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*The version that we initially published was dodgy - nowt untoward, but Lily's track blanked out for 15 mins. Maybe you'd prefer it like this? Anyway, this version should be complete. Apols!*

London Kills... a great tagline for our capital city? Possibly not, but not a bad programme as it turns out. 

A body is found under some decking in the garden of a student house in Camden. A STUDENT house. In CAMDEN. With a GARDEN. Forget the murder, this is a mystery that needs investigating. 

The plot trips along at a merry old rate and we have big hair, creeps in suits, murder, betrayal, and some badly built decking. Enjoy! 

You also get to listen in on our process when it comes to selecting what programmes to watch. It is a peek behind the scenes into our ordered and methodical brains, no less. Lucky you.

This episode contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS. 

Our next episode is on "Whitstable Pearl", season two, episode six, "To Those We Love." This is available on "U" in the UK, on Acorn and Prime in the US, and Foxtel and 9Now in Australia. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Lex is in Turkey and Lily is FINE with that. 

Our next episode is on "London Kills" season two, episode one. It is available on BBC Iplayer in the UK, Acorn TV and others in the US, and Binge and Foxtel in Australia. Watch out for those buses. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Better late than never! Apologies for the late episode, the combination of lack of WiFi and the school holidays scuppered us for a few days. But we're here now! In Death Valley! No, not the American one, the one in Wales with all the murders and Dave Coaches from Gavin and Stacey. 

Basically four weddings and not a funeral, but someone who dies because laxative poisoning made their head explode...or something. 

Lex's sound is dodgy on this one but really, it's all relative. 

This episode contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and is, of course, full of SPOILERS.

Our next episode will be on "London Kills", season two episode one. This is available on BBC iPlayer in the UK, and on Acorn TV and Prime elsewhere. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Welcome to Vincent AND TEAM. Because Vincent would be nothing without his team. Well, he would be dead or in prison. And that's what happens when you try and deal with things just using your fists. 

Anyway, it turns out that Lex really likes Ray Winstone, and arterial spray (although not together), and that her first born slept really well as a baby. Lily is also fussy about arterial spray but has no such feelings about Ray Winstone, nor similar memories of her babies. 

We talk about the programme as well. 

Sorry this is a day late. The weather is really hot and Lily went to the beach and then forgot. Soz!

At the time of recording Vincent was available on ITVX in the UK, and on Pluto or Prime in the US. 

This episode contains descriptions of fictionalised violence and, of course, is full of SPOILERS.

Our next episode is on "Death Valley" season one, episode three. This is available on BBC Iplayer in the UK and on Britbox in the US. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Detective Chief Superintendent Christopher Foyle has a crime to solve, and it's in a Funk Hole (brother, check it out now)! It's WWII and there are crimes aplenty, most of them in said funk hole, which is not an underground bar, but an excuse for a hotel putting up those who wish to tap out of the war, and can afford to do so. There are a couple of deaths, some stolen tinned ham, and even accusations of sedition against Foyle himself! 

Tune in now to find out not only what happens, and how Foyle solves it all, but also for details of both Lily and Lex's GCSE and A' level English Literature syllabi, which, for some reason, we cover in quite a lot of detail. 

This episode contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS. 

Our next episode will be on "Vincent", with Ray Winstone and Surane Jones. This is available on ITVX in the UK, and on Prime elsewhere in the world. Season two, episode one. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Trigger warning - there is a LOT of talk of sexual assault in this episode as it is the main theme of the program we are discussing. If you'd rather give this one a swerve, we completely understand and we'll see you again next time. 

Brighton, 2012: Lots of women are attacked in Brighton by a man in a rubber suit, wielding a sex toy. 

Brighton, 2023: The rubber suit man is back, and Roy Grace is out to get him. 

There's a lot to be grossed out by in this episode, and it doesn't help that there's no Sue Johnston to help us through. Lex squeaks with laughter at the idea of an undertaker preparing a dead body, and Lily manages to slander one of the UK's top character actors. We have put both the shambles and the bolic back in shambolic, which is a shame because we actually really liked this one. 

This episode contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, including sexual violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS. 

Our next episode is on Foyle's War, season two, episode four, "The Funk Hole." This is available on ITVX in the UK, and on Acorn TV and PBS in the USA. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Two middle aged women talk about what they're watching on TV and forget a lot of people's names. 

Our next full length episode will be on on 13th June 2025 and will be on "Grace" season three, episode one, "Dead Like You." It's as sinister as it sounds. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Another pheasant shoot, another dead (human) body. Get new interests, people! These shoots aren't safe! This is especially true for the high ranking hobbyists of Westershire police force, ACC Fisher, and Inspector Henry Crabb.  Henry is a chef and a policeman, because why not? He's also not great with cash and manages to lose a wad of it in the opening scenes. Because of this he winds up catering the shoot in question and, naturally, having to investigate the death of the day. 

This is a short episode from us as, once again, time has not been on our side. To be fair though, I think we said all that needs to be said. 

This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and, of course, is full of SPOILERS. 

Our next episode is on "Grace", season three, episode one, "Dead Like You." This is available on ITVX in the UK, and on Prime and Britbox in the US. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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At last! The long awaited Ellis! Channel Five have come good with this one (adverts notwithstanding) as Ellis is not half bad. Sharon D. Clarke is pretty fab, if a bit brooding, in the title role, and the story holds together so long as you don't think about it too much, which, of course, we do.

There are citizen journalists, the most annoying woman in the world, a kid with a drone, a man running round clutching his amputated hand, and an absolutely incompetent murderer. We also discuss how our gen alpha children are an improvement on us, their millennial parents, and it's got nothing to do with avocado toast and posh coffees. 

There's some crazy echoing on the audio which we've tried to remove but you might hear the ghost of Lily while Lex is talking, so apologies for that. 

Oh, and Lex manages to turn herself into Gandalf at one point. 

This podcast contains descriptions of fictionalised violence, and is, of course, full of SPOILERS. 

Our next episode is on "Pie in the Sky", season three, episode two, "Game Pie." This is available for free in the UK on the "U" app on freeview, and on PBS in the USA. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov

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Hey crime drama lovers,

Sorry about the lack of a proper episode this week - Lex has been facing challenges at work that even a team including Jane Tennison, Endeavour Morse, Sherlock Holmes, and Jackson Brodie would struggle to overcome. We will get "Ellis" out to you next week! 

In the meantime, here is Lily rambling on for five minutes. 

Our next episode will be on "Ellis" season one, episode three. This can be found on C5 on demand in the UK, on Apple TV in the US, and on Stan in Australia. 

Original artwork by Mike Luckie
instagram.com/mikeluckieillustration/

Music: Mystery Box by V. Draganov