Dan and Maureen are out of the news business this week. It’s bad. Instead, this Says Who is about culture! Fun things! Things that make Dan and Maureen happy!

At least, it will be once Maureen is done explaining all the things she has to do to get ready for Oscar’s green card interview in the morning. So much paperwork. So many details. What did they serve at the wedding? Was there cake? There were jars of stuff, but what was in them? Dan will try to get a word in edgewise, but he will not succeed. And then…out come the dead flowers.

The green card interviewer has no idea what is about to happen to them.

Just fill in this form right here, Says Whovia. Your citizenship is guaranteed. But what was in the jars?

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