Conversations About Conversations

IS THE PHRASE "I WOULD ARGUE" SOMETHING YOU FIND YOURSELF SAYING? I keep the song I'm a Lover (Not a Fighter) in mind when I find my clients are trying to argue with me. Having gone through crisis situations where my clients needed counsel, like the stock market panic in 2008, I've learned that even though someone can try to argue with me, I don't need to argue with them—it almost never leads to a better relationship and usually weakens it. I firmly believe that two people can disagree without being disagreeable. They can fight for each other (together) instead of fighting with each other over their different points of view and work together toward the satisfaction of their mutual needs and wants. Pointing out differences in the way you view something versus arguing who's right and who's wrong is much more productive. Consider the difference between saying, "What's wrong with what you're saying is _______." versus "What's different about us what each of us believes is _______." You can distinguish between two different points of view without being disparaging. Avoid arguing. Place yourself on the same side of the table as your client. Collaborate and be great. ..... This message is sponsored by the book Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 59 #conversationsaboutconversations

DO THE THING YOU FEAR On this episode of Conversations About Conversations, I discuss the mindsets, strategies and actions necessary to overcome your fears and do things you've never done before. Mark Twain said, "Do the thing you fear and the death of fear is certain." What is it that you've never done before that you would like to do in this coming year? Life is short—even at the longest. Now is the time to get started in the pursuit of your highest goals, dreams and aspirations. Happy New Year. ..... This message is sponsored by the book Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 100 #conversationsaboutconversations

I'M HUMBLED RIGHT NOW When you are used to winning, losing doesn't feel very good. But, losing is good for you because it reminds you that you need to do a better job preparing and planning. Early in my career, I didn't prepare much at all. I didn't have a plan for anything other than a coop­erative client. Because of my lack of preparation, I would routinely have conversations that didn't go as well as they should have. I don't know why I thought I was good enough to wing it, but I did. What about you? Do you enter a conversation with a plan? Or, are you content to improvise and make things up as you go along? ..... This message is sponsored by the book Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 99 #conversationsaboutconversations

GAIN AGREEMENT FOR ACTION Gaining agreement for positive and productive action is essential. If you improve your ability to grow relationships with clients and prospects through powerful conversations, you'll become more valuable to your company, make more money and increase your job satisfaction. There is no skill more important than the ability to be effective in conversations and that starts with gaining agreement: agreeing what the conversation is for, agreeing on the clients' needs, agreeing how to best meet those needs and agreeing on next steps. The best measure your effectiveness is your ability to gain agreement for action in each and every part of a conversation. .... This message is sponsored by the book Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 98 #conversationsaboutconversations

THROW YOUR HAT OVER THE WALL When you throw your hat over the wall, you're COMMITTING to doing something. The idea goes, if your hat is on the other side, and you value your hat, you have no choice, but to get yourself over the wall as well. With the year nearly over, this is the time of year when a lot of people set GOALS for the next year. But, depending on your experience with goal setting in the past, you might be hesitant to set goals for 2020—I know I am. In this episode of Conversations about Conversations, I discuss my feelings about goals. I introduce a few PARADIGMS with which to view goals and provide some ideas for you to become more powerful in your relationship with goal setting. .... This message is sponsored by the book Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 97 #conversationsaboutconversations

THE MUSCLE MEMORY OF SKILL (WAX ON WAX OFF) To become excellent at any skill, you have to put in the time and practice enough to turn the skill into muscle memory. In my 25-year career, I've had roughly 50,000 conversations with clients—that's a lot of repetition. But until 12 years ago, I did not follow a specific conversation model so I wasn't necessarily practicing in a way that would turn me into a champion. Because I approached each conversation differently. I was developing my skills, but not in a deliberate way. I wasn't following a method, framework or process. If you desire to become a champion in your career, there is no skill more important than the ability to be effective in your conversations. ….. This message is brought to you by the book Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 96 #conversationsaboutconversations

I NEEDED TO BUILD RAPPORT FIRST When I started in the business world, I was so serious and objective-oriented I didn't realize the VALUE of taking time to build rapport. I rushed. I often rushed. I put efficiency and getting down to business ahead of building RELATIONSHIPS. But I learned from my MENTOR, that I was making things more difficult than I needed to by not building rapport first. And, because it's not easy to build rapport with everyone (It's typically difficult with 1 or 2 people out of 10), I suggest you go into every conversation with a PLAN for getting rapport—espe­cially with people you've already had difficult conversations with in the past. Building rapport first is a surefire way to make your life and your conversations EASIER. ….. This message is sponsored by the book Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 95 #conversationsaboutconversations

THE GREATEST WAY OF SAYING SOMETHING We've all had the experience of trying to make an important point in a conversation when another person feels compelled to INTERRUPT and talk right over us. I admit I'm guilty of this. Even though I'm committed to LISTENING to my clients and hearing what they have to say, I'm still far from perfect. Listening IS one of the MOST IMPORTANT skills you can develop to be exceptional in your conversations. Good listening helps RETAIN clients, GROW relationships and WIN additional business. Poor listening results in dissatisfied clients, mediocre relationships and lost business opportunity. In this episode of Conversations About Conversations, I discuss the importance of exercising SELF-CONTROL so that you can intentionally create the right BALANCE between listening and talking. ….. READ Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 94 #conversationsaboutconversations

WHEN YOUR COMPANY IS GOING THROUGH A MERGER WATCH this episode of Conversations About Conversations to learn how to handle the objections that you will inevitably hear from your clients when your company is going through a merger. How you respond can be the DIFFERENCE between them staying with your company or leaving for a competitor. Especially in times of change or chaos, RELATIONSHIPS MATTER. ….. READ Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 90 #conversationsaboutconversations

I'M STILL NOT GOOD ENOUGH TO WING IT So, like a pilot, I follow a flight PLAN. How much time do you put into preparing a PLAN for your conversations with clients or prospects? Do you even enter a conversation with a PLAN? Or, are you content to improvise and make things up as you go along? Many relation­ship managers and sales professional are. If you want to be an AVERAGE relationship manager, that's fine, BUT it's not fine if you want to be an EXCELLENT relationship manager. In this episode of Conversations About Conversations, I discuss my ABCDs of planning for a conversation. ….. READ Conversations: How to Manage Your Business Relationships One Conversation at a Time. Available now on Amazon http://a.co/d/7Ruhapu ….. CONTACT: [email protected] Conversations About Conversations – Episode 93 #conversationsaboutconversations