Dad to Dads Podcast

Interview with Zach Clinton, motivational speaker, author, Vice President of Association of Christian Counselors and President of Ignite Men's Impact Weekend. In this episode Robert and Zach discuss fatherhood from a Biblical perspective. They emphasize the importance of a father's presence in a child's life and the positive impact it has on their mental health, academic performance, and identity development. They also discuss the role of vulnerability and emotional openness in fatherhood, highlighting the need for fathers to model these behaviors for their children. Zach emphasizes the significance of investing in children and providing them with the necessary ingredients for resilience. He encourages fathers to prioritize their families and be consistent in their presence and support. The conversation focuses on the power of words and the importance of creating a positive environment within the home. It emphasizes the role of fathers in shaping their children's lives through their words and actions. The conversation also touches on the topics of discipline, boundaries, and the challenges faced by dads today, including pressure, past mistakes, and the impact of technology. It concludes with a discussion on forgiveness and the importance of choosing to forgive, both others and oneself.

Takeaways

• A father's presence in a child's life has a significant impact on their mental health, academic performance, and identity development.
• Fathers should model vulnerability and emotional openness for their children, creating a safe space for them to express and explore their emotions.
• Investing in children and providing them with the necessary ingredients for resilience is crucial for their growth and development.
• Prioritizing family and being consistent in presence and support are essential responsibilities of fathers. Words have the power to create a world of hurt or a world of hope and healing.
• Fathers need to reflect on the world they are creating within their homes and strive to create a positive and uplifting environment.
• Discipline is not about going easy on kids, but about pushing them to reach their full potential with love and accountability.
• Dads should strive to be both a friend and a parent to their children, setting boundaries while also fostering a strong relationship.
• The prevalence of technology, especially smartphones and pornography, poses challenges for dads in maintaining healthy relationships and setting a good example.
• Forgiveness is a commandment and a choice that brings freedom and healing, both for oneself and for others.
• Forgiveness does not mean excusing or forgetting the wrongs done, but it allows for personal growth and the possibility of reconciliation.
• Living an 'even if' mindset, choosing faith and endurance in the face of challenges, can lead to a transformed life.

Send us Fan Mail

Robert interviews Jeff Nelligan, author of 'Four Lessons from My Three Sons: How You Can Raise Resilient Sons.' Jeff shares his background and the inspiration behind writing the book. They discuss the importance of resilience and the challenges faced by the current generation. They also touch on topics such as participation trophies, the impact of screens on children, and the value of being early. The four lessons from the book are guiding personal conduct, developing confidence, fostering resilience, and creating resilient kids through hard truths. The conversation discusses the importance of setting goals, holding oneself accountable, and breaking down goals into manageable steps. It emphasizes the need for parents to be actively involved in their children's lives and provide guidance and support. The concept of the 'jackass kid' is introduced, referring to self-obsessed and attention-seeking behaviors that parents should discourage. The impact of COVID-19 on children's physical and mental health is also discussed, highlighting the need for parents to help their children stay active and engaged during challenging times.

Takeaways

• Resilience is the capacity to withstand or recover quickly from difficulties.
• Parents play a crucial role in raising resilient children.
• The current generation faces challenges such as living at home longer and excessive screen time.
• Accomplishments and performance are rewarded and respected in the world.
• Teaching personal conduct, developing confidence, fostering resilience, and embracing hard truths are essential for raising resilient kids. Setting goals and holding oneself accountable are important for personal growth and development.
• Parents should actively engage with their children and provide guidance and support.
• Discouraging self-obsessed and attention-seeking behaviors in children is crucial.
• The COVID-19 pandemic has had a negative impact on children's physical and mental health, and parents should help them stay active and engaged.

Send us Fan Mail

Reggie George shares his inspiring story of his daughter's near-fatal stabbing and miraculous recovery. After being stabbed in the head with a pair of scissors by another student, his daughter underwent an eight-hour brain surgery and suffered a massive stroke. She was paralyzed and had to spend 92 days in the hospital, including time in the ICU and rehab. Despite the initial prognosis, she defied all expectations and made a remarkable recovery, regaining her mobility and cognitive abilities. Reggie attributes their strength and resilience to their faith and the support of their family. Reggie George shares his journey of forgiveness and the birth of Father Figure Apparel. He talks about the importance of father figures and the impact they have on children's lives. Reggie emphasizes the need for fathers to be present and intentional, rather than striving for perfection. He also discusses the role of the community in supporting and uplifting fatherhood. The conversation highlights the power of vulnerability and the lessons learned from difficult experiences.

Key Takeaways

• The importance of faith and spirituality in dealing with difficult situations
• The power of resilience and determination in overcoming challenges
• The impact of strong family support in times of crisis
• The ability to find strength and purpose in being a father and leader, Father Figure Apparel was born out of Reggie George's journey of forgiveness and the desire to highlight the importance of father figures.
• Being present and intentional as a father is more important than striving for perfection.
• Fatherhood is not limited to biological fathers; father figures play a crucial role in children's lives.
• The community has a responsibility to support and uplift fatherhood.
• Vulnerability and open communication with children can strengthen the father-child relationship.
• Difficult experiences can teach valuable lessons and lead to personal growth.

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode, Robert interviews Ann Silvers, author of the book 'Abuse of Men by Women.' They discuss the prevalence of domestic violence against men, the misconceptions surrounding it, and the reasons behind it. Ann shares that domestic violence is just as common among men as it is among women, with a ratio of 1 in 2 for both genders. However, the issue is often overlooked and underreported. They also discuss the various forms of partner abuse and the tactics used by women to overcome the size disadvantage. The conversation highlights the need for emotional intelligence and coping skills to address domestic violence. False accusations and the devastating impact they have on men are discussed. The conversation highlights the cultural bias towards believing women and disbelieving men, which has led to a fast road for malicious women to get what they want. The conversation also touches on the challenges men face in leaving abusive relationships, including fear of losing their children, economic constraints, and shame and embarrassment. Warning signs of abuse in men are mentioned, and resources for support are provided.

Takeaways

• Domestic violence against men is more common than previously thought, with a ratio of 1 in 2 for both men and women.
• Partner abuse can take various forms, including physical, verbal, sexual, financial, legal, spiritual, and psychological/emotional abuse.
• Women can use tactics such as surprise attacks, false accusations, and object use to overcome the size disadvantage.
• Emotional intelligence and coping skills are crucial in addressing domestic violence.
• Cultural attitudes and media portrayals contribute to the misconception that violence against men is acceptable or humorous. False accusations can have devastating consequences for men, including loss of custody, domestic violence classes, and damage to their reputation.
• The cultural bias of believing women and disbelieving men has created a fast road for malicious women to make false accusations.
• Men may stay in abusive relationships due to fear of losing their children, economic constraints, and shame and embarrassment.
• It is important to take men's stories of abuse seriously and provide support without minimizing their experiences.
• Warning signs of abuse in men include physical injuries, emotional belittlement, and minimizing themselves.
• Resources for support include recording evidence, seeking legal advice, and finding people who can provide declarations of abuse.

Dad to Dads Podcast of IG https://www.instagram.com/dadtodads/
Dad to Dads Podcast on YT http://www.youtube.com/@dadtodadspodcast

Ann Silvers www.annsilvers.com
Ann Silvers on IG https://www.instagram.com/ann_silvers/

Building Skills to Uplevel Life: Silver Lining Emotional Intelligence Workbook https://www.amazon.com/s?k=ann+silvers&s=date-desc-rank&crid=36FDRN2YT1U69&qid=1717372580&sprefix=%2Caps%2C90&ref=sr_st_date-desc-rank&ds=v1%3AdSDgAo%2BbXyqR6ab35oBe3lEQzslBqS5qyklZXUJHwTM

Send us Fan Mail

Dr. MyRon Edmonds and Robert discuss the challenges and rewards of fatherhood. Dr. Edmonds shares his personal experience with father wounds and the impact it had on his relationship with his own father and his journey as a father. They emphasize the importance of leading with authenticity and vulnerability, and the need for fathers to model the behavior they expect from their children. They also discuss the significance of being present in the lives of their children and the power of relationships in shaping their development. The conversation explores the importance of fathers and the impact they have on their children's lives. It highlights the challenges faced by fathers in being present and engaged with their families. The societal attack on the role of fathers is discussed, along with the need for fathers to be mentors to other men. The conversation also touches on the divisiveness in society and the importance of unity in recognizing the importance of fatherhood. The power of fathers in shaping their children's identity and the crisis of identity in society are explored. The conversation concludes with a discussion about the Dr. MyRon Edmonds' new book 'Men's Breakthrough Devotional' and the 'Winning Circle' men's community.

Key Takeaways

• Fatherhood is a journey of self-mastery and personal growth.
• Children learn more about life through observation of their fathers than through direct communication.
• Fathers need to lead with authenticity and vulnerability, acknowledging their own struggles and mistakes.
• Being present in the lives of their children is the best gift fathers can offer.
• The impact of fathers on their children's lives and relationships is profound.
• Intergenerational trauma can be passed down through relational experiences.
• Fathers need to model the behavior they expect from their children.
• Honesty and transparency are essential in building trust and integrity with children.
• Being a father is both challenging and rewarding, and brings immense joy.
• Fatherhood requires constant self-reflection and a commitment to personal growth. Fathers need to be present and engaged with their families, as their absence can have a significant impact on their children's lives.
• There is a societal attack on the role of fathers, which undermines their importance and value.
• Fathers should serve as mentors to other men, helping them navigate the challenges of fatherhood.
• Society needs to recognize and appreciate the importance of fatherhood, fostering unity and support for fathers.
• Fathers play a crucial role in shaping their children's identity and providing them with a sense of purpose and direction.
• There is a crisis of identity in society, which can be addressed through the presence and guidance of fathers.
• The book 'Men's Breakthrough Devotional' offers inspiration and guidance for men seeking to optimize their lives.
• The 'Winning Circle' men's community provides support, accountability, and camaraderie for men striving to excel in their roles as husbands, fathers, and men of integrity.

Send us Fan Mail

Robert discusses parent alienation with expert Charlie McCready. Parent alienation is when one parent tries to damage the relationship between the other parent and their children. It often involves withholding the children from seeing the targeted parent and spreading negative narratives about them. Parent alienation can be divided into two phases: pre-alienation, where negative comments and undermining behaviors start to occur, and full-blown alienation, which intensifies after separation. Alienators are often driven by fear and insecurity, and they use control and manipulation to maintain power over the children. Charlie advises parents to focus on their children's needs, disengage from their own emotions, and send positive messages of love and support. For parents with no contact, he encourages them to learn about alienation and never give up hope. The principal themes of the conversation are reaching out to alienated children, the challenges of limited or no contact, the importance of patience and love, the need to focus on the present and future rather than the past, the danger of overwhelming children with emotions, the importance of being a positive role model, the impact of subconscious programming on children's behavior, the handling of angry children, the importance of self-help and personal growth, and the message of hope and resilience.

Key Takeaways:

• Parent alienation is a form of abuse that damages the relationship between a targeted parent and their children.
• Alienation can occur in two phases: pre-alienation, where negative comments and undermining behaviors start, and full-blown alienation, which intensifies after separation.
• Alienators are driven by fear and insecurity, and they use control and manipulation to maintain power over the children.
• Parents should focus on their children's needs, disengage from their own emotions, and send positive messages of love and support.
• For parents with no contact, it is important to learn about alienation and never give up hope for rebuilding the relationship with their children. Reaching out to alienated children requires patience, love, and respect for their boundaries.
• Limited or no contact with children is a harsh reality for some parents, but they must continue to conduct their lives and be prepared to help their children when they are ready.
• When children reach out, it is important for parents to avoid overwhelming them with emotions and focus on the present and future rather than the past.
• Parents should be positive role models and avoid talking about alienation, instead focusing on building trust and a healthy relationship with their children.
• Parents should be prepared to handle angry children by validating their feelings and creating a safe space for them to express their emotions.
• Self-help and personal growth are essential for parents to heal and overcome the emotional roller coaster of alienation.
• Hope and resilience are key in navigating the challenges of parental alienation and rebuilding relationships with children.

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode Robert interviews Bella Duncan (from www.akidwithtwohomes.com ) and her father Craig Duncan about their experiences as a divorced family. They discuss the emotions and challenges that arise during the transition between houses, particularly during pick-up and drop-off. Bella shares her perspective as a child of divorce, highlighting the mix of excitement and anxiety she feels during these transitions. Craig emphasizes the importance of being in a good state of mind and focusing on the well-being of the children during these moments. They also discuss how to handle holidays and vacations, emphasizing the need for flexibility and focusing on the positive aspects of each situation. In this part of the conversation, Bella and her dad discuss the days when they miss each other extra and how they cope with it. Bella shares her experience of waking up in the middle of the night and worrying about her dad, and how her mom would comfort her. She emphasizes the importance of parents acknowledging and validating their child's feelings of missing the other parent, rather than dismissing or minimizing them. Craig adds that it's important for parents to accept that their children love and adore both parents equally, and to create a safe space for them to express their emotions. They also discuss the importance of maintaining a lifelong relationship with their children and putting their needs first.

• Transitions between houses can be emotionally challenging for children of divorce, as they experience a mix of excitement and anxiety.
• Parents should strive to be in a good state of mind during pick-up and drop-off, focusing on the well-being of the children and creating a positive atmosphere.
• Flexibility is key when it comes to holidays and vacations, allowing for celebrations to take place on different days and making the most of the time spent with each parent.
• Children of divorce may have moments of longing for a 'normal' family, but it's important for parents to remind them that their unique family dynamic can still be fulfilling and something to be proud of.
• Open communication and empathy are crucial in helping children navigate the challenges of divorce and ensuring they feel supported and loved by both parents. Children may have days when they miss their other parent extra, and it's important for parents to acknowledge and validate their feelings.
• Parents should create a safe space for their children to express their emotions and offer support and comfort.
• It's crucial for parents to accept that their children love and adore both parents equally, and to foster a positive co-parenting relationship.
• Maintaining a lifelong relationship with children requires effort and understanding, and it's important to prioritize their needs.
• Parents should focus on the well-being and happiness of their children, even if it means putting aside personal conflicts or differences.

Send us Fan Mail

Last time on the podcast she became a viral sensation because of some of her remarks. Erin Schaden, a family law attorney, divorce coach, and mediator, is back on the podcast and she's not holding back.  Great interview where we discuss various topics related to divorce and custody battles. Erin shares her insights on how unfortunately custody can be used as a weapon to hurt the other parent, the impact of false allegations in obtaining protective orders, and the manipulation of child support. We also discuss the importance of focusing on the best interests of the children and the need for maturity and accountability in divorce proceedings. We also explore the various aspects of domestic violence, gender bias in restraining orders, the impact of domestic violence on men, the perception of men and women in divorce, the role of emotional immaturity in divorce, the flaws in the divorce process, the potential negative impact of AI in divorce, and the importance of taking responsibility and creating safe spaces. 

• Custody battles can often become a tool for one parent to hurt the other, leading to negative consequences for the children involved.
• False allegations in obtaining protective orders can be used as a strategy to gain an advantage in custody disputes.
• Child support guidelines may not always be fair, and lower-income individuals can struggle to meet their financial obligations while maintaining a relationship with their children.
• It is crucial for parents to prioritize the well-being of their children and avoid using them as pawns in divorce proceedings. Domestic violence is a serious issue that affects both men and women.
• Gender bias can exist in the process of obtaining restraining orders.
• Men can also be victims of domestic violence and face challenges in seeking help.
• Emotional immaturity can contribute to the breakdown of relationships.
• The divorce process can be flawed and lead to unnecessary conflict.
• Advancements in AI may not necessarily improve the divorce process.
• Creating safe spaces and promoting understanding can help improve relationships and prevent divorce.

This is an episode you do not want to miss!!

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode, Dr. Daniel David, men's mental health expert, discusses the impact of narcissism and borderline personality disorder on children. He explains how children's identity development is affected when their needs are overshadowed by a narcissistic parent's need for attention and admiration. Dr. David emphasizes the importance of positive regard and mirroring in a child's development and the role of both mothers and fathers in providing nurturing and acceptance. He also discusses the challenges of mother enmeshment and the negative impact it can have on boys' ability to form healthy relationships in adulthood. This conversation explores the impact of unhealthy mother-son relationships, the influence of 90s parenting on these relationships, and the theme of control in narcissism and borderline personality disorder. It also discusses the need for assertiveness in passive children, mothers' understanding of child development, and the importance of letting go and allowing children to experience life.

 Takeaways

• Children's identity development is influenced by the positive regard and mirroring they receive from their parents.
• Narcissistic and borderline personality disorder parents often prioritize their own needs over their children's, leading to a deficit in the child's sense of self.
• Mothers and fathers play different roles in a child's development, with mothers providing nurturing love and fathers providing accepting love.
• Children who grow up with narcissistic parents may struggle to develop their own identity and may exhibit passive or people-pleasing behaviors.
• It is important for non-disordered parents to provide unconditional love and affirmation to their children, offsetting the negative impact of a narcissistic parent.
• Mother enmeshment can hinder a boy's ability to separate from his mother and form healthy relationships in adulthood. Unhealthy mother-son relationships can lead to enmeshment and hinder the son's ability to form healthy relationships with women.
• The overindulgence and overprotectiveness of children in the 90s has contributed to a generation of highly anxious and depressed individuals.
• Control is a central theme in narcissism and borderline personality disorder, with narcissistic parents seeking to maintain a positive image and borderline parents fearing abandonment.
• Encouraging assertiveness in passive children can help them develop their own voice and set boundaries.
• Mothers need to understand child development and the importance of letting go, allowing their children to develop their own identities.

Send us Fan Mail

In this episode, I interview best selling author David Magee, author of ‘Dear William, A Father’s Memoir of Addiction, Recovery, Love and Loss’. We delve into Magee's book 'Dear William,' which explores the importance of preparing children for life’s challenges as well as the struggles and recovery of an American family. Magee emphasizes the significance of vulnerability and honest conversations in relationships, as well as the need to break the cycle of brokenness while sharing personal experiences of addiction and mental health issues within his family. We also discuss the pressure parents feel to shape their children's lives and the importance of finding internal joy. In this conversation, Magee discusses his regrets as a parent and the importance of listening to children, while also emphasizing the role of being a mentor rather than dictating the path for children. David shares a powerful moment with his late son William, where they looked up at the stars on an extremely cold night in New Mexico and felt a deep connection to God. He also discusses the creation of the William McGee Center at Ole Miss and the upcoming movie adaptation of his book 'Dear William.' 

Takeaways

• Vulnerability and honest conversations are crucial in building strong relationships.
• Addiction and mental health issues are complex and require compassion and understanding.
• Parents should focus on internal joy and helping their children become the best versions of themselves, rather than trying to shape their lives according to societal expectations.
• Breaking the cycle of brokenness requires self-reflection, recognizing mistakes, and making changes. Parents should focus on cultivating relationships with their children and listening to them rather than making decisions for them.
• Being a mentor involves guiding and supporting children while allowing them to find their own path.
• Letting children struggle and take personal responsibility helps them develop resilience.
• Finding moments of connection with loved ones can be powerful and transformative.

Send us Fan Mail