank the people who contributed, and find renewed energy for the work ahead.
Pastors need care too. Danny shares how Care for Pastors has given him a confidential place to lament, pray, process difficult experiences, and receive encouragement for his own spiritual health.
Memorable Quotes
“We don’t do things because the person with the most authority wants us to do them. We do them because they’re the best idea.”
“We want to be value-driven, not policy-driven.”
“Jesus didn’t come looking for leaders. He came looking for followers.”
“Take time to celebrate the wins you accomplish.”
About Danny de Armas
Danny de Armas has served at First Orlando since 2008 and is now its Senior Executive Pastor. He has served on several local and national boards, including the North American Mission Board, the Evangelical Council for Financial Accountability, and Best Christian Workplaces. Danny and his wife, Betsy, have been married for 42 years and have three sons and nine grandchildren.
Resources Mentioned
First Baptist Church of Orlando
Danny de Armas at Best Christian Workplaces
Best Christian Workplaces
Intentional Churches
I Am a Follower by Leonard Sweet
Care for Pastors
Send us Fan Mail
Welcome to Season 4 of the Care for Pastors Podcast!
What does it take to create a church staff culture where people don’t merely work—but genuinely flourish?
In this opening episode of Season 4, host Robby Bolden sits down with Danny de Armas, Senior Executive Pastor of First Baptist Church of Orlando, for an honest conversation about trust, communication, organizational health, and the responsibility leaders carry for the cultures they create.
Danny shares how painful staff feedback at First Orlando became a catalyst for meaningful change. Rather than becoming defensive, leadership chose to listen. Through professionally administered staff surveys, greater transparency, shared decision-making, clearly defined values, and intentional celebration, they began rebuilding trust and creating a healthier staff culture.
In This Episode
Robby and Danny discuss:
How difficult staff feedback exposed distrust and created an opportunity for change
Why leaders must take responsibility for the culture their people experience
How transparency and communication help rebuild organizational trust
Why employee feedback must be followed by visible action
Understanding what it actually feels like to work for you
Hiring people who fit the culture—not simply people with the right skills
Teaching staff when to talk and when to trust
Using cross-functional teams to create shared ownership
Becoming value-driven rather than policy-driven
Knowing when to coach, correct, or make a difficult staffing decision
Why delaying necessary staff changes can ultimately create greater pain
The importance of recognizing progress and celebrating what God has done
Why pastors and ministry leaders need safe, confidential relationships where they can process the pressures of leadership
Key Takeaway
Healthy staff cultures begin with healthy leaders.
Leaders cannot ask for honest feedback and then ignore what they hear. Trust grows when leaders listen humbly, communicate clearly, take responsibility, and demonstrate through their actions that people matter.
Danny also offers an important reminder about Christian leadership: Jesus didn’t first call us to be leaders; He called us to follow Him. Healthy Christian leadership begins with faithfully following Christ and then creating an environment where others can flourish.
Memorable Quotes
“If this is their reality, I have a responsibility to make it better.”
“The bigger an organization and the higher up you go, the harder it is to know what it feels like to be on the opposite side of you.”
“We want to be value-driven, not policy-driven.”
“Jesus didn’t come looking for leaders. He came looking for followers.”
About Danny de Armas
Danny de Armas serves as Senior Executive Pastor of First Baptist Church of Orlando and on the board of Best Christian Workplaces. He brings decades of ministry experience and a passion for developing healthy leaders, flourishing staff teams, and healthy church cultures.
Care for the Pastor Behind the Ministry
Danny also shares how Care for Pastors has provided him with a confidential place to process difficult ministry and leadership experiences.
Pastors spend their lives caring for others—but pastors need a safe place to receive care too. Care for Pastors provides confidential counseling, coaching, encouragement, and support for pastors and their families.
Visit careforpastors.org and select Get Help if you or your family need someone to walk alongside you. Subscribe to the Care for Pastors Podcast and join us for Part 2 of our conversation with Danny de Armas.
Send us Fan Mail
In Part 2 of this powerful conversation, Tami Jackson shares what happened after the truth came out.
As she reflects on decades of marriage, Tami opens up about the complexities of accountability, leadership, and communication within a pastor’s home. She candidly discusses the unintended consequences of performance-based expectations, the challenges of misunderstood submission, and the long-term impact of unresolved patterns in marriage.
Then, in a deeply emotional turn, Tami recounts the sudden and unexpected loss of her husband—and how God met her in the middle of overwhelming grief. Through her story, we see a powerful picture of God’s faithfulness, the importance of spiritual and practical preparation, and the sustaining hope found in Christ.
This episode is a raw and redemptive look at marriage, loss, and the grace of God that carries us through it all.
Key Topics Covered
Key Takeaways
Notable Quotes
Discussion Questions
Resources & Next Steps
Final Encouragement
No marriage is perfect, and no story is without struggle—but God is faithful in every season. Whether you’re walking through healing, hardship, or loss, you can trust that He is working for His glory and your good.
Send us Fan Mail
In this powerful first part of our conversation, Tami Jackson shares the moment that changed everything—a phone call to her husband after ten years of marriage, finally revealing a painful secret she had carried since childhood.
Tami opens up about the impact of sexual abuse, how unprocessed trauma shaped her view of intimacy, and the silent ways it affected her marriage, communication, and relationship with God. Together, we explore the danger of living in hiddenness, the pressure of performance-based faith, and how even well-meaning accountability can become harmful when it lacks grace and understanding.
This episode is a raw and honest look at what happens when pain is buried—and why healing begins with telling the truth.
Key Topics Covered
Key Takeaways
Notable Quotes
Discussion Questions
Resources & Next Steps
Next Episode
What does healing actually look like after the truth comes out?
How do you begin to rebuild trust, intimacy, and a healthy relationship with God?
Join us next week for Part 2 of Tami’s story—where the journey toward healing and restoration continues.
Send us Fan Mail
In this episode of the Care for Pastors Podcast, Robby Bolden sits down with John Harvey to reflect on a lifetime of ministry. With over three decades of experience, John shares an honest and deeply personal look at the challenges, temptations, and triumphs that come with faithfully serving in pastoral leadership.
This is not a polished highlight reel — it’s a real conversation about endurance, failure, growth, and the grace of God that sustains pastors over the long haul.
🔎 In This Episode, We Discuss:
💡 Key Takeaways
❤️ A Word to Pastors
If you’re in a hard season…
If you’re carrying wounds no one else sees…
If you’re questioning whether you can keep going…
This episode is a reminder that you’re not alone.
The road of ministry is long, and it’s often difficult — but it is also deeply meaningful. And as John shares so honestly, despite the hardships, the journey is worth it.
Care for Pastors Podcast — because those who shepherd others need care too.
From the publisher's feed
A podcast designed to encourage pastors and their families with the support they need to persevere and thrive in ministry, ultimately impacting their church and communities for Christ.