Complex PTSD Recovery [on Spotify] : We Are Traumatized Motherfuckers

Ever feel "unheard"?

Well, here's the key to getting your point across and sparking collaboration rather than opposition.

Today, we're talking about NonViolent Communication (NVC) - the 4 step framework for communicating effectively about emotions and unmet needs without stimulating defensive reactions or leaning on your own deeply ingrained control tactics... And so much more.

Wanna transcript and some doods to listen along with? Find it here!

Looking to do more than scratch the surface on NonViolent Communication? Check out the new NVC "Collection" as it populates on Patreon! We're wrapping about all the NLP details and recovery implications with whiteboard vids and workbooks, to boot, at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers.

ps - your patronage makes this entire project possible. Thank you, Fuckers.

Cheers

MFJess

So, how do we apologize "the right way"... Rather than creating MORE damage through half-assed "I'm sorrys"?

Today, let's talk about the 5 points for offering a real apology for sake of true relational healing... And four examples of how NOT to apologize, unless you actually want to make the emotional abandonment experience worse for your partner.

Looking for 10 more examples of terrible non-apologies? Hit up the recent episode "Non-Apology Apologies" over at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers. And fuckle up for NonViolent Communication month, coming at ya in September.

For the transcript version of this (and every) episode, go to t-mfrs.com. And do some extra CPTSD learnin while you're there.

Cheers, Fuckers!

MFJess

How DO we heal what's been broken? I've got a short phrase for you - it's what we've all needed to hear all along.

And let's talk about the timeless wounds patched up by real apologies, as we prepare to talk about shitty apologies next time.

Hail yerSelf and Cheers Fuckers.

Git the transcript version of this post at t-mfrs.com and check out some doods while you're there.

Catch up on the recent downpour of episodes over at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers and help this one-human DIY project keep spreading the good news about healing.

We all know about the 4 survival Fs at this point. But how about the additional F reactions- Fronting and Feigning?

Let's talk about learned reactions that keep us feeling safe in relationship... while rotting out the connection, engaging manipulation tactics, and using fear as a self-defense.

Looking for more "real relationship talk"? Well that's the order of the month, over in the private podcast stream. We're dropping four full episodes of "less fluffy" relational conversations, talking about how relationally traumatized partnerships actually tend to shake out... and how to "read them" before you're in too deep.

See you there!

And cheers, Fuckers!

MFJess

We've talked a lot about committing fully to relationships and overcoming our conflicts together, through examining the subconscious wounds that actually underly our relational upsets.

But here's my question: Is that realistic?

Today, we talk about getting clearer on the contents of our potential and current relationship partners' preprogramming, through checking our own somatic experiences, our shared trauma histories, and their adaptions to the social systems that raised them.

For alllll the relationship x CPTSD details that will reframe how you view other people and yourself... hit patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers and join the private conversation around relearning "healthy relating."

Prepare to reflect.

🍻

Ever feel like "the issue" isn't really "the issue" in relational conflict? That's because the real issue is buried under layers of protective instincts that keep us unable to fully connect or communicate... but very capable of fighting, endlessly.

Let's talk about "conscious relationships" and their trauma recovery utility, as we discuss methods for resolving unescapable conflict detailed by IFS couples therapy practitioners.

Hankering for the full details on this relationship recovery talk? Hit up the private community and long-ass episode stream at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers, and git all the extra bonus resources this month at any subscription level!

Then stay tuned for next month, as we get into the "relational real talk" that brings this conversation down to t-earth.

See you there!

MFJess

Why do we start close relationships and love connections feeling one way... only to watch them disintegrate, become survival-based, and turn into "resentment"?

Let's walk through the easiest explanation ever told; pulling in our Internal Family Systems education to discuss the greatest relational obstacle of them all.

Looking for a lot more relational talk? Good news! It's been the theme of 2023 over on the private stream. Check this month's special triple research episode release and get all the extra resources, no matter how you subscribe.

See you there, and cheers, Fuckers!

MFJess

We MFs struggle to begin or maintain healthy relationship dynamics, with a lot of externalized finger pointing about why. "Abusers just flock to me." But the truth is, the abuse recreation is mutual and it all starts in the place we attempt to willfully ignore - inside ourselves, within our preferred and hated personality aspects.

Let's talk about acquisition of conscious and unconscious identities that fuck up our relational attempts equally. The ways Protective, Exiled, and Distractive brain programs inject chaos and abuse into our connections. And why we first need to get vulnerable, intimate, and trusting with our own brains... if we don't want to repetitively create hellish, self-fulfilling abuse prophecies with others.

It's the start of a big discussion going down in the private podcast stream and support community. Support your future relationships and this DIY educational effort at patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers or t-mfrs.com.

And cheers to all yer parts.

MFJess

Why don't we sign up for close connections anymore? Especially after learning about our CPTSD patterns?

And cheers y'all

MFJess

"So how do you feel about relationships? 

Complicated? 

You want them? You despise them? You fear them? You long for them? You try them? You exit them rapidly? Or you try to? You get stuck in them? And haunted by cycles of unfulfillment?"

Today, let's talk about the obstacles we face when considering relationships or landing ourselves in them. The ways we attempt to protect ourselves from them. Why shallow, distanced relationships plague PTSD sufferers. And how vulnerability, intimacy, and trust are necessary foundations for our long-term healing.

For the full conversation on VIT in relationship shitnanigans, hit patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers and stay tuned as we dive deeply into relationships on trauma.