Okay, real talk — this topic comes up constantly with the women I work with, and I knew I had to dedicate a full episode to it. If you've ever felt like changing jobs would mean losing yourself... this one's for you.

This week, I'm diving deep into career identity fusion — what it is, why so many high-achieving women fall into it (hint: it's not your fault), and what it's actually costing you. Because here's what I want you to know: your career is what you do — it is not who you are. And once you really feel that in your body, not just understand it in your head, everything changes.

I walk you through the telltale signs that you've over-identified with your job, break down how this wiring forms in the first place (hello, childhood conditioning and a culture obsessed with "what do you do?"), and share the four real costs of staying fused — from making good career decisions impossible to keeping you performing instead of actually living.

I also get personal about my own journey — including how I used to tie my entire worth to how ambitious, smart, and hardworking I appeared, and how I finally started untangling that.

And then I give you five practical, concrete steps to start separating your career from your identity — without blowing up your life or your career.If you've been feeling like your worth rises and falls with every performance review, promotion, or project outcome — this episode is for you.

**********Timestamps:

0:00 — Welcome to Cultivate Your Joyful Life
0:54 — Introducing today's topic: How to separate your career from your identity
2:46 — The telltale signs you're over-identifying with your job
4:45 — What is career identity fusion (and how it's different from just loving your work)
10:11 — What the fusion is actually costing you
13:44 — Your career is what you do — your identity is who you are
17:31 — 5 practical tips to start untangling your worth from your title
17:37 — Tip 1: Notice how you introduce yourself
18:39 — Tip 2: Map your identity outside the workplace
19:31 — Tip 3: Invest in something you can't perform or get praised for
23:17 — Tip 4: Get curious about the story you tell yourself
24:58 — Tip 5: Give yourself permission to grieve
24:57 — The payoff: what life looks like when you untangle career identity
29:47 — Thanks for tuning in + free masterclass reminder.

**********

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Free Masterclass — 3 Steps to Getting Clear on Your Next Career Move: https://cultivitae.com/clear

Apply for a Strategy Call — https://cultivitae.com/apply

Learn more about Inner Magic (90-day program): https://cultivitae.com

Follow Emily on social: @cultivitae

**********

YOU MIGHT ALSO LOVE THESE EPISODES:

Ep. 025. The 9 patterns keeping you stuck from your dream life and career
Ep. 028. Why do I feel so stuck?!
Ep. 039. When your job keeps feeling wrong

Okay, real talk — I recorded this episode while sick. Stuffy, congested, the whole thing. But I promised you a new episode every Sunday, and a promise is a promise. So here we are!

This week, I'm breaking down something I see come up again and again with the women I work with: the difference between normal hard and soul-draining hard. Because here's the thing — not all hard is created equal. And if you can't tell the difference, you'll either stay somewhere you should've left long ago, or you'll blow up something that just needed a little more patience.

I walk you through 11 different areas — energy, Sunday scaries, self-talk, growth, identity, tasks, time, wins, relationships, your body, and the big picture — and give you a real, honest T-chart comparison so you can take an honest look at your own situation.

I also get personal. I share what it was like having a toxic boss who made me question my own work ethic (spoiler: I was putting in 40+ hours a week — it was him, not me), and why so many of the women I talk to end up in tears on our discovery calls — not because something's wrong with them, but because they've been powering through soul-draining hard for so long.If you've been feeling like you're losing your spark, questioning your worth, or wondering if you're "the problem" — this episode is for you.

**********

Timestamps:

0:00 — Welcome to Cultivate Your Joyful Life
1:07 — Introducing today's topic: Normal Hard vs. Soul-Draining Hard
2:21 — Why this matters (especially for high-achieving women)
4:35 — The 11 signs: starting with Energy
6:35 — Sunday Scaries: dread vs. normal nerves
7:56 — Self-Talk: "I'll figure it out" vs. "What's wrong with me?"
10:36 — Growth: progress vs. spinning your wheels
15:37 — Time: losing yourself in work vs. watching the clock crawl
16:22 — Wins: meaningful vs. hollow victories
17:19 — Relationships: healthy conflict vs. walking on eggshells
19:07 — Your Body knows before your brain does
20:49 — The Big Picture: the clearest sign of all
22:51 — What to do if you're ready to make a change

**********

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Free Masterclass — 3 Steps to Getting Clear on Your Next Career Move: https://cultivitae.com/clear

Apply for a Strategy Call — https://cultivitae.com/apply

Learn more about Inner Magic (90-day program): https://cultivitae.com

Follow Emily on social: @cultivitae


YOU MIGHT ALSO LOVE THESE EPISODES:
Ep. 025. The 9 patterns keeping you stuck from your dream life and career
Ep. 028. Why do I feel so stuck?!
Ep. 039. When your job keeps feeling wrong

Can't figure out what you want anymore? This one's for you.

I'm Emily Liou, your Certified Life Coach, and in this episode I get real about something so many of us experience but rarely talk about — that nagging feeling of not knowing what you want, even when it comes to the smallest things.

It started with tacos. Seriously. I found myself paralyzed at a Mexican restaurant, second-guessing every single option the server threw at me — and that's when it hit me: if we can't trust ourselves over a taco order, how heavy does that feel when the decision is about your career or your life?

That's exactly what we're unpacking today. If you've been stuck in overthinking, spinning in indecision, or waiting for the "right" answer to appear before you make a move — this episode will help you understand why that's happening and what to do instead.

Spoiler: the answer isn't more certainty. It's curiosity.

Here's what we get into:

0:00 — Welcome to Cultivate Your Joyful Life
0:52 — The taco story that sparked everything (stay with me here)
1:38 — Why indecision is slowly dimming your light
2:28 — The real reason you can't trust your own preferences anymore
3:24 — Why I'm trading certainty for curiosity — and why you should too
4:25 — Clarity doesn't come before the decision — it comes after
7:36 — The reframe that changes everything: stop asking "what should I do" and start asking this instead
8:47 — Free training: 3 Steps to Finally Make Your Next Career Move →
cultivitae.com/clear

********

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Free Masterclass — 3 Steps to Getting Clear on Your Next Career Move: https://cultivitae.com/clear

Learn more about Inner Magic (90-day program): https://cultivitae.com

Follow Emily on social: @cultivitae

YOU MIGHT ALSO LOVE THESE EPISODES:
Ep. 025. The 9 patterns keeping you stuck from your dream life and career
Ep. 028. Why do I feel so stuck?!
Ep. 039. When your job keeps feeling wrong

Have you ever wanted to do something — send the application, pitch yourself for the promotion, launch the side project — but no matter how hard you try, you just… can't? You're not lazy. You're not broken. And you're definitely not alone.

That's exactly what this episode is about, and honestly, it's one I've been wanting to record for a while because I don't think enough people are talking about what's actually going on beneath the surface.

Here's what you'll get out of this one: a real understanding of why motivation and willpower aren't the problem — your nervous system is — and a simple, practical framework you can start using today to get unstuck without the guilt spiral.

********

Listen in as we cover:

0:00 – Welcome & what this episode is really about
0:54 – Why I don't believe anyone is inherently lazy or unmotivated
2:06 – It all starts with your state of being (this one is *huge*)
3:37 – How we can shift our state in literal nanoseconds
4:16 – What most career coaches aren't talking about — but should be
8:30 – Real client story: the "chronic freezer" who couldn't hit submit
13:47 – Why knowing what to do isn't enough (the gas + brake pedal metaphor)
16:37 – Getting back into your window of tolerance
18:01 – Step 1 of the 3-part exercise: Name what you're actually feeling
19:10 – Step 3: Ask yourself "what would feel like a relief right now?"
23:23 – Resources, Inner Magic, and how to work with me

********

RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Free Masterclass — 3 Steps to Getting Clear on Your Next Career Move: https://cultivitae.com/clear

Learn more about Inner Magic (90-day program): https://cultivitae.com

Follow Emily on social: @cultivitae

YOU MIGHT ALSO LOVE THESE EPISODES:
Ep. 008: I Hate my Job but I Can’t Quit w/ Megan Myers
Ep. 025. The 9 patterns keeping you stuck from your dream life and career
Ep. 028. Why do I feel so stuck?!

In this episode, I'm diving deep into something I've been seeing over and over again in my strategy calls with incredible women—the "Ideas Graveyard." You know what I'm talking about, right? Those dreams and ideas that excite us for a moment... and then somehow end up buried under excuses, fear, and self-doubt.

I recently wrapped up my 13th one-on-one call, and I've been talking to women from different industries, different cities, with totally different surface-level problems. But here's what struck me: underneath it all, they're all saying the same thing. They're playing small. They KNOW they're capable of more, but something keeps holding them back from reaching for it.Sound familiar?

If you've ever felt stuck between "this is fine" and "I know I'm meant for more," this episode is for you. I'm getting real about the three sneaky excuses that keep us from resurrecting those ideas that keep whispering to us—and more importantly, I'm sharing a practical framework to actually get started.

Whether you're the chief scientist who won't send out her portfolio, the marketing manager stuck on choosing a website name, or the high-achiever who keeps waiting for the "perfect time"—I see you, and I'm here to help you break through.

Listen in as we explore:

0:00 Why I'm on a mission to help you stop playing small

2:42 The "Ideas Graveyard" vs. the Ideas Parking Lot—and why it matters

6:48 Why credentials and certifications won't save you (a hard truth about coaching programs)

11:26 The three common excuses holding you back from playing bigger

11:37 Excuse #1: "I don't know what I want" (spoiler: yes you do)

14:13 Excuse #2: "I'm not ready yet" (and why perfect timing is an illusion)

16:57 Excuse #3: The hidden cost of your "safe" job

21:46 A practical framework to get on the committed path (and finally DO the thing)

28:00 How to join me for a strategy call (if you're ready for support)

********

This episode is for the smart, ambitious woman who's tired of watching her dreams collect dust. Let's resurrect that one idea that keeps coming back to you—because it's coming back for a reason.


RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

Free Strategy Call - I'm opening up my calendar this month for one-on-one strategy calls. No obligation, no pressure—just a chance for me to hear what's going on in your career and give you personalized guidance on your next steps. Apply at: cultivateyourcareer.com/apply

FREE Live Masterclass - Join me for my brand-new 3-shift framework training. After coaching over 500 women, I've distilled the exact three steps you need to take (in a very specific order) to trust yourself again and get clarity on what's next in your career. Register at: cultivateyourcareer.com/clear
RELATED EPISODES:
Ep. 008: I Hate my Job but I Can’t Quit w/ Megan Myers
Ep. 028. Why do I feel so stuck?!Ep. 036. Why I quit a million dollar program

Hey friend! So here's a question I need to ask you: Are you job hugging?

Yeah, I know—everything needs a catchy phrase these days, right? But this one actually describes something real that over half of us are dealing with right now. According to a recent CNBC survey, 57% of people are staying in jobs they don't love, not because they're satisfied, but because they're scared. Scared of layoffs, economic uncertainty, or the cooling job market.
If that's you, I want you to know: I get it. I've been there. And in this episode, I'm breaking down exactly what job hugging is, why so many of us are doing it, and most importantly—how to address it and move forward with intention instead of fear.

Why You Should Tune In:

Whether you're thinking about leaving your job or recommitting to staying, this episode will help you get unstuck. I'm sharing practical strategies for both paths, plus some deeply personal stories from my own career (including the toxic boss who accidentally pushed me to start my own business). This isn't about what you should do—it's about helping you make a grounded decision that actually feels right for YOU.
What We're Covering:0:54 – The big question: Are you job hugging?

1:13 – What job hugging actually is (and why it's the opposite of job hopping)

2:13 – The real reasons we cling to jobs: AI fears, inflation, imposter syndrome

4:13 – Pivotal shift: How to address it (this is where we get practical)

4:15 – The "two feet planted" framework: Stop straddling and make a decision

6:58 – For those leaving: Crafting your exit strategy (and why progress = happiness)

10:57 – For those staying: How to make your current job 1% more exciting

14:29 – Personal story: My staffing agency job and why I stayed 3 years

17:29 – When to RUN: Toxic, unethical, and abusive situations

19:23 – Your reminder: Everything you want is on the other side of fear

The Bottom Line:
Job hugging isn't inherently bad—what's causing you stress is the indecision. The constant one-foot-in, one-foot-out seesaw that makes you lose trust in yourself. In this episode, I'm helping you plant both feet somewhere—whether that's committing to stay and thrive, or committing to leave with a clear plan.
Because here's what I know for sure: the relief doesn't come from being at the finish line. It comes from knowing you have a plan and you're making progress.
Ready to stop hugging and start deciding? Let's dive in.

Learn how to work with me.

Oh my goodness, I'm SO excited you're here! This episode is a little different—and honestly, it's exactly what I needed to share with you right now.

If you've been wondering where I've been (spoiler: I haven't abandoned you!), I'm opening up about the real, messy behind-the-scenes of building a business while staying true to your mission. And then, I'm sharing an incredibly timely conversation I had with Irina Posan from the Career Cravings Podcast about something I think you might be experiencing too: that nagging feeling that your "good on paper" job just isn't... right.You know that whisper inside that keeps saying something needs to change? The one you're trying to ignore because, logically, everything looks fine from the outside? Yeah, we're talking about THAT.

In this episode, Irena and I dive deep into misalignment, burnout, the signs I personally ignored for way too long, and how I finally found my way back into alignment. If you're feeling stuck, unfulfilled, or like you're living someone else's version of success, this conversation is going to hit home.

I'm sharing vulnerably about my own journey—the good, the hard, and the messy middle—because I want you to know you're not alone in this. And more importantly, I want you to know there IS a way forward.

********Here's what we're covering:

00:52 - Welcome Back: Why the podcast went quiet (and why I'm back for good!)

01:15 - The honest truth about my start-stop journey with this show

01:36 - What I've been building behind the scenes in Inner Magic

02:09 - The hardest lesson about entrepreneurship: figuring out what actually matters

02:21 - Why I had to pause the podcast (and what changed this week)

03:46 - The interview that reminded me why I love this work

48:14 - My reflections after the interview and what resonated most

48:39 - Your next step: Join my free live masterclass on the 3-shift
framework

49:11 - Why life is too short to dread Mondays (and what to do about it)

********
RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:

FREE Live Masterclass - Join me for my brand-new 3-shift framework training. After coaching over 500 women, I've distilled the exact three steps you need to take (in a very specific order) to trust yourself again and get clarity on what's next in your career. Register at: cultivateyourcareer.com/clear

Free Strategy Call - I'm opening up my calendar this month for one-on-one strategy calls. No obligation, no pressure—just a chance for me to hear what's going on in your career and give you personalized guidance on your next steps. Apply at: cultivateyourcareer.com/apply
MORE ABOUT IRINA POSAN:

Irina is the host of the Career Cravings Podcast and an incredible HR career strategist. If you're looking to land your dream HR role and need expert guidance with your job search, definitely check out her work in her website.

RELATED EPISODES:
Ep. 008: I Hate my Job but I Can’t Quit w/ Megan Myers
Ep. 028. Why do I feel so stuck?!Ep. 036. Why I quit a million dollar program

In this episode, I dive into an 'Am I the Asshole' post that's been on my mind. The story revolves around a job interview gone awry, where an interviewer tells a candidate to 'shut up and listen.' I explore this event from a compassionate coaching perspective, shedding light on human psychology, nervous system regulation, and the importance of effective communication.

We discuss how stress and pressure can disrupt our behavior, the concept of the window of tolerance, and how both the candidate and interviewer could have handled the situation better. Tune in to uncover valuable insights on maintaining professionalism and improving your interactions in high-stress situations.

********

TIME STAMPS:

00:00 The Job Interview Gone Wrong01:23 Welcome Back to the Channel02:30 The Interview Breakdown05:05 Understanding the Window of Tolerance08:40 The Candidate's Perspective09:25 The Interviewer's Perspective12:23 The Importance of Nervous System Regulation15:42 Final Thoughts and Viewer Comments19:23 Conclusion and Next Steps
********

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more & sign up for the Inner Magic waitlist
FREE 33-page 9 Patterns Keeping you stuck assessment/PDF Download

RELATED EPISODES:
Ep. 017. Making deeper friendships as an adult
Ep. 023. How people pleasing bit me in the ass!Ep. 035. Why starting from 0 is a BIG lie

Leave me a comment on our blog

In this episode, I dive deep into the concept of misalignment burnout, a unique form of exhaustion stemming from a disconnect between your values, desires, and your current way of life. I'll share personal stories, including a vulnerable account of my own experience with misalignment in a five-year relationship, and illustrate how this type of burnout is a slow, insidious process.

We’ll discuss common patterns that keep us stuck, like people-pleasing and perfectionism, and how millennials, in particular, face unique challenges from societal expectations. I’ll introduce you to practical steps for recognizing misalignment in your life and exploring your true desires, plus techniques like shadow work to reintegrate disowned parts of yourself. Join me as we navigate this everyday struggle and find a path back to alignment and fulfillment.

********

TIME STAMPS:

00:00 Embracing Change: Permission to Evolve01:25 Understanding Misalignment Burnout02:24 Personal Story: Experiencing Misalignment09:19 Patterns of Misalignment: People Pleasing and Perfectionism11:59 Shadow Work: Embracing Hidden Parts14:58 Living from the Heart: Aligning with True Desires18:53 Taking Action: Steps to Realign Your Life21:10 Conclusion: Embrace Your True Self
********

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more & sign up for the Inner Magic waitlist
FREE 33-page 9 Patterns Keeping you stuck assessment/PDF Download

RELATED EPISODES:
Ep. 022. Career Burnout AND Motherhood Burnout?! w/ Lydia Fogo Johnson
Ep. 023. How people pleasing bit me in the ass!Ep. 028. Why do I feel so stuck?!

Leave me a comment on our blog

In this debut episode, I, Emily Liou, Certified Misalignment Burnout Coach, explain my soul purpose and mission to evolve from a known job search coach to a Misalignment Burnout coach. Listen in as I delve into why I’m so freaking excited to share how you can cultivate your own joyful life.


For the past 6+ years, I've been helping people land their dream jobs without applying online. I’ve made a name for myself as a “LinkedIn Top 10 Voice” to follow in job search and career, and I’m recognized for having one of the top career-coaching programs. 


But, as you’ll learn in this episode, we are whole beings, and I’ve been feeling out of alignment with myself to not support your beautiful soul with everything that relates to inside and outside of your career.


Together, we’ll go on a journey of how you can come back to your whole self – your true authentic self, the self that loves and approves of yourself – no matter what you have on the exterior or what others say or think.

********

TIME STAMPS:

00:00 Welcome to the Journey: Discovering Your Why00:41 Introducing Cultivate Your Joyful Life01:33 The Personal Story Behind the Podcast02:11 Transitioning from Career Coach to Life Coach03:16 The Essence of Cultivating a Joyful Life08:13 Unveiling the Wheel of Life: A Guide to Fulfillment09:46 Your First Actionable Exercise: The Wheel of Life11:47 Gratitude and Next Steps
********

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more & sign up for the Inner Magic waitlist
FREE 33-page 9 Patterns Keeping you stuck assessment/PDF Download

RELATED EPISODES:
Ep. 003: How to Find Your Life Purpose w/ Rachel East
Ep. 015: How to Pursue Your BIG DreamsEp. 025: The 9 patterns keeping you stuck from your dream life and career
Leave me a comment on our blog