Cheerful Despair

Few dared dream that when we began posting podcast episodes that one day we would have posted six and that would be the end of season one - but that event and that day have arrived.

In the final episode of Cheerful Despair, prepare yourselves for:

• Everyone involved to become sad and frustrated with the whole process, to say nothing of their lives
• The Ultimate Slavery Quiz
• A desperate appeal for you to love us

Until we meet again, possibly in a future life, in a parallel universe, don't know where, don't know when, but I know we'll meet again some sunny day, keep on trucking.

DFP.

Welcome to the fifth and second to final episode of season one of the Cheerful Despair podcast. In this episode:

• An extended discussion on the bum hose;
• All the lyrics to Katy Perry songs we know;
• Do you remember the Crazy Frog? I remember the Crazy Frog. I remember the screams;
• One or more Draculas and a Frankenstein and a Herby Goes Bananas;
• I couldn't even tell you if there is a Blue Peter any more;
• Do you remember when I killed myself?

REMEMBER TO RATE THIS BASTARD PODCAST. And none of this four stars or below shit. Get on the iTunes, give it five stars, or I'm going to glue your pets to the ceiling.

Much truck.

DFP.

Welcome to the fourth episode of Cheerful Despair, subtitled "the episode I uploaded without re-listening to". In this episode:

• Things
• Various stuff
• Almost certainly some kind of reference to Hitler and / or time travel

If you enjoy the show, then remember to rate us on those ratings sites they have now. Or just send money.

Please begin trucking.

DFP.

The third episode Cheerful Despair has arrived, this one subtitled "There are just too many things for all of them to be things at once".

In this episode of David Candy and David F Porteous's yet-to-be-award-winning podcast:

• The global conspiracy about vaccines
• Powering through with a mix of Nespresso and Cialis
• For every day that I grew a beard I had less of a home
• E.T. suffered from Stockholm syndrome
• Paranoid and frightened all the time, and very, very needy
• Pandas are useless

Leave comments, rate and - most important of all - subscribe for future episodes.

Do not truck unless it is safe to do so.

DFP.

Welcome to the second episode, subtitled: "If Stephen Hawking could walk, he'd never have got a film made about him."

In this episode:

• The syphilis of Adam Smith
• Governor wanted, must have own wig
• How am I going to build a proper commemoration plaque on my Hitler shrine if I don't know his birthday?
• The golden whores of London

And remember, guys - as I always say - continue to truck, if you have already begun to truck, otherwise do not begin trucking.

DFP

In the inaugural episode of the Cheerful Despair podcast, David Candy and Scottish Author David F Porteous discuss:

• Why chickens taste of nothing
• That df never needs to p
• The evil plans of the World Dryer Corporation

Featuring regular segments Cross Quiz and Debate Bag.