Boomers are dancing in the sun on rollerblades, Houseparty app is destroying lives, doucing for fun is fine. All is well in the world.

I continue on with my ever useful Rankin's 12 Rules For Life with some seemingly obvious yet important rules to live by. I get screwed over by Porn Hub.

Mondays episode pre-lockdown. What wild times we live in. I discover an infinite and untapped source of bullshit gold.

Coming to you live from my sadly deceased friend Jeff's private island in the Caribbean. I speak with northern correspondent James Budd, Big Woj and France Lockdown expert Dimy.

What better way to spend your isolation that smearing a paste of banana and vasoline over your ass to double it's size! 

The apocalypse called, i answered. How fast is a cow? Faster than it looks, no doubt, but how fast does it look? 

Sweet Johnny is for for a romp through the actually state of the retirement home tear up that is the US election. The UK are stocking up on body bags in prep for the apocalypse and maybe TC was to blame all along!

The Hove Thicc Boi is called out for illicit muffin use. Man eats 38 big macs in a row and looks like he is going to die. Anti-PC bus company will crush your ego.

The Sweet One is in for a 2 hour spesh on all your favourite Coronavirus based news stories. We also tackle the issue of why so many spokespeople are so wriggly. 

Todays show is cohosted by a donut that make people have speculated is not real as i chose not to eat it live on air. It never ceases to amaze me the depths the DNBIC will stoop to to try and bring their rivals down.