Conversations With Candice

"Who said a mother's love was fundamental? Preach to me, because we are learning together. What if, before they were our mothers, they were just broken girls and women themselves?"

Welcome back to Chapter Two, Episode Five of Conversations with Candice! This season is all about love and relationships, but today we are widening the lens completely. We aren't just talking about romantic partnerships; we are honoring the massive emotional weight of parental wounds, family dynamics, and the grueling, necessary process of saving ourselves.

Candice and co-producer Uncle Bode return to the chamber to answer heavy-hitting questions from the listener inbox. How do you stop letting the ghosts of your past dictate your present, and how do you find comfort in quiet places when you've been conditioned to run on pure chaos?

Inside the Dilemma Inbox today:

• Dilemma 1: A well-known couple of 30 years (with six grown children!) wants to start a podcast about their real marriage struggles but is paralyzed by the fear of public judgment. Candice and Bode break down the core difference between the 'fear of knowing' and the 'fear of judging,' and why you shouldn't roll in the mud with the pigs.
• Dilemma 2 (The Mother Wound): Going 'no-contact' with a mother is the healthiest decision, yet why does peace feel so terrifyingly unfamiliar? Candice digs deep into her own 8-year journey of no-contact, detailing how seeking chaos is actually letting your abuser 'get you twice,' and challenging the societal narrative of 'unconditional maternal love.'
• The 'Lucky Bag' of Life: Rebuilding your identity and self-worth block by block when you were only given the gift of life—nothing more, nothing less.
• Bode’s Take on Universal Approval: Choosing to make moves that let you sleep soundly at night, accepting that not everyone is built to understand or support your path.

No experts, no perfection. Just real conversations about life as we're actually living it.

Join the inner circle on Substack for deep-dive articles, essays, and community discussions:

• Substack Profile: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com

• Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ifcRNeOOcHOgovuhk9i2K?si=6c87234b263c4547

• Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/conversations-with-candice/id1882427274

• Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.co.uk/podcasts/54f972c1-650d-401a-8418-cf499de44b24/conversations-with-candice

• Acast RSS Feed: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/conversations-with-candice

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/candicebrathwaite

• TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@candicebrathwaite

• Produced by: Undeniable Productions
• Executive Produced by: Candice Brathwaite Aboderin and Bode Aboderin

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"I don't want to want things. I need to create space in my head, and not wanting is a way to create space in your head and find peace... If I don't know it exists, it doesn't exist."

Welcome back to Chapter Two, Episode Four of Conversations with Candice! This season is all about love and relationships, but today we are pivoting entirely into our relationship with ourselves, our ambitions, and the toxic, relentless pace of the digital world. Candice is throwing out the cue cards to welcome a true internet pioneer, fashion icon, and accidental founder to the studio: the incredible Freddie Harrel.

For years, Freddie was that girl, the baseline framework for UK fashion blogging, a Pinterest favourite, and one of only 50 Black women globally to raise over $1 million in venture capital to scale her startup hair brand, Rad Swan.

But behind the Vogue headlines and the high-profile retail deals was a high-stakes ecosystem of investor calls, supply chain nightmares, hyperemesis, and an relentless digital pace that her nervous system simply wasn't built to survive.

In this beautifully raw, transparent conversation, Freddie and Candice pull back the curtain on the "Girl Boss" illusion. They dive deep into the reality of Sunday night panic attacks, why your body will always make the final decision when a space no longer serves you, the hidden operational impact of Apple’s iOS 14 privacy updates, and the incredible liberation that comes with hopping off the career train, taking the bus, and choosing mental clarity over public validation.

Inside this episode:

• The "ASOS Freddie" & Blogging Era: Looking back at a time when the internet felt smaller and communities felt real.
• The Venture Capital Toll: What happens holistically to your identity, mental health, and spirit when you scale a public startup.
• Deconditioning from "Productivity": Rewiring your brain to choose being over constant achieving.
• Shedding Outfits for Clicks: Candice shares her personal wardrobe shift and why she stopped dressing for the streets' algorithm.
• The Failed $1M+ Celebrity Deal: Freddie reveals the untold story of signing a massive US star and how she finally found peace when the deal fell through.

No experts, no perfection. Just real conversations about life as we're actually living it.

Join the inner circle on Substack for deep-dive articles, essays, and community discussions:

• Substack Profile: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com

• Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ifcRNeOOcHOgovuhk9i2K?si=6c87234b263c4547

• Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/conversations-with-candice/id1882427274

• Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.co.uk/podcasts/54f972c1-650d-401a-8418-cf499de44b24/conversations-with-candice

• Acast Feed: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/conversations-with-candice

• Freddie Harrel Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/freddieharrel/

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/candicebrathwaite

• TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@candicebrathwaite

• Produced by: Undeniable Productions
• Executive Produced by: Candice Brathwaite Aboderin and Bode Aboderin

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"I'm gonna need you to respect the want like it's a need. The way you need to breathe is the way you need to get to your knitting class. Because as women with busy lives, it's very easy to not respect the want... and when you disrespect the want, one day the want is gonna come down the road and fling your head back and disrespect you."

Welcome back to Episode Three of Chapter Two of Conversations with Candice. This season is all about love and relationships, and let's be completely for real, the listener boxes are absolutely scalping me.

Candice is back on a strict school pick-up time crunch today, but we are holding absolutely nothing back as we unpack four massive, deeply layered listener dilemmas.

From analyzing our own vibrations to refusing early compromise in the dating pool, today we challenge standard societal milestones and talk about what happens when boundaries must stand on business. Co-producer Bode also steps out from behind the monitor to offer an essential patriarchal perspective on dating expectations, financial goalposts, and separating parental duties from relationship breakdowns.

Inside the Dilemma Inbox today:

• Dilemma 1: Should you wait until your life is perfect or you’ve officially "arrived" to start dating? Candice and Bode break down the toxic moving goalposts created by social media timelines.
• Dilemma 2: What does it mean when a nightlife "big dog" plays the perfect partner on date one but hits you with breadcrumbs and slow replies by date three? Unpacking the psychology of early dating compromises.
• Dilemma 3: A 39-year-old neurodivergent mother of three manages the entire emotional and physical workload alone, only for her 50-year-old non-committal partner to claim her independence is a "red flag." Candice issues an emergency reality check, and Bode drops a firm boundary line regarding fatherhood.
• Dilemma 4: Navigating a 40-year marriage when love remains but intimacy is completely dead.

No experts, no perfection. Just real conversations about life as we're actually living it.

Join the inner circle on Substack for deep-dive articles, essays, and community discussions:

• Substack Profile: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com

• Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6ifcRNeOOcHOgovuhk9i2K?si=6c87234b263c4547
• Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/conversations-with-candice/id1882427274
• Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.co.uk/podcasts/54f972c1-650d-401a-8418-cf499de44b24/conversations-with-candice
• Acast Feed: https://feeds.acast.com/public/shows/conversations-with-candice

• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/candicebrathwaite
• TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@candicebrathwaite

• Produced by: Undeniable Productions
• Executive Produced by: Candice Brathwaite Aboderin and Bode Aboderin

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"Respect the want like it's a need. The way you need to breathe is the way you need to get to

your class. Because as women with busy lives, it's very easy to not respect the want... and when

you disrespect the want, one day it’s gonna come down the road and fling your head back and

disrespect you."

Bob’s your uncle if you’ve got an uncle called Bob! Welcome back to Episode Two of Chapter

Two of Conversations with Candice. This season is all about love and relationships, and today

Candice is flying solo in the studio to tackle three incredibly raw, layered, and jaw-dropping

listener dilemmas.

But before unlocking the inbox, today's episode starts with a heavy heart. Candice pays tribute

to the legendary Kanya King OBE, founder of the MOBO Awards, who recently passed away

from colon cancer. In honour of Kanya’s memory, maternal spirit, and legacy, we are shining a

massive light on the life-saving work of Black Women Rising, a charity dedicated to supporting

Black women navigating cancer care. Please see the links below to support, donate, or

volunteer.

Inside the Dilemma Inbox today:

• Dilemma 1: What do you do when you're with an older man who refuses to work a 9-to-5

while you raise three dependent children? Candice breaks down how to slowly, safely pull

your hand out of the lion's mouth.

• Dilemma 2: Unpacking the trauma of a 14-year marriage to a deadbeat, narcissistic ex who

is currently weaponising your children and sending inappropriate messages. We talk about

alignment, vibrations, and setting radical boundaries through third-party communication.

• Dilemma 3: How to completely rediscover your individual identity and independence after 18

years of being solely relationship centred and mother-focused.

No experts, no perfection. Just real conversations about life as we're actually living it.

SUPPORT BLACK WOMEN RISING

Please support the incredible work being done for Black women navigating cancer:

• Website: https://blackwomenrisinguk.org

• Donate or Volunteer: https://blackwomenrisinguk.org/donate

CONNECT WITH CANDICE

Substack (Deep-Dive Articles & Community): https://substack.com/@candicebrathwaite

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/candicebrathwaite

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@candicebrathwaite

PRODUCTION CREDITS

• Produced by: Undeniable Productions

• Executive Produced by: Candice Brathwaite Aboderin and Bode Aboderin

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Welcome back to Chapter Two of Conversations with Candice. We aren't easing you into the theme of love and relationships, we are dropping you straight into the deep end.

This week, Candice is joined by her husband, co-producer, and partner of 14 years, Bode Aboderin for an episode that nearly didn't happen.

Triggered by a powerful listener question about what a "10-year rebuild" actually looks like, Candice and Bode pull back the curtain on the curated edits of social media. They get brutally honest about the financial, mental, and emotional fires that pushed their marriage to absolute quicksand last year. This isn't a fairy tale; it's a raw look at what happens when the scaffolding crumbles, and why choosing each other daily is the hardest, most rewarding work there is.

In this episode, we discuss:

• OOTP (Outfit Of The Pod): Uniqlo basics vs. Issey Miyake statements.
• The 4 Pillars of a Relationship: Balancing parental, business, intimate, and individual selves.
• The Illusion of Stability: Why chasing a perfect balance might be holding you back.
• Masculinity & Sacrifice: Bode opens up about quitting his corporate career for the family business and battling identity loss.
• The "Cliff" Analogy: Are you a strategic risk-analyzer or a "jump and figure it out" operator?
• The Power of Want over Need: Shifting away from the savior complex into true partnership.
• The Vasectomy: Why Bode made the decision for himself, and dealing with family expectations.

Follow Candice across socials @candicebrathwaite. This episode is produced by Undeniable Productions and executive produced by Candice Brathwaite Aboderin and Bode Aboderin.

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's the final episode of chapter one of Conversations with Candice, and what a ride it's been. Before we close this chapter, Candice covers everything from the show's upcoming season break and how you can now join the conversation in Chapter Two, to answering your listener questions live for the very first time.

In this episode, Candice tackles:

• Manifestation - why you probably don't believe in yours yet, and how to fix that
• Friendship trauma - the uncomfortable truth about seeking closure
• The hamster wheel vs. true evolution - and how Candice finally reached contentment

She also reflects on why chapter one was never about transforming in 10 weeks and why the real rebuild takes years, not episodes.

Chapter Two is coming, and the theme is… Love and relationships.! Get ready.

Want to be part of the conversation? Send your questions or voice notes to: [email protected]

Conversations with Candice is produced by Undeniable Productions.

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this penultimate episode of Chapter One, Candice is calling out the one thing keeping you from moving into the life you've been building, perfectionism.

Using the metaphor of a house that's been renovated but never moved into, Candice breaks down why "snagging" (obsessively nitpicking every last detail of your life’s rebuild) is really just procrastination wearing a designer outfit. She shares her own experience - from the early days of this very podcast launching with sound only coming out of one ear, to the nine episodes it took to finally get blackout blinds - as proof that you learn by doing, not by waiting until everything is perfect.

This episode covers:

• Why perfectionism is a safety net, not a standard
• How to know when enough is enough, on your own terms
• The guilt of silence after chaos and why calm feels so foreign
• Practicing completion over perfection
• How to celebrate wins without immediately moving the goalposts

Candice's reminder this week: You don't need to fix your life in order to feel like you deserve to live in it.

Note: After next week's Episode 10, Conversations with Candice is taking a 3–4 week break. Use the time to sit with everything from this chapter and actually move in.

Follow Candice: @candicebrathwaite (never braithwaite) across all socials.

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're almost at the end of Chapter One and this episode is the one you've been building towards. After weeks of laying foundations, clearing out the rubble, and doing the deep internal work, it's finally time to talk about self-expression. What it looks like to actually show up as yourself in the world. Not performing. Not seeking permission. Not dressing for someone else's approval. Just you, fully expressed.

In this episode, Candice breaks down:

• Why knowing yourself and believing in yourself are two very different things
• The real cost of cosplaying as someone you're not (the fee vs. the fine)
• How dressing intentionally can be the fastest shortcut to your highest alignment
• Why self-expression is not about approval it's a statement, not a question
• The difference between "do you like who I am?" and "this is who I am"
• 3 journal prompts to take into the next 7 days

If you've been here since Episode 1, this one's for you. The cocoon is done. It's time to come out.

Conversations with Candice is a series for anyone who's ready to rebuild from the inside out, one honest, unfiltered conversation at a time.

Available on all major podcast platforms

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 7: The Demolition Episode - What You Need to Destroy to Finally Grow

Strap on your hard hat, because this episode of Conversations with Candice is calling in the demolition squad.

We're past the halfway point of this chapter, and after covering a foundations, permission, planning, and structure  it's time to talk about what you need to tear down in order to truly rebuild. Because growth doesn't just need effort. It needs space.

In this episode, Candice gets raw and deeply personal about:

Why most people's lives are designed for survival, not expansion.

The courage it takes to demolish relationships that are holding you back (including parental ones).

Why being a lukewarm bitch is the biggest threat to your glow-up.

The inner enemy you can't demolish and how to beat them anyway.

Why you sometimes must burn a bridge so you can never betray yourself again.

How to stop energetically slumming it and start attracting people who match where you're going.

+ Candice's practical homework to help you identify exactly who you've been vs. who you're destined to become.

This one hits different. Don't say we didn't warn you.

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this raw, unfiltered episode, Candice ditches the cue cards and delivers one of the most powerful episodes yet.

Inspired by pacing her husband through his first 10K in over a decade and her own breakthrough performance, Candice unpacks what it truly means to make your new life watertight.

If you're mid-rebuild and starting to forget how capable you are, this episode is your reminder.

In this episode we cover:

• Why your highest capability and comfort cannot coexist
• How fear uses your own mind to keep you small and how to override it
• The power of your personal data (emotional resilience, lived experience) and why you must trust it
• Why energy leaks; fear, self-doubt and limiting beliefs will destroy your rebuild before it's finished
• The truth about maintaining what you build, not just acquiring it
• How to go to the edge of your capability and discover a version of yourself you won't believe

Key quote: "Safety can be spiritual strangulation."

Enjoyed this episode? Subscribe so you never miss a conversation.

Conversations with Candice is hosted by two-time Sunday Times bestselling author and cultural commentator Candice Brathwaite. New episodes every week.

Get in touch: [email protected]

Listen on Acast: https://shows.acast.com/conversations-with-candice

Watch extended and enhanced paywalled version on substack: https://candicebrathwaite.substack.com/

Follow Candice:

Instagram: @candicebrathwaite

TikTok: @candicebrathwaite

Substack : @candicebrathwaite

If you love the show, please leave a review, it really helps others find us.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.