Cultural Threeway

The Bitches have the cardigan flag flying at full-mast as the Miss America and the Heartbreak kid bring the United States one step closer to a monarchy. Daniel is standing on the edge of vacation and is ready for a break, including from being a responsible adult. A cultured adult he will be, but not a responsible one. Max is also over the wave of responsibility that has washed over him and even his beloved running has now become about dodging U.S. troops. Then the Besties discuss the cultural reaction to Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’ iconic engagement. If you’re angry about it being news, then that’s a reaction and you’re now part of culture (SORRY NOT SORRY). They’d raise their Pumpkin Spice Lattes but it’s still a bit too early for that. Cheers!

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The Bitches can be bitches before a cookie, and they certainly can after, but while eating one? You’ll have to listen to find out. Daniel swallows his anger at Taylor Swift having the audacity to overshadow Meghan Markle’s big announcement about the second season of a television show where she repackages Taylor’s baked goods. Max enters the spirit of pre pre Fall by turning up to pool pirates with baked goods; his starter is bubbling, the muffins rising and the cookies are gagged and gooey. Then the Besties find their beautiful podcast invaded by the topic that they try so hard to avoid… politics. As the streets of DC get trampled by federal agents we discuss the cultural impact it will have on an already fragile city. Cheers!

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Lights. Camera. Sparkle. The Bitches are finally entering their Showgirl era, it’s the moment you all knew was coming. Probably not the finale to the job hunt saga that you expected, but we love to keep you on your toes. Daniel spent last weekend ghosting his bestie, it was like he was a phantom. Has he been taking Broadway’s hottest ticket, Masquerade, a little too literally? Well, obsession is the name of the game. Max enters his Top energy (no pun intended) by listening to a sports podcast and emerges inspired and motivated… to explore sour dough bread. Is it the starter he needs? And then the Besties push aside summer (sorry Dwayne, but you looked adorable on the beach) and think ahead to the release of Taylor Swift’s new album. They have plenty to say with very little information. But one thing is clear, they shall be reclaiming orange this Fall. Cheers!

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The Bitches are works of art, they should be on display in galleries, not just wandering about them. Thank goodness the culture now is allowing them to talk crap for an hour because they have too many opinions for under three minutes. Daniel’s week has literally hit the headlines but when are the headlines going to be about him? Maybe he needs to become a writer and head to New York looking for love… oh wait, we've seen this storyline before! How does it all end? Max picks his eyes off the floor after seeing another gay drink the Koolaid. Red dye No 30 anyone? Can’t people be more original? Oh look, a remake of The Holiday! Then the Besties are forced to be actual adults and discuss discussions of actual consequence, like what the hell happened in the Marks and Spencer’s bra department? And can Sydney Sweeney’s career ever recover from a thumbs up from the Right, because Nancy Meyers would never! Cheers!

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The Bitches are reaching for their cardigans as summer takes a pause and we are plunged into a False Fall, otherwise known as Taylor Swift season. Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the farmers market. Daniel has returned surprisingly refreshed from his trip to Florida, full of tips and tricks about dealing with slightly difficult family members. And no, it doesn’t include feeding them to alligators. Max is now the wife of a famous rock star and enjoys turning five star restaurants into all you can eat buffets. Just don’t ask his opinion, he is a Trad-Wife afterall. The Besties discuss the Hollywood couples that are making us believe in a thing called love, and no, we’re not talking about the nightmare that is Together. We’re talking about the couple we never saw coming and totally shipping Pammy-A and Liam Neeson. Do we discuss the size of his Naked Gun? Cheers!

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Bitches With Beards Episode 129: Midsummer Night’s Dream Girls! by Daniel and Max

Is it a bitch? Is it a plane? No, it’s Chris F**king Martin! Faster than a speeding bullet, culture cultured so quickly it was a fricking Go-gurt. Daniel sees the return of a pussy named Karma and chooses to fight the oligarchy by turning a blind eye. If they need help then they have Chat GPT. Max finally gets his taste of summer as he leaves the cinema and actually has a real experience… even if the coconuts are fake. Then the Besties pick themselves off the floor as they get their heads around Coldplay being back in the culture. The internet is a cruel mistress and has not turned a blind eye to the shenanigans of a certain CEO and quite frankly we’re here for it. And it’s Gwynnie P adjacent! Cheers!

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The Bitches are giddy with joy as they find themselves in the middle of a culture war, there are heroes on both sides… only joking, we’re the good guys, nuff sed! But seriously, when is too soon to start mocking the fallen? Daniel comes to the reincarnation of Princess Margaret, at least that would explain his luck with men. Does this angel have to meet every devil in DC? Max plays it safe and spends the week in the cinema, enjoying the company of redeemed robots, dancing accountants and aliens protecting the American dream. Hey buddy, eyes up here, on the silver screen. Then the Besties discuss the new reiteration of Superman that has hit theaters and explore why people are only just realizing that a character almost a century old has the values that we should be aspiring to. As the planet enters its Supervillain era will their henchmen finally realize they have the power to send them packing?

question whether or not 2025 craziness was written in the stars and, as we hit the halfway point of the year, are we able to start getting things back to close to normal… ish? Cheers!

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The Bitches are coming to you live from July 4th and it may surprise you that they are feeling a bit MEH about the whole thing. Hopefully a good old catchup will do them some good, it’s just a damn pity everything is so quiet… until DC turns into a warzone. Daniel is bracing himself for a trip to visit his mother and his bestie is here for him… to take plenty of notes because this is going to be delicious content. Max is slowly feeling himself come back to life on a professional level but that doesn’t mean he can’t still be the perfect host, graciously asking his guests to GTFO! Then the Besties question whether or not 2025 craziness was written in the stars and, as we hit the halfway point of the year, are we able to start getting things back to close to normal… ish? Cheers!

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The Bitches are back in your ears so finish your conversations and silence your phones… unless you're telling people about the podcast and listening to us on your phones. Mothers, hide your daughters, Daniel is hot, sweaty and when it comes to removing clothes the limit does not exist. Luckily he found his dignity when it came to handling Lady Bird Johnson’s personal… correspondence. Max may be celebrating ten years since getting engaged but that doesn’t stop him getting ghosted by professional contacts. Oda Mae, we need you girl for these job applications. Then the Besties question why it is that manners and common sense don’t seem to travel well. They promise to be perfect guests… if their budgets ever stretch beyond a DC pool party. Cheers!

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